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It's a battle of the footballers in several... shall we say, non-football events.

Recaps by Gordon Pepper, GSNN


FACT FILE:
Hosts:
Joe Theismann & Kirk Herbstreit
Reporters:
Harold Reynolds & Sam Ryan
Packager: ESPN Original Entertainment, Transworld International
Origin:
Disney's Wide World of Sports Complex, Walt Disney World; Orlando, FL
Airs:
Tuesdays at 9pm ET on ESPN


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No infringement of copyright is intended by these fan pages; production companies of shows this site covers retain all rights to the sounds, images, and information contained herein. No challenge to copyright is implied. 

Web design by Jason Elliott. Logo by Chico Alexander. 

"Episode 2" - April 19

In our first episode, the National Team won the first 2 events, but got incredibly sloppy and the American Team came back to win. Can the Nationals bounce back from that mess? We find out as...

We start with the Tug-O-War. Does it sound familiar? It should, because that's what they did on their last show. Like last episode, there is a huge weight disparity, but this time, it's the Nationals who are the light weights and the Americans who are heavy. As a reminder, let's see who is on the roster...

Americans -

Peyton Manning - Quarterback, and going up against daddy Archie, who's coaching the Nationals.
Deion Branch - Wide Receiver
Byron Leftwich - Quarterback
Hines Ward - Wide Receiver
Takeo Spikes - Linebacker
Chad Johnson - Wide Receiver Troy Brown - Wide Receiver, Defensive Back, Punt Returner, and whatever the heck else he wants to play
Joey Porter - Outside Linebacker
Marvin Harrison - Wide Receiver
Donnie Edwards - Linebacker. Nice to see that he wasn't too injured from the season to participate in this competition.

And the Nationals -

Brian Dawkins - Freelance Safety
Laveranues Coles - Wide Receiver
Brian Westbrook - Running Back
Alge Crumpler - Tight End
Julius Jones - Running Back
Jason Witten - Tight End
Kabeer Gbaja-Biamila - Defensive End. I probably spelled it wrong. No, I'm not saying that name fast 5 times.
Jeremiah Trotter - Middle Linebacker
Eli Manning - Quarterback, and apparently dad's favorite son.
Joe Horn - Wide Receiver

The people playing this week are the ones who didn't play last week - Leftwich, Ward, Spikes, Harrison and Edwards for the Americans and Dawkins, Coles, Jones, Witten and Biamila (no, I am NOT saying that whole last name) for the Nationals. It doesn't really matter what the line-up is - the Nationals wipe out the Americans and they take the first game. (Nationals lead, 1-0, 3-3 tie overall).

Next up - the War Canoe! How does this work, you ask? 5 people paddle a war canoe twice across a water course. The canoe was a huge fixture on the Battle shows in the '70's, so why not bring it back? The key is navigating the buoy and not capsizing - especially because Byron can't swim. As the match starts, both canoes are close until it comes to the first buoy. The Nationals have no problems steering around the Buoy, while it looks like the Americans want to steer the canoe to guam. The Americans finally get themselves together, but not before the Nationals have a 4 length lead on them.

While the Nationals turn around for their second leg, the Americans are trying to ram the Nationals and capsize them. No such luck. By the time that the Americans get around for the second lap, the Nationals are coming down the stretch as they easily win this one (Nationals lead 2-0, 4-3 Overall).

Event #3 is the relay race. Byron Leftwich, who is a big boy, will be running this event. He's a 240 pound monster who says that he's pretty agile. Sure - when he's not nursing a sore ankle. 'I'm not the slowest quarterback in the NFL. I'm the slowest Black quarterback in the NFL.' No comment.

Leg #1 - Leftwich Vs. Dawkins
Leg #2 - Harrison Vs. Witten
Leg #3 - Gbaja, etc. Vs. Edwards
Leg #4 - Coles Vs. Spikes
Leg #5 - Jones Vs. Ward

And they're off! Leftwich slips at the start, but still has a lead. The lead is gone when Dawkins takes over as the Nationals take the lead. Gbaja-Biamila maintains the lead when he gives it to Coles, who extends his lead. The last leg features Jones, who's trying to hold off a charging Ward. He does so, as he holds off a tough spurt from Ward, and he takes the win for the Nationals (Nationals lead 3-0, 5-3 Overall).

The American League desperately needs to make up some ground and win the obstacle course, or it will be a 5-0 sweep for the Nationals for a 7-3 lead overall. This course is different from the one last episode - we have the culverts, blocking sled and tires, but we also get a high jump, slalom, basketball shot, monkey bars, hurdles, a small pass, the over/unders and finally, the wall. Everyone from both teams will run the whole course, and the team that gets through it the quickest (barring penalties) will win the event and 2 important points.

It's not looking good for the Americans early - Coles (N) is outpacing Harrison (A), but Coles misses the basketball shot, which is results in a 5 second penalty. Harrison doesn't, and he catches up to Coles when we get to the wall. Harrison gets over the wall and wins, while Harrison quits and tacks on a huge 15 second penalty to his losing time. After the first round, Coles - 1:57.76m while Harrison - 1:26.33

Heat #2 - Hines Ward (A) is up Vs. Biamila (N). Biamila has to make up 30+ seconds worth of time, which isn't going to happen early on. KBG makes his shot and Ward doesn't, which opens up the door. Ward opens up the door even more as he misses his catch and also doesn't make it to the wall, while K B-G gets over in 1:33.65 War's time? 2:05.23. Yick.

Heat #3 - Witten (N) goes up against Leftwich (A) as the Americans look to extend the lead. Witten plows through the high jump instead of jumping it, so it's a 5 second penalty. It's all neck and neck to the wall, and both of them run out of gas. They both quit and Leftwich (1:54.83) barely wins by over Witten (1:55.98).

Heat #4 - Jones (N) Vs. Spikes (A). Both of them run a clean game. It comes down, once again, to the wall. Jones gets their first, and struggles to get there, but he manages to do it in 1:27.83. Spikes gives up - but he gives up without trying to get up the wall, and that's a massive 15 second penalty for 1:46.8. The ref tells Spikes this and he yells at referee Bob MacElwy.

Heat #5 - Edwards (A) Vs... No one? Apparently, Dawkins is injured (someone call his agent) so the Americans can drop their lowest time. Hence, Edwards needs to finish this in 1:47.25 to win it. Dawkins knows that a smooth error-free race will win it, but he doesn't get over the high jump and takes a 5 second penalty. This forces Edwards to make the lay-up (which he does) and get over the wall - which he does. The final time is 1:45.90, which is barely enough time to win it - but win it, he does.

The Americans win the event and get a much needed 2 points. However, despite the American's win here, the Nationals win the night 3-2 and tie everything up at 5-5.

Next Week - We go golfing and the Manning brothers go at it again. Join us in 7 days to see the balls - and fur - fly.

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