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The Celebrity Apprentice
Season 3
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Previous Episodes
 

Sixteen celebrities are chosen by the most powerful name in real estate to play out the ultimate job interview for charity.


Recaps by Eric Pierce, GSNN
 
Host Donald Trump
VO Joe Cipriano
Judges Donald Trump Jr.
Ivanka Trump
Creator Mark Burnett
EP Mark Burnett
Donald J. Trump
Jay Bienstock
Packager Trump Entertainment LLC & Mark Burnett Productions
Origins Trump Tower, NYC
Web nbc.com/apprentice 
Airs 9p ET Sun, NBC
Available In High-Definition Where AvailableStreaming Online

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Week One
March 14

Can you believe it is back. The Celebrity Apprentice has returned and along with it comes the Donald’s grand coiffure.

More importantly, if you are interested in being on the next season of the actual Apprentice (apparently regular people need jobs too, who knew?), casting is happening now! Head on over to NBC.com for the details.

This season, things are both old and new.

As in seasons of old it will be men against women, but in a completely new wrinkle, the teams will be selecting project managers for the opposing team.

Trump sends the teams back to the loft to pick PMs and Team Names, and here are the results.

The women name themselves - Tenacity

And BTW, the women this season are:

Carol Leifer - Writer/Comedian
Sharon Osbourne - Rock Manager/Reality Star
Summer Sanders - Olympian
Selita Ebanks - Model
Holly Robinson-Peete - Actress
Maria Kanellis - WWE Wrestling Diva
Cyndi Lauper - Singer

They select Bret Michaels as the Men’s project manager. (partially because he has had a lack of sleep, but mostly because his claim to fame is being a VH1 man-whore).

Speaking of the Men, they named themselves - RockSolid

And the men this season are:

Bill Goldberg - Actor/Wrestler
Curtis Stone - Celebrity Chef
Darryl Strawberry - Baseball Star
Bret Michaels - Rock Star/Reality Star
Michael Johnson - Olympian
Rod Blagojevich - Former Illinois governor
Sinbad - Comedian

And the men chose Cyndi Lauper as Tenacity’s PM.

Task #1:

Each team will run a diner. The team that earns the most in proceeds and tips will win all of the money from both diner’s for their PM’s charity and of course one member from the losing team will be fired.

And The Donald’s trigger finger is itchy, he hasn’t gotten to fire anyone since Annie Duke last season. Then again, Annie just won the National Heads-up Poker Championship which will soon air on NBC, so she may have the last laugh.

The teams select locations and the task is on.

Here’s what you need to know, minus the bloating and the 42 minutes of commercials.

Bret Michaels has thanked the heavens for having Curtis Stone on RockSolid. Curtis (who is pulling double duty appearing both here and on The Biggest Loser) will probably have to make apologies to his charity after this. His advantage is ridiculous and should the men win, Curtis’ charity won’t see a cent because he isn’t PM.

As for the women of Tenacity, Cyndi is a liked leader, but she is clearly being very passive. Holly takes over the menu, Selita decides she will be the chef (Victoria’s secret models cook and eat?) Most unsurprisingly, Sharon and Carol both think the majority of women are idiots and Sharon in particular abuses her street smarts, snagging a paparazzo for their marketing efforts.

Rod Blagojevich look at his job as a waiter as being another way to give back to the people. He says he was once the governor of “the 5th largest state in America”. If you like him, let that slide and realize he means by population, if you don’t like, him, begin listing bigger states than Illinois now.

The Philosophical Divide:

The women go for high volume and low prices (read $20 meals), while the men go for high prices and exclusivity (read $100/plate and truffle risotto for $250)

The Drama:

Tenacity, much like a baby trapped in a bag of feral cats, has issues. Holy keeps acting like she is the PM, and spends her time bossing Carol, in and out of the restaurant. First, it’s help us serve food behind the counter, then it’s get outside and help us get more butts in seats.

Further, Cyndi is a bit of a train wreck. She is singing with an accordion player one second (wacky, but she has still got it), and then she can’t talk when Donald Jr comes to inspect things.

RockSolid had no real problems as a team. Rod Blagojevich did not know how to turn the politician switch off, but that didn’t cause a huge injury…
And then Joan Rivers had to get involved. The Donald turned Joan into a super spy and sent her to both restaurants to pick her favorite and award them a $10,000 prize. More on that later.

The diners close their doors and it’s time for the boardroom.

The ladies can’t pick a weak link from their team. The men preach team unity. Both teams believe they won.

Trump Jr. announces that Joan was a spy and Cyndi is flabbergasted. Regardless, Joan preferred the women as their prices were friendly and her food wasn’t served to her cold.

The cold food is a knock on Blagojevich who left Joan burger at the pass while he preached his innocence to customers. Oops.

Let’s see the totals.

Tencaity: $29,559 + $10,000 from Joan
RockSolid: $57,905

And ladies and gentlemen, this is what we call an old fashioned drubbing. The Donald had warned Curtis that if he lost that this would reflect badly on him, but now Mr. Stone has nothing to worry about.

The only people worrying will be the ladies.

The men retire to the loft to watch the proceedings and the women begin… the love fest?

There are no barbs being thrown. No one wants to place blame. Donald, Donald Jr., and Ivanka quiz them on service, price point, leaving donors on the street, etc. The only answers the women have is that they all worked really hard together as a team and while there may be some things that could have been improved, no one deserves to take a bullet for this loss.

Someone needs to explain to these ladies how reality TV works. People gets fired, voted off and eliminated. It’s why we watch. And as for Selita’s comment that in the end this is about raising money for charity…BZZZ!!!! Wrong! It’s about winning. 1. Because if it was just about money for charity, the Donald has more than enough money to make a donation and 2. This is on NBC.

Donald picks on each woman individually asking who should be fired and after asking half the team, Donald blows a gasket asking why no one can answer the G-D-F question. (you can figure out what G-D-F stands for…)

He finally asks Sharon Osbourne and she says Carol Leifer. Holly was willing to suggest that she had to manage Carol a bit, but would not go as far as to say that she should be fired.

Carol briefly defends herself saying that she did a good job as a barker getting people in the front door and that the team would need her as more creative and writing tasks came along.

Umm… Carol? Let me make a better defense for you. Who the hell is Holly telling you to come in and out of the restaurant. She’s not the PM, thus she is overstepping her bounds. Mind you she would not have had to overstep her bounds if Cyndi was mentally present, but Cyndi is ineffective at making decisions. Everyone else solely had the responsibility of running the diner, but without you no one would have been sitting in their seat. And sure, some big donors were left outside, but how are you supposed to know who Holly’s donors are? Holly wanted you to surf the line and find them, when the smart thing (and faster thing) would have been for you to take over the register and then she could run out and escort them inside in 60 seconds flat. Rant over.

Seriously, if I ever get into that boardroom folks, watch out.

Cyndi, uninfluenced by my rant, was asked to choose 2 people to come back into the boardroom. She can’t pick (told you she wasn’t mentally present). She looks as if she is going to cry and The Donald agrees to keep everyone in front of the firing squad instead.

Umm… ladies. This is when you yell at your PM for not making any of you safe. 5 of you could be in the loft drinking right now and instead an off breeze or an awkward fart could send you home lickety-split. Thanks Cyndi. Your “True Colors” are shining through.

Oh, and speaking of true colors, you should know Cyndi claimed she could not get a big donation because her donor did not like The Donald very much. That donor was Rosie O’Donnell. Trump made it clear in the boardroom that if Cyndi was friends with Rosie that he and Cyndi did not need to talk after this Apprentice was over.

And yet, Carol, You’re Fired!

It’s a strange world in that Apprentice boardroom, but it is clear, the ladies of Tencaity will have to step their game up if they want to win.

To see this episode in its entirety, visit the official website at www.nbc.com/the-celebrity-apprentice.