Ready to
Rock
October 29
Eleven beautiful, talented, and troubled women
have dreams of rock'n'roll stardom, but until now, their own troubles have kept
their dreams on hold. Fuse is giving them one last chance to get themselves
together long enough to have their dreams realized. At stake, a recording deal
from Geffen Records
Here to help are Chris Jericho (wrestler,
musician, and pop culture panelist who informs them that this could be their
last chance at redemption), Ron Fair (chairman of Geffen Records, who says to
consider everyone signed as of right now, but not everyone will make it through
to the end), and Grammy-award-winning vocal coach Mauli B, who's looking for a
total package.
As a performer, you have to be ready to sing any
time, any where. Including... right now. The first challenge is to sing "I'm
Every Woman" in a singoff. The winners will get first choice of beds in the
house.
First up, Toni (former druggie with a rap sheet)
vs. Jazmin (threw a woman through a window once). Toni changed keys into the
chorus. Jazmin gets first choice.
Kededra (got into exotic dancing to get her
boyfriend a lawyer) takes on Elisa (stalked the lead singer of Cobra Starship
while she was in the band). Kededra wins.
Next up, Mixi (who even auditioned for this show
shitfaced drunk) and Esther (party girl in NYC who's "tried every drug").
Instantly, I think Mixi's still a little bit gone in. But still, she gets in.
Joie (had a bad attitude) and Nyia (single mother
and lesbian) are next. Joie has the nod.
That leaves Farah (ran an escort service that
specialized in stealing stuff) and Angelica (former child star). Angelica wins.
For those five winners, first choice of beds and rooms in the house. They have
the upper hand... for now.
For the five losers... consider this your first,
last, and only warning. "And by the way, there's only nine beds in the house.
You better move quickly."
Time to eat. There are ten singers... but 11
places? Could there be something up? No sooner than that happens than someone
enters singing "I'm Every Woman"... And who might you be... This is Kendra, the
11th player (she says she wants to pee in everyone's food). Everyone's sizing
her up, and Kendra feels like the black sheep right off the bat.
And what's a reality show without alcohol?
The girls take the night out to play a little
truth or dare, where we get into the backstories of said singers. Jazmin says
that the girls are focused on what they're singing and not necessarily why
they're here...
... and this is relevant, because the next
morning is the first extreme elimination challenge. The girls are going to be
split into three groups and given one song to be sung at any time.
- "Rehab" by Amy Winehouse: Toni, Jazmin, Farah
- "My Own Worst Enemy" by Lit: Kendra, Joie, Nyia, Mixi
- "Hit Me With Your Best Shot" by Pat Benatar: Esther, Angelica, Kededra, Elisa
Farah says she has a crazy sensitive throat and
she loses her voice. She says drinking too much got in her own way. Some of the
ladies have no vocal training whatsoever. Toni didn't sound believable, while
Mixi has zero sense up in there. Elisa has no confidence in learning covers. But
she develops it rather quickly.
Esther's hiding somewhere. "I've been here." She
was practicing in her room... apparently. She says this could be her last chance
pushing 30. She says she's been working hard on it for an hour. Mauli says that
in his head, he's the first one to go home.
Note from Chris! "I hope you've worked hard
today, because I've planned a special reward for you: a night on the town at
some of LA's hottest music night spots. And the party starts here."
Nyia is moping about missing her kids, while
Angelica notes that she shouldn't be here if she's missing her kids that much.
She wasn't trying to make her sad, but it's hard for Nyia to keep her cool.
Stuff gets heated.
"So, shots?" Only you, Mixi... Only you.
Next stop, the party bus. From there, some
legendary LA venues. Jazmin is quick to point out that maybe they'll be asked to
perform at some of them. She and Kededra come to blows over singing ability...
Shouting. Toni thinks... if you're going to be singing at a venue, do you
honestly need to be shouting? Jazmin bets Kededra $1000 that she'll outlast her.
Heh.
Anyway, we finally head to the Roxy first... and
there's Ron Fair. And all they want to say is "Wake up, bitches... wake up."
With that, Ron hands each of them a record, a
symbolic record. So long as they are still in the competition, they get to keep
it. But if you get dropped, you have to give it up.
After that, we get a performance from Shwayze
("Corona and Lime").
Next spot gives the girls the VIP treatment at
the Avalon... but remember what Chris said to start the show: "You have to be
ready to sing anytime, anywhere." It's time to sing!
Judging tonight are Mauli B, A&R exec Erica
Grayson, and product manager Andrew Flad. Tonight, we'll be announcing one
winner and a bottom three. The girls will sing individually.
First up, Group #2 with "My Own Worst Enemy". And
to the surprise of no one, Mixi performed thoroughly plastered. Kendra
absolutely hates this song. Mauli B is embarrassed, having the women make him
look bad. And for good reason... She shot before she came on stage. Joie says
she delivered a good song.
Next up, Group #3 with "Hit Me With Your Best
Shot". Esther says that she was in her moment. Elisa completely blanked,
forgetting her lyrics. That is a cardinal sin. Angelica just ripped it up on
stage, but she was mad at herself for "not doing it perfectly."
Finally, Group #1 with "Rehab". Farah's raspy
throat gets the better of her. Toni was completely off key. Jazmin wasn't as
nervous as she thought she was going to be.
Now to the elimination. Tonight's winner is...
Jazmin!
Now, the judges have determined that three others
are so bad that they don't even deserve to be in the competition. Those three
are... Toni, Kendra, and Elisa. Jazmin, as the winner of the Ambush Performance,
gets to save one of these three from elimination.
Toni had no focus, no heart, and that she was the
worst of the worst. She wants to stay because she knows she has to crank it up.
Elisa embarrassed the heck out of Mauli. Angelica
says she's clearly not ready for it. She says she's a hard worker.
Kendra thought this was all a joke. "I'm so (^_^)ing
pissed at myself." She says she can taste it, and that Elisa should be the one
to go home.
But Jazmin has the power to save one from
elimination... She saves Kendra.
That leaves Elisa and Toni. Going home tonight...
is Toni. "Tonight, you've been dropped from the label." All of a sudden, the
competition is that much more real.
As for Toni, she didn't think it was going to be
her. She's pissed off, and she'll go home knowing she made it this far. Well,
that's something.
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