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Today is

Ballroom Bowl IV - May 21

Ah yes, the season is almost at the end. Only 120 minutes of solid performances and solid dancing. Only 1 winner will go home with a trophy, and the other 2 will just go home. Let's get this place rockin'!

To give you an idea of what the show is like, we give you segments on seasons past, the international versions, how the finalists got here and how the family and friends of each finalist is interviewed. With the eliminated faithful on hand, the dance pros from the tour do "It's Oh So Quiet" by Bjork. But it's about to get loud as we pick up where it left off with round 3.

The couples pick a favorite routine from this season. Apolo & Julianne will re-do the paso doble, and yes, they corrected one mistake from the round. Following that, Joey & Kym did a tango mixed in with Star Wars. (It's celebrating 30 years this week.) Lastly, Laila & Max and the mambo that gave the audience more. Believe it or not, the judges gave 30s to every single one this round, meaning that Apolo & Julianne has the advantage. But the disadvantage meant someone was gone. The bronze medal.........went to...........Laila & Max. They sit on the stairs and pretended that they would've won it.

Time now for the 8 couples who danced....but fell short. Remember Paulina's um...big fall? Or was it Shandi's....uh....toy doll look? Could it be Clyde's....tall....stuff....or....John's....goofiness....or maybe Leeza's....uh, celebration of being 50.....or Billy Ray' rom the first week.....or was it Ian's.....scoreboard slips.....or was is Heather's......prosetic leg? I'll just never know.

Tom then grilled the ousted kids about what the heck happened, how the heck did it happen, and what will be in the future should things happen. Samantha changed hands to give advice to the active couples from the past champions. Ok, enough chit-chatter, let's crown the winner.

The winner.....of....Dancing....With The




Apolo & Julianne! Yes, congrats to the speed skater who'll add a trophy to his impressive medals, and as for Joey, his dancing may be good, but it wasn't enough to give him the runner-up spot. So, there you have it. Whether you did a waltz with Vanessa Minnillo, a rumba with Jeanette Lee or a mambo with Seth Green, it's got to be Dancing With The Stars. Until next season, I'm Pierre Kelly saying dots & power pellets, I'm out.

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