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Entry 1: Drift Drivers/Acrobatics/Contortionist/Extreme Unicyclists - June 22

First, a disclaimer, quoting Richard Hammond of Brainiac: "The following experiments are dangerous. For your safety and the protection of those around you, do not try this at home...

"No, seriously. Don't."

Tonight, two drift drivers, an acrobat team, a contortionist, and two unicyclists all have one thing in common. They want to be... Master of Champions!

The show is hosted by Chris Leary, who you may (or may not) remember as host of "Fox Family Countdown" and "Fresh Gear" on G4 (back when it was watchable). He greets us with "There are masters... there are champions.... Welcome to 'MASTER OF CHAMPIONS!'" Not exactly the BEST opening sting, but what the hell.

The rules are simple. Each show will feature three rounds of competition, each one with a medal awarded to an expert in his/her own field. But only one will be called "Master of Champions" and be enshrined in the Wall of Masters on stage. Which one? That depends on the studio audience, who will be helped along by a "Panel of Champions", baseball legend Steve Garvey, Olympic gold medalist Oksana Baiul, and Olympic gold medalist (and host of at least one season of Real World/Road Rules Challenge) Jonny Moseley.

First up, two drifters will compete in a drift car challenge to determine who will be the best. Verena Mei, a former tires model and currently the best female drifters in America, will take on Tanner Foust, one of the best drifters in America.

Trivia: Drift racing involves a controlled skid on an asphalt surface. Examples can be seen on the TV series "Formula D" and in the movie "Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift."

Tonight, Verena & Tanner will be put to the ultimate test... cheese grating?

ROUND 1: DRIFT-CAR CHEESE GRATING: Verena Mei vs. Tanner Foust

Each driver will have to shred a 10-pound block of cheese by doing donuts around it. Whoever shreds the most cheese off of it at the end of 45 seconds wins.

Verena is first. She first makes contact at 15 seconds, but she has to stop at 30 before she loses control. She's back at 35, but the 10 seconds lost could be deadly. Better than a busted car, I suppose.

Starting weight: 9.49 pounds. Ending weight: 7.49 pounds. Verena's weight: 1.90 lbs.

Tanner is going to let the grater do his thing next. Tanner starts wide, the hones in with precision. And we have a fire at 29 seconds. He stops six seconds early, and the safety crew do that thing. Will it be enough to beat Verena?

Starting weight: 9.49 pounds. Ending weight: 5.62 pounds. Tanner's weight: 3.87 lbs.

But what say the Panel of Champions? Steve thinks that Verena is the face of the sport, but gives his vote to Tanner. Oksana, making light of her being "known" for fast driving, gives her vote to Verena. Jonny gives Tanner props for skill, but Verena gets the vote for more skill with less experience.

Now we go to the audience... By a vote of 75% to 25%, the best drift-driver is... TANNER!

Next, two acts with unique skills will go head to head in...

ROUND 2: UNIQUE SKILL ROUND: Acroback vs. Princess Elayne

Combining acrobatics, stilts, and breakdancing, Acroback have a combined 75 years experience, and tonight, they'll perform with spring-loaded stilts and strapped fireworks in an attempt to become "human fireworks."

Today, they will compete against Princess Elayne, a 14-year-old contortionist whose specialty is shooting arrows with her feet. Tonight, she'll perform a TV first, shooting arrows with her feet... blindfolded. ... Bullseye.

Going to the Panel. Steve goes to Princess Elayne. Oksana goes to Elayne... Jonny goes to Acroback.

The audience... By a vote of 70% to 30%, the most unique skill medal goes to... PRINCESS ELAYNE!

Next, two unicyclists go at it to determine who is the most extreme. Dan Heaton of Seattle, who started as a child and went on to become a world champion street unicyclist... then broke both of his feet, will take on 18-year-old Zach Baldwin, who went to Japan and placed first in their tournament.

ROUND 3: UNIRACERS: Dan Heaton vs. Zach Baldwin

On a specially designed street course, each unicyclist will show off their skills.

Dan is first. Remember, he's more of a street rider, which means you'll see more tricks. And also remember that Dan is still recovering from two broken feet. Dan gives it a good run, but he couldn't nail his big finish. He got the ramp no problem, but stepped off of his unicycle.

Zach is more of a trial style, which means expect more drops and more ramps. Zach struggles getting up on top of a 5 foot level hop onto a phone booth, but he manages to get himself up. His big finish is also mangled as he attempts an 8 foot drop. But he holds it together.

The Panel of Champions, in a 2-1 split, give it to Dan. But what will the audience say? It's a close one, but by a vote of 51% to 49%, the best extreme unicyclist.. by FOUR votes... is... ZACH!

All three medals have been awarded, but now a tough vote remains, as the Panel of Champions convenes to decide who will be tonight's Master of Champions. And their decision must be unanimous.

MASTER OF CHAMPIONS ROUND: Tanner Foust vs. Princess Elayne vs. Zach Baldwin.

Tonight, one of these three finalists will place their name on the Wall of Masters.

Steve congratulates the three... but reveals that uniqueness is key in this decision. Oksana says that when you're a champion, it's not an end, but a beginning. Jonny reveals tonight's winner.

Tonight's Master of Champions is.... PRINCESS ELAYNE! She is the first entry onto the Wall of Masters.

 

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