Round of Six - January 18
It's your standard Fox reality show formula. Find
a format that works... tweak it... Pass it off as your own. Thus "Skating with
Celebrities" was born out of the rib that was "Dancing with the Stars".
It's really simple... It's skating, yeah? And
celebrities are involved, yeah? And you're scored on both choreography and
technical merit. And every week, one couple is knocked out. Just like "Dancing
with the Stars". And guess who's in charge... Not Gordon. He's busy. Not Julie.
She's busy. Not Joe. He's ... smart. Not Block. He's... also smart. That just
And get this.. Fox said 75 stars were lined up to
do this... I'll believe that. Especially given THESE six, paired with six
skaters who just said, "You know what? Screw Torino."
Dave Coulier (actor, "Full House"), paired
with Nancy Kerrigan (two-time Olympic medalist at Albertville in 1992 and
Lillehammer in 1994).
Todd Bridges (actor, "Diff'rent Strokes"), paired with Jenni Meno
(three-time US pairs champion with husband Todd Sand)
Kristy Swanson (actress, "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"), paired with
Lloyd Eisler (two-time Olympic medalist with Isabelle Brasseur)
Deborah Gibson (Broadway actress/singer), paired with Kurt Browning
(four-time world champion)
Jillian Barberie (commentator for the NFL on Fox), paired with John
Zimmerman (three-time US champion)
Bruce Jenner (Olympic track star), paired with Tai Babilonia
And officiating? Perennial Family Feud loser...
sorry... world champion and former Olympic commentator Scott Hamilton, alongside
Olympic swimming champ and host of Nick's "Figure It Out" Summer Sanders.
"Can you believe we actually did this?" Scott.. I
still can't believe you blew off Italy for this... "What were we thinking?" Yes,
Scott... what WERE y'all thinking?
But enough rambling from the reporter. Here are
Member of the Figure Skating Hall of Fame and
coach of such figures as Peggy Fleming and Sasha Cohen, the resident British
dude... Sir John Nicks.
Olympic figure skating analyst for CNN and founder of International Figure
Skating magazine, the resident guy who likes flare... Mark Lund.
Olympic gold medalist and winner of an Emmy for...well, something... the
resident Paula Abdul figure... Dorothy Hamill.
As the contest progresses, each pair must master
a new and more difficult technique. Tonight, it's all about ... the spin. Each
spin must have three revolutions and can be executed as a single or a pair spin.
Oh yeah, and each show also has a musical theme.
Tonight, we're going to the movies.
First up, Kurt Browning faces the task of
transforming former popstar and currently Broadway siren Debbie... sorry,
Deborah... Gibson. Kurt says that they need to utilize her Broadway skills. They
plan on doing so to "How Do You Like Your Eggs in the Morning?" from "Rich,
Young & Pretty". ... I've seen better, but not bad for a start. Dorothy called
it enchanting. Sir John said that there was too much fluff, not enough
substance. Mark liked the spin, but faults Kurt on technical... And now, will
the judges please reveal the scores...
Their total: 48 out of 60. Nice start, but we've still got five more pairs...
Bruce Jenner and Tai Babilonia, two Olympians in
their own rite... and old friends... meet on a similar battleground. With no
experience, Bruce's first casualty... his knee... In the first week. After a
month of trailing, can he rise to the occasion? They ice-dance to "Up Where We
Belong" from "An Officer and a Gentleman". Complete with officer garb. John says
that Tai is still one of the most beautiful skaters in the world... but! Bruce
is a wonderful athlete... whose artistry is nonexistent. Dorothy liked it. Mark
commends the pair for their work.
And now, will the judges please reveal the
Their total: 48.8 out of 60. Good to take the lead. But still, I have to wonder
who slipped the Haterade into the judges' waters this morning.
Next up, a person whose CV includes both "Big
Daddy" and "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and ... Lloyd Eisler. We have our first
challenge. Kristy is left-handed. Lloyd is right. Will this be a hamper or a
help? "What have I gotten myself into?" (C-Note: Couldn't be any worse than
"Mannequin 2"... BaZING!). They do their thing with "Air That I Breathe" from
"The Virgin Suicides"... Damn, when's someone going to get to Mortal Kombat
already? Anyways... Sir John liked the lifts, but other than that.. NOTHING.
Dorothy agrees. Mark called it a "good first trial", but it needs more energy.
And now, will the judges please reveal the
Their total: 47.5. Three down, and they're in
Next, Todd Bridges, whose skating expertise is
limited to... rollerskating. Jenni, on the other hand, is worried about the
dangers Todd faces. All his joints... hurt. But Jenni has problems... dancing.
Can Jenni find the beat? Can Todd find his footing? Time to go to the "Wild Wild
West". The answer... kinda... Mark thinks Jenni can almost dance now, calling
Todd on a marked improvement. Dorothy loved it. Sir John... "It was a very
exciting performance, because any moment, I thought you were going to fall down
and break your neck! Dump this program and go to plan B!" And now, will the
judges please reveal the scores...
Their total: 47.7. They edge out Kristy & Lloyd,
but just much.
Next up, requisite Fox employee and freelance
skater Jillian Barberie teams up with champion skater and freelance model John
Zimmerman. Jillian wants to push herself to her limit... and John needs to stop
her. She's convinced that it's a sign of growth. They just need to worry about
doing a clean program... but will they? They perform their program to "The
Trouble with Love Is" from "Love Actually." Mark called it "first class".
Dorothy: "You guys are hot!" Sir John: "Difficult to find much wrong with that
one." I think we have our first favorite to win here... And now, will the judges
please reveal the scores...
Their score: 51.8. And Mark Thompson just took a
Finally, the style and grace of Nancy Kerrigan...
meets a hockey nut. Dave Coulier is a semi-professional amateur player... with
the wrong skates on. With figure skates on... he faces the dreaded toepicks. So
much so that he's going to grind them off... Wil this come back to stab him in
the butt? He plays Elwood to Nancy's Jake with "Soul Man" from "The Blues
Brothers". And it looks like the toepicks didn't seem to matter. Mark called it
entertaining. Dorothy called it fun. Sir John, in his best Len Goodman, calls
Dave on his hockey background, wondering if he'd rather have a hockey stick or
Nancy in his hand. And now, will the judges please reveal the scores...
Their total: 49.3. Good for second place behind
Jillian & Jon. Here's the board.
Jillian & John: 51.8
Dave & Nancy: 49.3
Bruce & Tai: 48.8
Deborah & Kurt: 48.0
Todd & Jenni: 47.7
Kristy & Lloyd: 47.5
Remember, these numbers will be combined with the
numbers from the next show. Who'll be the first to skate back to anonymity? Find
out next time!... Or not.