The Numbers Game Awards -
Its the end of the year, and what a year it was. Youre
going to hear about it this weekend when (after a weeks
delay) WLTI has its year-end special released, but as a
prelude to that, and as a break from the numbers, we
have a little award show to whet your appetite. How did
we decide upon these? Well, first I did a little
musing... while drinking. Then I came up with winners...
As with all award ceremonies, feel free to agree or
disagree, but this is simply what I think. Here now...
the first annual Numerals!
Best use of an import: obviously, that goes to Deal or
No Deal. NBC made a bold move in stripping the show for
a weeklong event television strand and then building
some serious hype around it. It paid off big time, as
this show will be seeing the light of day in the new
year. Hopefully, this show has its great years ahead of
it. Honorable mentions: Discoverys Cash Cab, Comedy
Centrals Distraction, and Food Networks Iron Chef
Worst use of an import: CBS Fire Me Please. Its good
to see Dave Holmes, surely one of the genres most
underestimated emcees of our generation, working again.
But on this? Youre kidding me, right? Not only was it
one of the summers critical laments, but viewership
fell off almost from day one. Not only that, but the
game actually repeated one of its rounds during its
final episode. Thats a b(^_^) ass move, BBC...
Best new original domestic show: VH1s Game Show
Moments Gone Bananas. Game show clips, Ben Stein,
audiences made into contestants. How could you not like
this show? Honorable mention: MTVs Score. Who knew
that Ryan Cabrera could pass as a game show host?
Worst new original domestic show: ABCs My Kind of
Town. As much as we like to see winning around here,
theres such a thing as standard. An in-joke is only
good if everyone is in on it. Dishonorable mention:
MTVs The Reality Show. It cancels mini-shows, and
then gets cancelled. How ironic is that?
Best player of the year: Carrie Bailey, a good friend of
ours who was darn near close to having the entire Game
Show Congress delegation storm the Bob Barker Studio
stage on our episode of The Price is Right. Honorable
mention: Michelynne McGuire, who found time after her
appearance of Street Smarts to win The Starlet.
Worst player of the year: Ricardo Medina, Jr. of Kept.
One foul swoop, and a former Red Ranger is now the
reality star youd most likely like to have a Megazord
Best foreign show we havent seen yet: Temptation: The
New Sale of the Century. Wouldve been Deal or No
Deal, but NBC had to go and put it on the air...
Worst foreign show we havent seen yet: ... theres a
worst? Well have to revisit this one.
Best cancellation: Whos Your Daddy? and The
Apprentice: Martha Stewart among others.
Worst cancellation: tapings of Trato Hecho.
Best read related to a game show: The Ultimate TV Game
Show Book by our good friends Steve Ryan and Fred
Wostbrock. Good book, guys! Im still waiting on
EOTVGS4, though. Bonus points to Sonia Lai for sending
me a copy. You rock!
Worst read related to a game show: Rob Marianos
statement that the end of the seventh Amazing Race was
a bit more than what actually happened. I mean, some
things may have happened that benefited one team over
another, but the bottom line is that there are just some
elements of the race that you cant control. But kudos
to Rob for at least moving on from that.
Best live show: Whats My Line? Live at the Acme
Theatre in Los Angeles. Especially the show we saw. J.
Keith and the panel (Andy Zax, Teresa Strasser, Frank
Nicotero, and Teresa Ganzel) were just amazing. And the
Jeopardy! segment? Gosh, guys... How did you know we
were going to be in the crowd? I guess the pamphlet in
the program had something to do with it.
Worst live show: Fact in the Head by Lip Service and
Where in Time is Carmen Sandiego? creator Jamie
Greenberg. From what we hear, it wasnt a parody of game
shows... just the really BAD ones. Dishonorable
mentions: The Apprentice third season and The
Apprentice: Martha Stewart finales.
Best pickup line: Weve just bought the rights to Game
Show Marathon, and were renewing Survivor and Big
Worst pickup line: "My heart rate shot up instantly. I'm
breaking out in hives! And then with all the excitement,
I decided that in addition to taking an antihistamine,
I'd probably need a topical analgesic as well." -Arthur
Apicella, Average Joe 4
Best geek: Richard Rubin, Beauty and the Geek.
Worst geek: Anna Chudoba... sure, the Average Joes good
for you after a makeover...
Best recasting: Courtney Friel, the new World Poker
Worst recasting: Shandi Finnessey, the new Lingo
Best comeback: Survivors Stephenie LaGrossa and Bobby
Worst comeback: The Real Gilligans Island, season 2.
Best big win: a tie between Teresa Lee (Street Smarts)
and Uchenna & Joyce Agu (The Amazing Race)
Worst big win: a tie between Brad Rutter (Jeopardy!)
and Carrie Underwood (American Idol). The wins
themselves werent that bad per se, but Brads dominance
of the Ultimate Tournament took out any drama that the
show had, and Carrie... Carrie was just bad compared to
Best moves: GSN, for bringing some thought back into
their schedule. The daytime classics are good watching,
and the first go-around of all of The Amazing Race
seasons was a pleasant surprise. And original shows were
also plusses with Ballbreakers, Lingo, and Poker
Royale, not to mention the upcoming Ive Got a Secret
with promise according to people who were at tapings.
Honorable mention: Kelly Monaco, John OHurley, and
everyone else who participated in Dancing with the
Worst moves: ABC, for milking what class Dancing with
the Stars had left with an inane and redundant
dance-off show. Dishonorable mention: Bai Ling, Michael
Copon, and everyone else who participated in But Can
Best game show parody: Take on Orbitz, a series of
spots for the internet travel agency featuring none
other than Wink Martindale... well, doing what he does
Worst game show parody: the Dating Game-esque Are You
the One? on a recent Taco Bell commercial.
Best use of a billionaires resources for a game show: a
tie between Donald Trump for The Apprentice and Sir
Richard Branson for The Rebel Billionaire. Both shows
were backed by the hosts production company.
Worst use of a billionaires resources for a game show:
Kathy Hilton for I Want to Be a Hilton. Need we say
In awards given out earlier this evening... best
TV-to-movie adaptation of the year: Serenity. Best
non-game-show strand of television: Cartoon Networks
Adult Swim. Best dinner: any one of the
26 burgers on hand at Ruby Tuesday. Best foreign show
imported to American television: G4/Sky Ones Brainiac:
Science Abuse. Best new series: a tie between The
Colbert Report and The Boondocks. Best new anime: Planetes.
Best undiscovered singing talent: James Blunt. Best
waste of time: bowling. Best Johnny Cash biopic: Walk
And finally, the best game show fans in the world: count
yourself among them! The Numbers Game continues into the
new year, and Id be delighted to have you play along.
And if you want to talk about these results, I'd love to
hear from you. Have a great 2006!
Chico Alexander would like to take this time to ask
Michelynne to be his New Years Eve date. E-mail him at