Game Show NewsNet

Episode 6 - August 26

Apparently, the WB has so little faith in the show that they've pulled not only the Sunday repeats that help with my recapping, but we won't get to see week seven. Screw 'em, then, we've still got a show to do, and someone here is gonna win a BUNCH of money. Let's meet the players:

Boaz Frankel, 22, Portland, Oregon. Just finished NYU. Wants to donate to hometown.
Cassie Lilly, 21 Greenbelt, MD Not shy about winning.
Jonathan Gabrus, 22, Wantagh, NY
Matt Freitas, 19, Chelmsford, MA. Very competitive.
Nicole Cutrufello, 22, Roselle Park, NJ. Nicole is trying to play up the airhead thing.
Sean Patrick Taylor, 23, Brooklyn, NY. Sean could have tried out for "The Challengers," he loves current events.
Stephanie Chu, 21, Atlanta, GA Goes to Columbia.

A note to my fair readers, if the question was answered correctly, the pertinent information is underlined. If answered incorrectly, you'll see both the wrong answer, and the correct one.

ROUND ONE: 2001-2004

5, Boaz: In December 2003, Michael Jackson was interviewed by Ed Bradley from "60 Minutes".

7, Matt: In 2003, J.K. Rowling became the wealthiest British woman in show business, surpassing the Queen. Matt asks Boaz for help. Boaz looks like Harry Potter? No matter, Boaz says JK, and they're right.

2, Nicole: On 26-October-2001, the Patriot Act was signed into law. And I'll still go to the library, even if the FBI knows what I'm reading. Choke on it, feebs.

(?) Jon: David Gest filed a lawsuit against wife Liza Minnelli.

4, Stephanie: Royston Langdon from the British band 'Spacehog' married whom in 2003?
Stephanie's Wrong Answer: Natalie Portman
Correct Answer: Liv Tyler

Well, I can excuse that wrong answer. Too bad it still counts.

3: SP: September 2003, Seattle, Washington held a recreation of the Boston Tea Party to protest an espresso tax.

(T-Note: I think I'm the only person on the planet to have Starbucks stock, but who won't drink any of their products. No matter...)

Cassie: Dean Kamon invented what two-wheeled vehicle in December 2001?
Cassie asks Sean Patrick. SP is not giving any help.
Cassie: Mobile Scooter
Right: Segway Human Transporter, not enough information. Too bad.

It's time for a vote. Who stands in your way of fiscal solvency?

Jon votes to boot Cassie.
Sean Patrick votes to boot Cassie for the Segway question.
Nicole votes to boot Cassie, over the dumb blonde stereotyping. Karma's a bitch, ain't it. Bye, Cass.

And then there were six.

ROUND TWO: 2004.

By the way, this is a single elimination round, unlike before. Confused? Yeah, me too. Onward.

Jon: Bush said the use of steroids is dangerous and sends the wrong message to kids. Jon asks Sean Patrick. But it was a waste. OK, Bush has done one thing I approve of.

Nicole: Don King urged African Americans to vote for Bush.

Stephanie: Carb Karma was released by Ben and Jerry's.

Sean Patrick: Brad Pitt portrayed whom in "Troy"?
Sean Patrick asks Boaz. Boaz doesn't know, and he's sad, because there's no vote to save you now...
Sean Patrick's Wrong Answer: Odysseus
Correct Answer: Achilles

Sean Patrick is out. Aw, shucks.

ROUND THREE: Last Month. We're back to the vote for the losers.

Nicole: 1 July, Sony plans to rival Apple's iPod.

Stephanie: 20 July, Jenna Bush stuck out her tongue to the press at a St. Louis airport.

Jon: 7 July, John McEnroe got his own talk show. Jon, you may answer the question...

Matt: 6 July, Angelina Jolie was offered Cambodian citizenship because of her humanitarian efforts.

Boaz: 7, July, John Kerry says "We've got a better sense of what's happening to America and we've got better..." Boaz likes Robo-Kiernan's hair, and hair is correct.

Stephanie: 7 July, Ed McMahon joined ALF on the premiere of a TV Land talk show. Stephanie answered, "Elmo." Stephanie is off to the Block, ring in tow.

Jon: 8 July, which rock star underwent heart surgery for a blocked artery?
Jon's Obviously Wrong Answer: Elton John
Correct Answer: David Bowie

THE VOTE
Nicole can't vote off another girl. One for Jon.
Boaz opts to kick off the person who won't lay the smack down in the Specialty Topic. One for Stephanie.
Matt votes to put the money over relationships. Jon may not know the material, and Stephanie is gone.

Maybe Stephanie can get a few dollars for the ring if she sells it on eBay, but she gets no money from Michael Davies and company.

ROUND FOUR: The specialty topic. Making of cheese, facts about American cheese. Whee.

Jon eats lots of cheese, but that's all.

Jon: Early cheese coloring agents were made from marigold petals and carrots.

Boaz: What is the second most popular cheese in the US? Boaz doesn't want to use his ring, since he likely won't know another question. And yet you get a whole week to study this stuff. Boaz is in a big horkin' catch-22, and he decides to go for it:
Boaz' Wrong Answer: Cheddar
Correct Answer: Mozzarella. If you watched night three of Greed, you might have known that.

Round four is over, and once again, my pick to win the money is shown the door.

ROUND FIVE: Insane Memorization Challenge. Billboard Number Ones: From 1989, Song, Artist, Date it reached number one, length of stay. 128 elements.

(T-Note: Jon is going down faster than a cheap prom date.)

Jon: 96 elements. "Right Here Waiting" instead of "Don't Wanna Lose You"
Nicole: 60. "Baby Don't Forget My Number" instead of "Satisfied"
Matt: 21. Matt: "Fine Young Cannibals" instead of "Mike + the Mechanics"

Jon is shocked, as am I, along with the other players. Matt is gone. 21? That's ALL? Oh well.

ROUND SIX: The $77,000 Race.
Nicole is totally shaking right now.

Jon opts to play first.

Typically, I don't like to take the name of my Lord in vain. But after you find out what happened, I think He'll forgive me...

Holy Sweet Mother of God. 57.17 seconds is the time set by Jon. He interrupts at the right times, and only misses one. Any other show, he'd have the money locked up.

Nicole is now up. Maybe they left the sound on in her booth, because she interrupts with correct answer after correct answer. She answers Jeopardy with 15 seconds to go, and becomes player number seven in the Grand Final. And Ken Jennings is now famous, he's been a trivia answer on a low-rated game show, only we never heard the full question.

Wow, this show proved that the show crawls for the first 40 minutes, but kicks into high gear at the end. Only one left, and someone is going to be obscenely wealthy in a few days. Until Grand Championship Thursday, I'm Travis Eberle, and thank you for your participation.