"I'm Going to Jail" -
PIT STOP: LAKE MANYARA, TANZANIA
After dealing with plane delays, aggressive bus drivers,
hauling chairs and gulping down an ostrich egg, Chip &
Kim (Married Parents) arrive at the PIT STOP in first.
The field has been narrowed down to five as Charla &
Mirna (Team Hi-Lo) - after MANY highs and lows - were
eliminated much to the delight of the other teams...
except their partners Linda & Karen (Team Bowling Moms).
Near the shore of an animal watering hole near Mt.
Kilimanjaro, the ten remaining Racers eat, sleep and
shmooze for 12 hours. No one is happier for "Mirna &
Shmirna"'s elimination than Colin & Christie (Team Type
A)... but will their drive to get back to the #1 spot be
their undoing? And will Kami & Karli (Team Twins)
FINALLY get out of the cellar?!
Chip & Kim stand on the PIT STOP mat in the dead of
night (it's 2:42am local time) and rip open the clue to
start the eighth leg of the Race:
Take a taxi back to
Kilimanjaro Airport (over 100 miles away). Take one
of three charter flights (leaving at 8:30am, 9:30am
and 10:30am; first come first serve; only two teams
per flight) to Nairobi, Kenya and then fly to the
city of Dubai, United Arab Emirates (over 2200 miles
away). Once there, find the Burj Al Arab Hotel and
find your next clue across the street from it. You
have $200 for this leg of the Race.
But the Married Parents
are about to learn that the Tanzanian taxi drivers take
their cue from Tanzanian bus drivers when it comes to
fleecing... I mean, asking tourists for money. The first
one they encounter asks for $150. but Kim manages to
find one that'll do the job for $100. They believe their
friendliness to the natives will pull them through. Chip
has a philosophy from "Rock 'N' Me": all the things that
he does will come back to him in his sweet time.
On the OTHER end of the spectrum, Team Type A will do
anything and everything to get the lead back. They leave
18 minutes later and try to haggle with the cabbie to
come down from $100... but nothing doing. They tell the
driver he better be fast for that kind of spread. Team
Bowling Moms leave six minutes after them and don't seem
to mind spending half their allowance on the trip. Four
minutes LATER, Brandon & Nicole (Models) depart the PIT
STOP. They try to find a cheap cab, but no one's going
for less than $100. Team Twins are right on their tail
and a mere half-hour behind the lead. They claim they
need to slow down and think more (there's a stretch).
It's another "Cannonball Run" scenario as Linda & Karen
edge up on Colin & Christie. Colin tells the driver he's
not getting paid if they're passed... and the driver
lets them pass anyway. Not only that, but Brandon &
Nicole ALSO pass them...and Colin is not very happy at
ALL. The Models then proceed to pass Team Bowling Moms
into second. Then, as if Team Type A wasn't frustrated
ENOUGH, their cab's tire blows out. And there is no
spare tire because, well, the guy was DRIVING on it.
Colin is mad as all hell.
But help is on the way (unintentionally, of course).
Team Twins' cab stops and, when Colin explains they need
THEIR spare tire, the sisters agree to help. Colin
doesn't even THANK them, so Kami & Karli just drive off,
leaving him and Christie in dead last for the first time
in this Race.
Team Type A isn't the ONLY one with car trouble; Linda &
Karen had the misfortune of hailing a cab with hardly
any oil in the engine. As they pull over, who should
come up but Team Twins? But THIS time, they REFUSE to
stop and help them, much to the mothers' chagrin. Colin
& Christie, with new 'donut' in place, DO stop. But the
best they can do is give Team Bowling Moms the driver's
cell phone to call another cab. Once the call is done
and another cab is confirmed to be about 10 minutes
away, they speed off, leaving Linda & Karen to wait and
pray for the new cab to come ASAP.
At the airport, Chip & Kim arrive and give the driver
his C-note plus a $20 tip, which Kim doesn't approve of.
They sign up for the 8:30 flight. The Models arrive,
sign up for the same flight, then pay off the driver in
Kenyan AND American money... or should I say TRIED to.
The cabbie wants $100 and Brandon, as
non-confrontational as ever, lets him have it. Chip
tries to explain to an irate Nicole that this is a way
of life for them and Brandon tells her to "chill out"...
which makes her MORE irate.
While the argument continues between the Models, Kami &
Karli arrive and sign up for the second charter, happy
to be out of last and into third. Colin & Christie
arrive next... and Colin stays true to his word and only
gives the driver $50. When the driver demands the $100
promised, Colin gives him what he thinks he deserves for
driving an unsafe car: nothing! Christie signs up for
the second charter flight... but the taxi driver is not
leaving without his $100, no matter HOW important Colin
thinks this Race is. As they yell, Linda & Karen show up
and sign-up for the last flight, departing two hours
behind first place.
8:30am flight: Married Parents & Models
9:30am flight: Team Type A & Team Twins
10:30am flight: Team Bowling Moms
Then things boil over for Team Type A. The driver has
contacted the local police and is DEMANDING his $100,
but Colin is as adamant as ever. "You can take $50 or
you can take nothing," continues to be the team's
mantra. The cop decides to take Colin & Christie down
the road to their station to explain things to the
chief. Christie starts to have second thoughts about
dealing with the law, but Colin is certain this will be
cleared up in "five minutes". But it isn't, since the
chief - named Sam Manhalwa, in case you're wondering -
takes some time to get to the station. Colin explains
things to Sam and repeats the mantra. He starts to leave
the station, but Sam wants to talk about this some more.
When Colin refuses and gets angry at the chief about
"contracts", Christie BEGS him to pay the $100 so they
can make their flight. But Colin refuses... and Sam
invites him back inside the station so the driver can
file a criminal case against him. Finally,
Colin relents, tosses the $100 on the table and stomps
out the door. As they walk back, Colin mutters
about "wanting a different kind of relationship" with
When they return to the other teams, Colin tells them
that "Christie was freaking out" and that she blew his
chance to get his way. Christie gives Colin the "evil
eye" and walks out the door to de-stress.
8:30 finally arrives and the Married Parents and the
Models get on the first flight, retracing their route
back to Kenya. After Christie tells Colin he mishandled
things, they and Team Twins get on the second flight,
leaving Team Bowling Moms the third flight to
At 9:40am, the first plane lands in Kenya and the two
teams run in to find commercial flights to Dubai. Both
teams find a Kenya Air flight that leaves at noon and
they take it. An hour later, the second flight lands and
THOSE two teams get on the SAME flight. But Linda &
Karen may be out of luck because their plane lands 20
minutes before the Dubai flight takes off! They even SEE
the four other teams as they taxi to the terminal. They
run inside and beg to get on the flight. But they say
it's impossible... and the flight takes off without
But Linda & Karen are tough birds; they won't give up
without a fight. When Kenya Air says there are no other
flights to Dubai today, they troll the airport for other
tickets. The best they can get is a flight that takes
off as the other four teams land in...
DUBAI, UNTIED ARAB EMIRATES
As the sun sets over one of the seven former sheikdoms
that Britain melded into one, the four teams sprint out
of the airport and go for taxis. Kami & Karli are first
to get a cab to the Burj Al Arab Hotel. It's not like it
could be missed, though; the thousand-foot structure
looks like a colorful sailboat at night! Right behind
them are Brandon & Nicole, Colin & Christie and Chip &
Kim in that order.
Team Twins spy the Route Marker... but their driver
doesn't want to stop
and block any incoming traffic so he goes to the covered
"kiosk" (sort of a "taxi stop") to drop them off. It
seems ALL the cabbies feel the same way, because ALL of
them drive past the clue to the kiosk... except for the
Marries Parents'; THEIR cab stop before they get TO the
clue and, as such, Chip reaches it before Kami does:
Welcome to the world's
largest offshore hotel (the hotel is on an island
just slightly in the Persian Gulf and is connected
to the mainland by a short bridge). The next clue is
on the helipad on the top of the hotel. The heliport
is open from 8am to 6pm local time.
So... suffice it to say
they missed the cut-off time (it's 6:15pm) and any
chance they have in keeping Team Bowling Moms out of it
is dashed. At least they get a 14-hour break out
of the deal.
Just after midnight, Linda & Karen arrive at Dubai
International, considerably less optimistic than before.
Their optimism returns in force when they get the clue
and realize that they're back in the hunt.
As it must, the sun rises over the Arab nation. And the
teams, having spent the night and various hotels around
Dubai, merge back at the Burj Al Arab Hotel and take in
its beauty and splendor, especially in the glass
elevator ride to the top. Even Christie can't help
giving a kiss to Colin when he asks for one. The teams
reach the helipad and they all take the clue waiting for
Make your way across
Dubai to Bur Dubai Abra Station and take a water
taxi (an "abra") to the Port of Dubai. There is a
marked dhow boat in the port. Board it and the
captain will give you your next clue.
The teams leave in taxis
in the same order they arrived in Dubai, except that the
Married Parents and Team Type A swap positions. Kim is
more concerned about whether they have enough money for
the cab ride than getting to the water taxi on time.
Once again, Linda & Karen pass Colin & Christie... but,
unlike before, Team Type A keeps their cool since
they're all close together.
At the Abra Station, Team Twins are the first out to
look for the water taxi. Brandon & Nicole give their
cabbie a $20 bill because he has no change for it. The
Married Parents get on the taxi and the other two teams
instinctively head for the same one. As they head off
(and they compare cab fares) Team Bowling Moms and Team
Type A hop on another taxi.
The first group disembarks at the Port of Dubai. Chip &
Kim ask for directions to the specific captain's "dhow".
Getting them, they arrive first and the captain hands
OFF PLANE OR OFF-ROAD?
OFF PLANE: Head for the
Umm Al Quwain Aeroclub and skydive in tandem
with an instructor 10,000 feet down to the Margham
Red Dunes. Once you
land, the instructors will lead you to your next
clue. Only one team
can board a plane at a time, and planes take off
every 45 minutes.
OFF-ROAD: Head for the Margham Red Dunes and drive a
across a marked six-mile course through the desert,
with a safety guide
along for the ride. When you reach the same spot as
landing zone, you can get your next clue. Should you
get stuck, you
must call for a tow truck to get you out.
Just one problem for the
Married Parents: no matter what they do, they have next
to no money for the taxi. They look for a cheap one as
they decide on OFF-ROAD. The Models and Team Twins
decide to go OFF PLANE... as soon as they each get a
cab, that is. Brandon's not sure about skydiving since,
if they don't beat the wins to the runway, they'll have
to wait 45 minutes.
As Chip & Kim try to find a cabbie that KNOWS either
place to go, the last two teams arrive. They both decide
on OFF-ROAD and get cabs in a hurry. The Married Parents
FINALLY get a cab... but the money is the main concern
At the Aeroclub, both teams drive PAST the flag leading
to the runway. Karli KNEW this was where to go...
but Kami wouldn't listen. Brandon realizes they passed
the airport and gets the driver to turn around, with
Kami & Karli right behind them. They both find the
flags, get out of the cabs and race for the sign-up
point. And Brandon & Nicole... are team # 1, leaving
Team Twins to wait 45 minutes... and feeling they are
toast in the Race.
Meanwhile, Team Type A arrives at the OFF-ROAD (Colin
really wanted to skydive, but felt the off-road would be
faster). After getting helmets and harnessed into the
car and getting instructions on how to drive in sand,
they take off. As they have fun bouncing around the
dunes, Team Bowling Moms arrive and get strapped in. The
Married parents are concerned about the fact that they
only have $15 U.S. and the cab meter is reading "82.50".
Chip hopes that the meter reads in Dubai currency (the
Dirham) and not U.S. dollars. After giving him all their
money, they are still $10 short... but the cabbie waives
the $10, getting a hug from Chip. What do you know?
Things DID come back to him... for now, anyway.
Karen has issues with Linda driving, certain she'll flip
them over. But, nevertheless, they take off as Chip &
Kim start to get strapped in and tail right behind. To
her credit, Linda DOESN'T flip them over... but she DOES
go off course and gets them stuck in a dune. Chip & Kim
pass them by (with Kim being a "passenger-seat driver")
as Linda tries all she can to get them out of the dune.
She finally gets out in reverse and follows the tracks.
Meanwhile, 10,000 feet above the trucks, Brandon &
Nicole are ready to jump. The worst part was waiting for
the right jump point... and they could BARELY see Colin
& Christie's truck speeding around the flags. Brandon
finally jumps, followed closely by Nicole. It's a race
between jumpers and drivers to see who gets to the Route
And the winner is...
Team Type A... by a NARROW margin! They reach the
clue JUST before the Models were touching down.
PIT STOP: Take a camel
nearby, a GPS tracking system and a guide. Using the
GPS (set to the right location) direct the guide and
ride to the next PIT STOP: El Sarab Arabian Desert
Oasis (about a half-mile away). The arrow on the GPS
will always point towards the direction you need to
travel. WARNING: the last team to arrive may be
Colin knows how to
operate a GPS, so they hop on a camel and take off just
as the Models touch down. Brandon takes the GPS as
Nicole calls the ride "freakier than skydiving".
Back at the Aeroclub, it's finally Kami & Karli's turn
to get on the plane and jump. They don't know if they're
screwed or not, but they stick to their guns. But
there's SOME salvation: Team Type A's truck knocked over
a flag on the off-road route... and Chip & Kim are
having a hard time finding it. Not only that, but Linda
gets HER truck stuck... AGAIN! THIS time, though,
reverse won't help; they'll need to be towed. So while
the Married Parents unintentionally backtrack and get
stuck themselves and Team Bowling Moms wait for the tow,
Kami & Karli leap out of the plane.
Meanwhile, two teams are going through the desert on
camels with no names. Brandon prompts their guide to
pick up the pace a bit, making the ride even more bumpy
than usual. He & Nicole are right behind Colin &
Christie as they head for...
PIT STOP: EL SARAB OASIS, OUTSIDE OF DUBAI, U.A.E.
Over the dune and onto the mat come Team Type A, who is
greeted by Phil and a nomad with a falcon. Phil says,
"Colin & Christie, you're team #1!" Despite their
problems with the law, they manage to get back on top
where they feel they belong! Not only that, but they get
a Caribbean vacation courtesy of AA.com after their Race
is over. Christie now admits she should not have blown
up at Colin back in Kenya and hopes to be less stressful
in the legs to come. Right behind them are the Models,
who come in second place mere minutes behind the lead.
Back in the dunes, Linda & Karen get towed out and get
back on track, hoping to re-pass Chip & Kim who are
still stuck in the sand. They get towed out, though,
just in time; the mothers are on their mother-loving
tailpipe as Twins fall from the sky. It's now a
THREE-way race to the final clue... and the Married
Parents come in first... er, third and grab their camel
and GPS. Team Bowling Moms are right behind... and Team
Twins feel they made a crucial mistake in missing the
turn into the airport. Chip & Kim arrive at the PIT STOP
in third, leaving a battle of the lady teams. And the
winner in a foot race is... Team Bowling Moms!
So Kami & Karli arrive at the PIT STOP in the same place
they were when they started the leg yesterday: in last.
Now the GOOD news: this is the second of four
non-elimination legs, so they're still in the Race. Now
the BAD news: just like Linda & Karen had to do back in
Egypt, the sisters must fork over all their cash. Now
the WORSE news: they can't exactly beg for money in the
middle of a desert like the moms did in Giza. But they
already have a plan: to lie and be resourceful... and to
become the first all-female team to win the Amazing
(Forgive me, Kami & Karli, if I fail to hold the
carbon-dioxide-laden air in my lungs until that