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Episode 7 - May 23
Time to wrap up a second season of PAIN, SHAME, and
INSANE, as 3 more guys compete in 3 more Sacrifices, and
those who manage to win along the way will move on to an
explosive Final. And for this season finale, the winner
will win an opportunity for his friend/relative to not
only train with, but also play on a minor league
baseball team, the El Paso Diablos, for one day!
As host George Gray appears to be driving a car around a
field in the intro, he does something that we haven't
seen in the past few episodes this season: warn the
viewers not to try any of this stuff. And he's serious.
Every challenge is supervised by trained professionals,
so unless you happen to be one, just sit back and watch,
and don't bother thinking about driving through a tower
or something like that.
So, who is willing to do anything, and who are they
doing anything for?
Luis Hernandez
From: Ponce, Puerto Rico
Competing for: Danny Hernandez (brother)
Al Roma
From: Beacon, NY
Competing for: Joe Montesano (best friend)
Brandon Smith
From: San Antonio, TX
Competing for: Jerred Green (friend)
Day 1 (PAIN): At Least it's Not a Soccer Riot
It's back to the same stadium where last week's Final
took place, as the guys line up on the field and meet
George. As always, he goes over the rules (1 win = go to
Final; 2 wins = eliminate someone; 3 wins = choose who
you face in Final), then gets into the explanation for
the first Sacrifice. Here, they just have to play
goalie, defending a net (with 1/3 of it open) while 6
players from the LA. Galaxy, a Major League Soccer team,
are shooting blue soccer balls at it. Each competitor
will face 200 balls, and whoever allows the fewest
number of balls into the net wins. Oh, and they will not
be giving these guys much of a break in between shots,
and they're shooting 2 at a time. Good thing only 1/3 of
the net is open.
Al is up first, and he is ready to go. The only safety
gear involved in addition to standard goalie gear is a
helmet with a face mask. The balls start flying at him,
and he starts out alright. He does block a good number
of them at first, but plenty of balls still manage to
get past him. Eventually, one ball ends up hitting Al in
the, um, lower area. This apparently affected his
performance as the Sacrifice went on, but he does keep
blocking a few. With less than 10 balls to go, Al gets
hit in the face mask, and the force of the hit sends him
back into the net! The shooters pause for a moment to
let him get up and back into position to finish up, and
at the end, Al has allowed 82 of the 200 balls.
Luis is next up, and he gets a good start as well,
blocking a good number of shots. But he appears to be
faltering for a bit, and more balls get through and into
the net. Past the halfway point, and he appears to be
behind the current pace, having allowed half the balls
in. But Luis hangs in there, and does his best to block
what he can. And he did seem to do a lot better as it
went on, and once the last of the balls were shot, Luis'
count is 68 goals, putting him ahead.
Last but not least, Brandon gets his shot at playing
goalie. The balls start flying, and an early block sends
him stumbling to the ground! He gets up quickly, though,
but he did let a few through at that point. As the balls
keep flying, he keeps blocking, but he does let a set of
balls through at one point. Brandon ends up taking a
ball to the head as well, but it doesn't faze him as
much, and he keeps going. In the end, he only allowed 62
balls through, and that means Brandon wins the
Sacrifice! And Jerred is one step closer to playing ball
(of a different kind)!
Day 2 (PAIN): Getting Thrown to the Mat... A Lot
Arriving at a gym this time, the guys line up and await
the next Sacrifice. George explains that they just have
to do some wrestling. However, each of them will wrestle
an Olympic gold medalist, Cael Sanderson. And he happens
to be undefeated in college; 159 wins, no losses. After
a demonstration of what Cael can do, George goes on to
say that they'll simply have to avoid getting pinned.
Whoever gets pinned the least number of times wins.
They'll each be tossed around for 2 3-minute rounds.
How's that for a Sacrifice?
After discussing strategy with their friends/relatives
in the back, Al is in the ring first. The whistle blows,
and though he tries to stay up, pin #1 comes at just
over 10 seconds in. The second pin comes at about 15
seconds later, and then the throwing really begins. Al
gets slammed all around the mat throughout the round.
With 11 seconds left in the round, the pin count is at
12. Al goes low, and just barely manages to avoid a 13th
pin when time runs out. He's really tired after that
round, but he has to recover enough for a second round.
In that round, Al doesn't fare much better, with pin #13
made about 8 seconds in. He just kept getting picked up
and dropped down, and with about 54 seconds left, the
total count is 22. At that point, Al is just laying on
the ground, and the ref asks if he'll quit. Al looks
over at Joe, and he slowly gets back up, ready to
continue. From then on, he tries to get on his stomach
when going down, but he ended up with another 7, making
Al's final count 29.
Luis is next, and weighing 65 pounds less than Cael, he
knows that this will be really hard. The first pin on
him comes at around the same time as Al's first, and
from then on, he tries his best to stay out of pinning
predicaments, but the pins keep coming. With 9 seconds
left, Luis' pin count is 14, and just before time ran
out, Cael scores #15, as Danny is in apparent disbelief.
Luis is currently behind the pace that Al set, so he'll
have to do better in the second round. In the second
round, Luis does his best to struggle out, but Cael
keeps finding ways to pin him, and keeps making those
pins. He's up to 27 with 51 seconds left, and it only
takes another 6 seconds for #28. Luis will have to avoid
being pinned anymore for 45 seconds to take the lead, as
1 pin will now tie Al. He does what he can, but with
just under 30 seconds left, he gets pinned for the 29th
time. And his fate for this Sacrifice is sealed with
about 24 seconds left, with #30. After a couple more,
bringing Luis' final count to 32, he heads to the back
to get some ice for his neck, which is in a lot of pain.
Last to go once again is Brandon, and his first pin
comes at 14 seconds in. And then the throwing starts,
and he gets slammed down and pinned plenty of times. But
he falls behind the pace, as his pin count is at 17 with
3 seconds left in the first round. Brandon gets through
those 3 seconds without another pin, and he knows that
he'll need to do much better to finish with less than
29. It looks like he won't fare much better, though, as
he gets thrown down and pinned in 8 seconds after the
start of the second round. However, he has a hard time
getting up from that slam, but he recovers and is ready
to go once again, only to endure more of the same.
Eventually, he's up to 29, with 1 whole minute left.
That means he must avoid another pin for that whole
minute to force a tie. That won't happen, though, as it
only takes 5 seconds for #30 to happen. And with that,
Al wins the Sacrifice, bringing Joe one step closer to
playing for a minor league baseball team for a day! This
also puts pressure on Luis, who now must win the next
Sacrifice to stay in the running.
Day 3 (SHAME): Might as Well Throw Style & Grace Out
the Window
This time, they're at a large pool, and it appears that
some sort of event is being set up. George explains that
for this Sacrifice, they just have to go for a swim. But
it's not an ordinary swim; they'll be participating in a
synchronized swimming event! After a demonstration of an
8-person routine, it is explained that they'll be
competing in 2 hours, and the judges for the actual
competition will also determine the winner of this
Sacrifice. Each of the guys will be paired with an
Olympic synchronized swimmer. Oh, and there's just one
more thing: the outfits. Women's swimsuits and flower
caps. And believe me, they look ridiculous when the guys
are wearing them!
Luis is paired with Brooke Abel, Al is paired with
bronze medalist Sara Lowe, and Brandon is paired with
bronze medalist Stephanie Nesbitt. The Olympians give
the guys some pointers about their routines in a nearby
gym, and then, it's showtime! As other swimmers are
performing, the guys walk out towards the pool, and
various spectators notice them and get a kick out of
seeing 3 guys wearing women's swimwear. Talk about
shameful...
Luis and Brooke are up first, and he needs this to avoid
elimination. Once the music starts, they do a bit of a
dance before diving into the pool. They get into their
routine, and Luis is keeping his eyes on Brooke most of
the time. So that he knows what actions to imitate. (Why
did you think he did that?) He is able to mostly
synchronize his routine with hers, though he's a bit
late with a leg-raising move. But when Brooke dives
under to do some leg motions over the water, Luis can't
seem to get under enough to do the same. That might cost
him. But once the routine is over, Luis is having
trouble staying above the water due to being worn out,
so Brooke has to help him out of the pool. As if the
outfit wasn't embarrassing enough.
Brandon and Stephanie are next, and after they do their
own dance, which included a bit of the Robot for some
reason, and a high-five, they CANNONBALL into the pool!
Once in, Brandon is a bit late in following Stephanie's
routine, but he catches up for a bit. They incorporate a
bit more Robot in there, but he once again falls behind
and fails to synchronize for a bit. Eventually, they end
the routine with a mock fishing bit, with Brandon acting
as the angler, and Stephanie acting as the fish! I don't
know if that will win the Sacrifice, but it was
definitely a crowd-pleaser!
And now, it's Al and Sara's turn. Once they got through
their dancing, which included some butt-shaking (I kept
my eyes on Sara during that), they dive in. Once again,
Al is a little behind, but not too far behind, and he
does manage to dive under a second after she does. He's
trying to stay in synch, though it is difficult for him,
but he does pull off a leg-raising maneuver while
keeping in synch well. He does do rather well for a guy
that hasn't done this before, trying to keep in synch
with someone who has done this a lot. They finish their
routine to quite the applause. But will that be enough
to win this?
Afterwards, George has the guys lined up, waiting for
the decision. He says that they all did a good job.
However, he's not going to reveal the name of the winner
yet. He's going to make them wait until the Final!
Day 4 (INSANE): A Dynamite Spin to Croquet
The guys arrive at a field, where George is waiting for
them with a medal in his hand. That medal has the name
of the winner of the third Sacrifice on it. If it's
Luis, then it'll be a 3-way Final; otherwise, he's out,
and it'll be Al vs. Brandon for all the marbles. George
unwraps the medal, and the name on it is... Al! (It
actually said "Alphonse", so that must be Al's full
first name.) That means that Luis is going home, which
means no sports fantasy for his brother. After saying
their good-byes, Luis and Danny leave.
Now, it's time for the Final. George explains that for
this one, they just have to play a little croquet.
However, instead of hitting a small ball with a mallet,
they'll be guiding a big ball with a car, which has a
cowcatcher on it. They'll have to push the ball through
14 wickets (marked by tire stacks) in the proper order,
circling it around a tower of cars halfway through.
Skipping a wicket will result in a 5-minute penalty. And
once the ball has gone through all the wickets, instead
of the final stake, they have a final tower to simulate
a big stake. And they'll have to drive through that
tower, which will blow up when hit, to stop the clock.
Fastest time wins. Sounds fun.
For winning 2 Sacrifices, Al gets to choose whether to
go first or second, and he opts to go second. So Brandon
is up first. He gets suited up and into safety gear
before getting into the car. The horn is blown, and
Brandon drives through a small fire, which has
conveniently been placed in front of the car at the
start, and into the ball, sending it forward and through
a wicket. He then has some trouble maneuvering the ball
to the next wicket, but he slowly gets it through.
Moving along, he ends up overshooting the 4th wicket,
missing it completely, but moving on anyway to the 5th.
The 6th and 7th are close together, but Brandon gets it
through them without much trouble. He also makes the
circle around the car tower, and through the 8th and 9th
easily He is able to guide the ball slowly through each
of the remaining wickets, and once the ball is through
the last one, Brandon speeds up the ramp and through the
final tower! The boxes after the tower slow down the car
and stop it, and after getting out of the car, his time
is given as 7:58, but the 5-minute penalty for skipping
the 4th wicket brings it up to 12:58.
Al is up next, and with a time of 12:58 to beat, he
might have a good chance at this. The clock starts, and
Al is through the small fire and is hitting the ball
forward. But he just about forgets the 3rd wicket
completely! He does realize this before reaching the
4th, and he has to backtrack the ball to that wicket. He
struggles with the maneuvering a bit, using up some
time, but he does get it through to avoid the penalty.
Al continues along, easily getting through the 4th and
5th wickets, but when trying to get the ball through the
next two, it misses both! Al tries to get the ball back
in front of them, swearing all the while, but after he
gets it through the 6th, it misses the 7th! He does hit
it back towards the wicket, and it goes through. After
circling around the tires, Al gets the ball through the
8th, but it is hit out of position for the 9th! He
swears some more, then gets the ball back into position
before hitting it through and continuing on. After a
smooth run through the 10th wicket, he tries to hit the
ball through the 11th, but it bounces off the left post!
After some more swearing, he gets it through, then gets
through the rest without incident. Once through the last
wicket, Al drives up the ramp and through the explosive
final tower!
But did Al do it fast enough? He didn't have any
penalties, but he made a few mistakes that slowed him
down along the way. Brandon's time was 12:58, and Al's
time is... 10:09! Al wins the Final! That means that Joe
will get to play for the El Paso Diablos for a day!
1 Week Later
Joe arrives at Cohen Stadium in El Paso, Texas, and upon
entering, he meets the manager of the El Paso Diablos,
Mike Marshall. He informs Joe of when to be there the
next day, and then we see the Spring Training, where Joe
will get to take part in it. Joe goes through the team's
drills, including batting, running, and fielding, and he
seems to have impressed the manager by how well he did
them. The next day, which is Opening Day for the Diablos,
and Mike gives some encouragement to Joe in the locker
room before they head out. In the stands are Joe’s
family, as well as the guy responsible for making this
happen for him, Al. Eventually, Joe's name is announced,
and he comes out of the dugout to join the team in
lining up.
To the game we go, and Joe is in right field. He goes a
good job fielding a ground ball in the 1st inning. We
then see the Diablos get a home run with Joe in the
dugout cheering. Fast forward to the 2nd inning, and
it's Joe's turn at bat. Here's the pitch-by-pitch
rundown of how he did:
1. Pitch is wide; Ball 1
2. Swing and a miss; Strike 1
3. Another swing and a miss; Strike 2
4. No swing; pitch was just barely in the strike zone;
Strike 3
Ouch. Not the way that he wanted for that to go, and he
ended up getting pulled from the game after that. But at
least he got the chance to be in the game, and he even
got to sign some autographs for some people (most likely
family members). And he has Al to thank for this.
Well, that's it for the second season of I'd Do
Anything. And with ESPN having more time to fill now
that they aren't airing NHL games anymore, even if they
do settle that lockout deal, I wouldn't be surprised to
see a third season. |
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Previous Episodes
April 25
May 2
May 9
May 16
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