"Meet the Bachelor(s)..." -
With all of the good, is
the bad. With all of the Yom Kippur brisket, there is
the massive stomach ache. With all of the good shows,
there has to be a turkey here somewhere...
Though I get to cover America's Next Top Model, I ALSO
have to cover... The Bachelor.
(C-Note: One more peep, and
I'm giving you another audition show.)
If you haven't figured it out already, I DESPISE this
Where do I start? You have bad editing, bad
story-telling, the woman that you never hear from wins
the heart of the Bachelor, and since the guy is much
more interested in fame than love, they split up a few
months later. Yuck.
However, Chico has threatened me with a visit from Jase
and Holly, so I have to do it. Oh, the agony.
We start off with a quick blurb, and then we are taken
to a mansion in California. Chris Harrison is back, who
has said that there has been many things in the Bachelor
family - including Trista and Ryan's wedding (well, that
was the Bachelorette, not the Bachelor). Since the
Bachelor has been 0-5 in producing marriages, there are
some new rules. Rule #1 - When everything is over, the
bachelor will either propose marriage - or he'll walk
away alone - no mamby-pamby fence sitting this time
around. #2 - There will now be TWO Bachelors, not one,
who will be competing for 25 ladies. For the first
episode, it will be the ladies deciding who will stay -
and who will go. The Bachelor 6 - meet For Love or Money
4. For Love or Money 4, Meet The Bachelor 6.
Let's meet the guys. Guy #1 is Byron. Guy #2 is Jay.
This is a fake setup as the two guys walk towards each
other and I hate this show already. The guys walk into a
mansion where all of the women will be inhabiting. Byron
insists that Jay will not take his woman from him, and
Jay is impressed with Byron, but Jay never bets against
The guys sit together in a VCR room, where they see info
about the other person. Byron, a blond tan guy in his
early 40's who looks like a retired surfer dude, is a
professional Bassmaster and was born and raised in
Huntington Beach. He loved fishing with his dad, but
their parents got divorced when he was 10. When he
graduated from California, he went into fishing and has
won the Bassmaster U.S. Open Twice. In addition, he is
in the Top 5 money winners of all time.
Mike, Byron's friend, says that he is a normal guy who
will probably find love in the group. Mike says that
Byron is looking, as Byron had a wife, but was divorced
because his wife preferred Vegas over him. Byron wants
the unification of 2 souls.
Here is guy #2 - Jay Overby, who has short cropped black
hair that is graying on the sides. He sold his computer
business in Chicago in 2002, and then he moved to real
estate in NYC. He has been successful there too, and he
wants to take the success in the love scene, He was born
in Ridgewood, NJ, as part of 7 siblings. He went to prep
school in New England, and he was 25 when his dad passed
away, and he swore to take care of himself, so he
wouldn't die prematurely.
Jay likes to play golf, and his brother Mike says that
if he can't pick one of 25 women, then he should retire
from that field. He loves his family, and they are
convinced that he will find the next woman in The
Chris takes both guys to see all of the pictures of the
women. In addition, both guys will be able to see all of
the women enter the mansion via closed-circuit TV. Byron
seems assured that he can get the girls to like him,
while Jay is very intimidated.
As the guys are looking on, the women's limousines
arrive and the women come out. Chris tells the women
that all 25 of them will be moving in today - and this
is the first time that they will all move in together
before meeting the Bachelor. The women eye the mansion
as one of them brings a dog with them. It's time to...
yep, you guessed it... meet the Bachelorettes!
#1 - Cherisse (31, Advertising Director, St.
Louis, MO) - a long, brown haired women who thinks men
think she is intimidating and unapproachable. Both men
find her gorgeous, and she looks like a keeper.
#2 - Cynthia (37, Charity Director, Hermosa
Beach, CA) - a blond haired woman (same length as
Cherisse) describes herself as a ripe fruit and is ready
to come off the vine.
#3 - Amanda (27, Cosmetics Buyer, NY, NY) - Long
black haired lady who hasn't found the right guy
#4 - Carolyn (36, FInancial Advisor, Tulsa, OK) -
Short brown haired lady who claims she has good life
experiences and her Southern values may give her an
edge. We'll see...
#5 - Amy (27, Marketing Coordinator, San Diego,
CA) - Short cropped blonde who 'escaped' from the dating
cesspool and who wants a commitment.
#6 - Wende (28, Model, Austin, TX) - She has
reddish-brown bouncy hair and describes herself as a
wild-ass woman. Both guys likes her - but she is one of
the most jealous women you will ever meet. THis has
potential personality disorder written all over her.
#7 - Lisa (33, Teacher, West Palm Beach, FL) -
Light blonde women who says that if the chemistry is
right, she'll fall in love within three minutes. Lisa,
#8 - Kristie (32, Bar Owner, Windsor, Canada) -
Another brunette with shoulder length hair, she says
that listening to people talk about their relationships
in the bar has taught her a lot. She can be a girl - or
a guy and watch football all day. Look Ryan! A real-live
Canadian on an American show!
#9 - Andrea (33, Dental Hygienist, Denver, CO)
gets a little teary-eyed when she thinks about love. She
has 8 yards of silk and is ready to make this happen.
#10 - Nicole (28, Headhunter, Libertyvill IL)
steals people from jobs as a profession. She looks like
a cross between Pamela (the contestant) and Carolyn (the
Donald's helper) from The Apprentice. She wants to steal
the guy as well.
#11 - Kerry (31, Nurse, San Francisco, CA) has
looooong flowing brown hair and is a romantic gypsy,
waiting for the right person to tie her down.
#12 - Jayne (37, Dog Groomer, Key Largo, FL), is
on the shy side as her and her long shoulder-length
brown hair doesn't get asked out much, In a show when
you have to be open, being shy is NOT a good thing...
but both guys find her beautiful, which has to be a good
#13 - Krysta (28, Financial Analyst, Oklahoma
City, OK) can't settle for a guy who can't handle her.
This women, who looks like Toni from Paradise Hotel
around 100 pounds lighter, must have someone who will
wine her and dine her. 'The attitude is - all's fair in
love and war.' Ok everyone, let's all say it together -
We have found the resident BITCH!
#14 - Leina (28, Advertising Executive, Chula
Vista, CA) wants to have 4 kids and is battling the
clock. She is a black-haired Polynesian, and Jay says
that she looked like someone who he used to date. Oops.
#15 - Tanya (31, Special Ed. Teacher, Plano, TX)
has gone through lack of dating spurts as she has gotten
older. She feels like there is nothing going on in her
life - so she came here.
#16 - Elizabeth (28, Pharmaceutical Sales,
Chicago, Il) is looking for someone who is confident and
who can be her strength. In the words of Aldo, we have
found the minority woman who will survive the first cut
and not the second, which is the norm for all of the
women in the Bachelor series.
#17 - Alma (35, Cafe' Owner, Aurora, OH) has
wanted to get married, but she has some terrible luck
when it comes to getting a man. She hopes that God has
picked her for this. Uhhhhh. Ok.
#18 - Kristin (27, Office Manager, Pensicola,
FL), a cute blonde version of Adria without the Southern
accent, just bought a house and got 2 puppies, so
finding a man on this has NATURALLY got to be the next
progression in her life, right?
#19 - Jennifer (31, Account Executive, Seattle,
WA), a bright blonde haired lady, says her lips are her
breast..I mean BEST feature. You can see that I beg to
differ - and so does the camera person, who pans in on
#20 - Abby (29, Acrobat, Henderson, NV) who looks
like a young Sissy Spacek, likes to keep her job a
secret, because then met usually follow up with
inappropriate questions. Heh.
#21 - Natalie (34, Writer, Santa Monica, CA), has
a lot of love in her heart and is very romantic. She
wants to be a part of something special and I think she
is sticking around for a while.
#22 - Melinda (39, Photographer, Nashville, TN)
reminds me very much of Stacy from Who Wants to Marry My
Dad 2. She says that she hasn't been in a spot where she
had to fight for her love, but if he was Mr. Right,
she'd step it up a few notches to get him. 'Watch out,
girls!' she says with a laugh. Foreshadowing?
#23 - Susie (32, Insurance Broker, Hollywood, CA)
has decided that now is the time to look for love, as
this blonde Asian woman hasn't had a chance to had a
chance to focus on her personal life.
#24 - Ashley (31, Teacher, Santa Barbara, CA) has
been married before, but this brownish/blondish woman
wants to try it again.
#25 - Kelly (34, Actress, Beverly Hills, CA) is
the proud owner of a 4 month old bulldog, and insists
that the Bachelor HAS to like dogs, or the
high-maintenance brown/blonde is out of there rather
quickly. Maybe quicker than planned, if that dog isn't
house-trained. The guys think she is beautiful - but we
don't know if they are referring to the girl or the dog.
Both of the guys think the women are stunning. The women
think about the men... in their imagination, because
they still haven't seen them as they are sunning by the
pool. Kelly brings the dog to the pool, while Krysta,
who doesn't like dogs, is thinking about drop kicking
Bobo (the dog) into the pool.
Chris comes to meet the women, and tells them that they
are about to meet the Bachelor right now. Much to the
women's dismay, they aren't ready to be seen, and when
Jay comes out, he gets some warm applause. Lisa thought
he looked like an older Richard Gere. Chris tells them
that there is one more person to meet - and Byron comes
out. Chris says that there are two Bachelors, and we get
more applause and laughter. Cynthia thinks that Byron is
hot. Chris tells the women that they will be handing out
the roses at the Ladies Choice Rose Ceremony - and the
women squeal for joy. The joys turn to awwws when Chris
tells them that whoever the women don't pick is gone.
Chris also tells the women that the guys have been
spying on them all day, and that also gets some of the
The men get to mingle with the ladies and Byron calls
Cynthia the wrong name - 3 times. The men tell their
stories and Kelly say the men are complete opposites -
Byron is the strong rugged type, while Jay is the solid
successful city guy. Andrea thinks that because of their
age, they are more sincere in getting married. Jay is
asked about his hobbies - and he loves to travel
internationally. He admits that he is looking for a city
woman, while Byron doesn't want a city woman. Byron
thinks he has an edge because he is more real - and it
seems like it as Jay says that he has to sell himself to
the ladies. Well, that's not a way to attract chicks.
Kelly chats a lot with Jay - which irks Krysta, who
wants to spend one on one time with him. Kelly may be
getting drop-kicked into the pool right after Bobo.
The women seem split on this - and some of the women are
looking for qualities of both of them combined. Uh-oh.
Byron comes over to talk to Cheresse and her crew, and
he says that he has been married before. He said that
his lady was youthful - and he adds that marriage under
the age of 28 should be illegal. Well, that was sort of
bad, as that gets spread around very quickly and the
younger women are murmuring.
Meanwhile, Krysta finally gets some alone time - with
Jay. Krysta is leaning towards Jay - unless Byron has
some family money, since she doesn't think that
fishermen make much. Nice. She says that she will
campaign for Jay in the house, and we wonder if we have
our first intergender Bachelor alliance.
Wende, who's 28, thinks she has a connection with Byron
(despite the age), while Cynthia gets to connect with
Jay. He says that he wants to have kids within a year
and a half with kids, and Cynthia is torn. Her mind -
Jay, her heart - Byron, who wants to have the woman that
he would find sexy at 70. Byron is asked if he would
marry someone who didn't want kids, and he said yes,
adding that he wouldn't give away the perfect woman for
that. Jay said that he had to marry a woman who wanted
kids, and that could be just as damning as Byron's
statement that he didn't want anyone under 28.
Both Jay and Byron think that they did as well as they
could as the sun is setting. Darkness hits, and the
women are still chatting about their potential choice.
Krysta, as promised, is campaigning for Jay, while the
older women are leaning towards the more fun Byron. The
men, on the other hand are wondering who they will pick.
Byron wonders if it's a lifestyle issue, while Jay
wonders what the girls are thinking about.
The next scene is Chris telling the women that there is
a platter of white and yellow roses. A woman will take a
rose (white for Byron, yellow for Jay) and place it in
front of the box of the man they want to e The Bachelor.
Whoever gets the most roses stays.
We get the final appeals by the guys. Jay in a very
rehearsed speech, says that he wants to find his
lifetime love and that he'd be honored to be the
Bachelor. Byron, on the other hand, thinks the ladies
look beautiful and is looking for someone to spend the
rest of his life with. He thanks the ladies for giving
him a chance and he hopes he is with them at the end of
the night. Jay's speech was borderline clinical, while
Byron's really seemed heartfelt. Point to Byron.
Chris has the men turn around, so they can't see who is
voting for - or against - them. He tells the women to
follow their heart - and they begin. We don't see all of
the votes, but we see Leina (Jay), Ashley (Byron),
Elizabeth (Jay), Cherisse (Byron), Tanya (Jay), and
Time to tally the votes. 13 roses wins. The first rose
goes to... Byron. Jay gets the next one. The roses then
go to, in order, Jay, Byron, Jay, Jay, Byron, Byron (4-4
Tie at this point), Byron, Byron, Byron, Jay, Byron,
Jay, Byron, Jay, Byron (Byron up, 10-7 at this point),
Byron, Byron (who is now at 12 - Jay needs the rest). He
doesn't get it. Byron gets the 13th rose and wins, 18-7.
Jay leaves and he isn't happy. "I'm not accustomed to
losing... when you go back and you can't help but see
the difference of lifestyle, it could simply be that
they just weren't into my personality. There was some
consolation knowing that there were some women that were
very interested in me. At the same time, it's sad,
because I'm no longer there. I'm gone. I'm out of the
picture." Don't you get that feeling that this isn't the
last time we've seen Jay?
Byron is hoping that right in front of him is the woman
that he'll spend the rest of his life with. Right now,
he is nervous, because it's now his time to eliminate
the women. The first rose ceremony is tonight. The women
asked each other who they voted for, and they all say
Byron. Yeah, like anyone will admit now that they voted
for Jay. Oh wait - Krysta did - but she also thought
that Byron was a nice guy, and she is afraid that the
women will use the vote against her. Elizabeth also
voted for Jay - and she is wondering if he will give
them a chance. Well, he doesn't know - unless people are
dumb enough to tell him...
The women start getting catty immediately, going after
Kristie and wondering how old she is. Krysta adds that
she has no clue how a guy would find her attractive.
Meow. Ryan Vickers, go defend her honor right now.
Krysta feels that she is younger and hipper and sees
herself getting a rose. Uh.. Krysta, those are the
qualities that I think he DOESN'T want.
The evening has arrived and the women joke that Byron is
firing 10 of them. Heh. Krysta repeats the 'All's Fair
and Love in War' mantra and slaps Kristin, who called
her a b!tch. Meeeeeoooooow.
Byron comes in and has a toast. He tells the women that
tonight is based on the merits of tonight, not on who
voted for who last night. Andrea, who is a romantic,
said that his words pierced her heart. Byron doesn't
know who is better - the ones he has met, or the ones he
hasn't. Krysta is the first woman to steal Byron, and
she tells him that she is very glad that he's here. Keep
in mind that she voted for Jay - and she admits that her
focus has shifted to Byron. Byron admits that she is a
firecracker and likes her aggressiveness - but maybe
it's a little harrowing. Uh oh...
Leina, who is Polynesian, give him a good luck lei.
Byron spends time with her - and with the reserved
Jayne. She finds him captivating, and he agrees, so she
seems like a keeper.
Some of the women are dancing with Elizabeth, while
others are listening to Byron talk about his usual day.
Andrea is spying on him, and she is falling in love with
him, adding that he has all of the qualities that she is
looking for. Kelly was impressed - but she doesn't get
it, while Andrea wants to make sure that she has her
time with him. So we have a beeeotch AND a potential
Byron wants more roses (don't we all), but he wants some
more one on one time. Cheresse is glad she got it,
because she says that if you don't put yourself out, you
don't deserve a rose. Cheresse is looking for a best
friend, someone who wants to keep the romance alive.
Byron says that she has the same hopes and dreams that
he does, and that seems like a match.
On the other hand, Jennifer wants a rose, but she isn't
being aggressive. Neither is Andrea, who has been
affected by him - nor Ashley. Krysta, who has had time
with Byron, decides to talk trash about Kristie, which
pisses off AMy to the point that they tell her to cut it
out. Krysta takes that as them turning on her, and she
lets them have it. "When people turn on me, I can be a
total b!tch." Nooooooooooooooo Reallllllllly? She goes
back and talks to Byron - and then trashes the ladies in
front of HIM.
Byron FINALLY gets time with Andrea, who says that she
has nothing to lose. She says that she is excited to be
around him. She splits a strawberry as a simile to her
heart opening and she thinks she made a connection.
Tanya gets to converse with Byron - and she was one of
the people who voted for Jay, but admits that she would
have voted for Byron had she have had the time that she
had now. I sense a conversion...
Byron is convinced that his soulmate is here -
somewhere. All of the women are concerned about their
chances and Byron admits that it isn't going to be easy.
After a quick stay upstairs, Byron comes back to the
women, who are organized for him. Chris reminds the
women that 7 of them voted against Byron, so if they get
a rose and don't want it, they should let him know
immediately. Byron says that the rose is an investment,
and if they don't accept it, to give it up so someone
else can have the opportunity. Getting roses are...
Cheresse, Wende (the wacky model), Tanya (who voted for
Jay), Leina (the Polynesian who also voted for Jay),
Kelly (with Bobo the dog), Jayne (the quiet one),
Natalie (Ms Romantic), Elizabeth (The African American,
who voted for Jay, and who, as the statistics say, makes
the FIRST cut), Krysta (BIIIIIOOOOOTCH who voted for
Jay), Amanda (who has love in her heart as a wolf howls
as she is called up to accept the rose), Kristie (Much
to the dismay of Krysta. Go Canadians!), Susie (WHO?),
Cynthia (WHO?), Ashley (Who apparently did get that One
on One conversation - but we didn't get to see it),
and.... Andrea (the romantic who was affected and who
could be a potential stalker). OUT - Amy, Melinda,
Carolyn, Lisa, Kerry, Alma (guess God wasn't on her
side), Nicole, Kristin, Jennifer and Abby.
The women leave, most of them teary-eyed. Lisa was
wondering why she didn't get a rose, while Melinda
thought she had a connection - but apparently not. On
the other hand, Byron thought that he selected the best
15 women, but everyone that we knew voted for Jay got
selected, so Byron may not be the greatest judge of
character...but no one cares right now, as Byron joins
everyone for a toast. End of show.
My take? Well, they are certainly trying to stack the
deck to make sure we get a relationship, so that I have
to give them props for. It's very noticeably that both
the Bachelors (in their early 40's) and the ladies (no
one younger than 27) are older then the norm. Now, can
they solve the problem of bad editing (you know, the one
where we learn about everything with one woman, when
it's the one that you don't know anything about that
wins)? If they can, then I may actually like this. Next
week, we'll find out if I like what I see on the second