Love to Interrupt
The DiGeorge Files
It ain't your father's Olympics
as four fake fraternities and sororities fight for a shot at a
real trip to the Greek island of Mykonos.
Recaps by Gordon Pepper, GSNN
Host: George Gray
Commentators: Petros Papadakis, Daphne Brogdon
EP: Mark Cronin, James Rowley
Packager: Mindless Entertainment, National Lampoon
Productions, GSN Originals
Airs: Tuesdays at 11:00pm ET on GSN
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Episode 2 - July 20
There was action to satisfy people who wanted to see hot
chicks, and as for good games...well, there was action
to satisfy people who wanted to see hot chicks. Welcome
to Part 2 of the competition. Here are the results after
round 1 -
Deltas - 16
Nasty Boys - 7
Zits - 7
Alphas - 6
Goths - 11
Ingas - 8
Kuties - 6
Buxoms - 4
We have such lovely events as the dance and dive, the
marshmallow run, the surf girl challenge, the baklava
challenge, and the burping challenge. Sound enthused? Me
neither, but I have to recap this, so here we go.
We start with the male dance and dive. They get to dance
and then dive. Like the insult and belly flop, they get
judged on the dancing and the diving. The Nasties start
- and the double somersault was nice enough for 28
points. The Alphas strip tease to the tightey-whiteys
and then dives - but he comes up short...er... a point
at 27. The Deltas flips on both the board and the air -
and that also gets him a 28. The Zits do their best
Screech impersonation en route to a...29. Wha? George -
"What's next? A plague of locusts?"
The women are next. The ingas start off with a J-Lo
rendition, which only gets her a 22. The Buxom woman
slaps her butt and dives backwards - and that gets her a
26. The Goths do a 'Tied to the Tracks' vaudeville
number to a belly flop of her own - and the dance
impression impresses them with a 27. Can the Kuties win
it with a Charlie Chaplin impersonation? No - but she
can tie it, as they share the gold.
We get another profile - this time a Love Profile
between Diana of the Kuties and Jader of the Nasty Boys.
Sigh. We get a mock food fight as the love birds
continue. Let's move on to...
A sickening urine challenge sketch. Can we go back to
the love scene? Please?
Next up - the tog-a-war. Gold goes to the Alphas/Buxoms,
Silver to the Deltas/Kuties and Bronze to the Nasty Boyz/Goths.
Then we have the burping contest. The contestants have 3
minutes to get the best burp - and only the best score
will count. Jader starts for the Nasties - and maybe his
mind is on love after all - he gets a weak 16 point
belch. The Alphas are even lamer with 8 points. The
Zits, who can talk and burp at the same time, gets 22,
and the Deltas get 27. Second round - and Jader burps -
and barfs - along with pure visual glory with
alternating brown and clear liquid. Gross, gross, gross
- but gets him a 26. The Deltas improve to a 29, but the
Zits hold their burp for a good 15 seconds, which gets
him a perfect 30 and the match.
Just when you think it couldn't get worse, we get the
marshmallow run. The women get to stick 5 marshmallows
in their armpits and 5 in their pants. They then have to
run the race and eat one marshmallow from their armpit -
and one that was in their nether regions. What exactly
were the producers on when they were creating this? To
make a long recap short, the Kuties come in first, then
the Buxoms, then the Ingas.
We interrupt the competition to get a profile on how to
look like a Goth girl. It's as funny as it sounds. Go
Pale! Go Frightening! Go Goth! What will happen if they
win the trip and go to a (gasp!) hot island and have a
chance to be tan? Oh, the horror...
Next up - the surf girl challenge. This sounds promising
- the girl has to change from clothes to swimsuit -
using only a towel. I can't wait to see the look on
Steve Beverly's face when they are talking about this.
This could have been very tasteless, but the women know
what they are doing and it is fine. Well, it's fine for
the people who remember to bring their clothes with
them, but both the Kuties and the Goth chicks are
disqualified. The Ingas come in first, with the Buxoms
The pool antics continue with the granny race - the
women swim to one side to grab the granny clothing -
which the guys are wearing. They then switch clothes and
the women have to swim to the other side. The Kuties/Deltas
once again take first, followed by the Goths/Nasties and
Pool Party Part 3 - Geek Tossing. Two guys from each
fraternity throw a geek for distance. This geek looks
surprisingly like Michael Pipkin, from the Stallion
Battalion. Well, that's what you get for finishing in
7th in an 8 team league and getting swept out of the
quarterfinals. The Delta's 14' beat the Zits 10' 7", The
Nasties go for 11' and the Alphas go for 10' 4". The
Deltas win this won - just like they've won almost every
That was the last men's event. The last women's event?
The human baklava contest. The women have to cover
themselves in syrup, roll over in nuts, and then stuff
bread in their bra and panties. The woman who gets the
most weight gain wins. Is this tasteless? Absolutely.
Will I be enjoying this? Absolutely. The Ingas move to
5.8 pounds, which beats the Kuties 4.1. The Buxoms get
6.1 pounds, which is what the Goths need to win. They
do, as they get 7.3 pounds. To conclude the
tastelessness, Petros eats the bread from the Kuties
bikini. To conclude the tastelessness from George's
angle, we get slow-mo video of the women washing
themselves off. Nice.
We get a recap and a highlight reel of the past 2
episodes. After that, Dr Pluto comes back announces that
the winning fraternity is the... Delta Dogs!, and the
winning sorority is the... Goth Girls! Pluto
extinguishes the flaming cheese as everyone drop into
Final Standings -
Deltas - 35
Nasty Boys - 18
Zits - 18
Alphas - 12
Goths - 25
Kuties - 24
Buxoms - 20
Ingas - 15
We end this debacle by seeing Fattacus's big ass, the
judges partying, and the Goths smashing plates on their
head. Nice. Fade to credits.
My take? Easily, the worst piece of dreck that I have
seen this year. I really hope that George Gray was paid
well for this one - or maybe he was so hard-up for cash
that he had to take it. Chico owes me for taking this
one. There is nothing redeeming, either game-wise or
taste-wise, for this, and this easily earns my first F
of the year.
If this doesn't air another new episode, then good
riddance. If it does, then I'll be back to savage it