July 8, 2003
What do you get when you
take eight total strangers, drop them off in Miami and
tell them they have to complete 10 sports-related tasks
in 30 days and get to the base of Mount Rushmore...all
with nothing but the clothes on their back and a valid
drivers' license? Why, you have ESPN's Beg, Borrow &
Deal 2, the sequel to the sport network's first-ever
For those unfamiliar with the show, I just gave you the
general idea. Two teams of four have thirty days to make
it from South Beach in Miami, Florida to the base of
Mount Rushmore in Rapid City, South Dakota. But they
can't just find a Greyhound to bring them straight there
on Dutch. They are each given a list of 50 tasks and
must perform ten of them en route. Among these tasks are
"reward challenges" which, when completed, will earn
them either a complete McDonald's meal for everyone on
the team OR the use of a Subaru Baja for 12 hours. The
Subarus may ALSO be picked up at one of five landmarks:
one each in Atlanta, Dallas, Denver, St. Louis and
Washington, D.C. Only one task can be done in any one
state. The 1-1-12 rule is back in effect, where a team
can ask 1 non-monetary favor from any 1 person which
must be completed within 12 hours.
Now here's something NEW for BBD2: Elimination. When one
team reaches five completed tasks, BOTH teams must
eliminate a teammate and run with a replacement for the
rest of the race!
Then there's the grand prize: two tickets to ANY four
sports championships of their choice. This can be
anything from the World Series to the Super Bowl to
Wimbledon to the World Cup.
And now, to quote Anne Robinson, let's meet the teams:
Stacey - Tall, long blond hair, flirt
Doug - anxious surfer-looking dude (the one that was on
"Dog Eat Dog" recently)
Greg - Tall, clean-shaven, surely athletic
Kerri - short, black-haired female, a bit on the
Charles - the lone African-American on the show
Annemarie - short brunette, rather spunky
Kristin - slightly taller brunette, calm,
decent-sized..."tracks of land" (wink, wink)
Eric - Mid-20s, handsome man...in fact, a model
Olympic Gold Medallist swimmer, "NBA Inside Stuff"
hostess and ex-Nickelodeon game show host Summer Sanders
is your host...and she quickly sends the teams off on
their month-long trek!
The Red Team immediately puts the task list on the sand
and looks over what's so tough about it. Among those
#5: "Score a goal from center ice of an NHL rink." (The
arena the Panthers play in was about 2 hours' drive from
#4: "McDonald's Reward: Get a bat from a Major League
Baseball All-Star and get a hit during batting
(Pro Player Stadium was closer, but not by all that
#2: "Play a set of tennis against either Venus or Serena
Williams." (Good luck finding THEM)
Finally, both teams find out something they like:
#17: "Subaru Reward: Three team members must jump off a
10-meter diving platform, and one MUST complete a
Well, since 12 hours with a Subaru is on the line (and
since it can be done at most any Olympic-sized pool with
said platform), both teams decide to try for it. But it
hits Annemarie that they don't have a way to get TO a
pool with a 10-meter platform. So, the Green Team begs a
cabbie to take them where they have to go.
The Red Team asks the locals about nearby high-dive
pools. One girl suggests the U. of Miami pool in Coral
Gables, but doesn't want to head down there. It hits
Greg at this point that they're broke and must start
mooching. They ask a guy in a mini-van for a ride there,
and he (sort of reluctantly) accepts.
1:20pm, Coral Gables, FL - the Red Team arrives at U of
M, feeling nervous. The pool manager suggests jumping
off a highway overpass instead of his platform. So they
look over the list again and, lo and behold, Stacey
#34: "Swim a 200-meter Individual Medley (50 meters each
of butterfly, backstroke, breaststroke and freestyle) in
an Olympic-sized pool (50 meters long) in under four
minutes." (BTW, Summer holds the American Record in this
event at 2 minutes, 11 seconds)
Unfortunately, Stacie and Doug prove that it is not as
easy as they think. Greg, however, remains confident
that he can do it. After three legs, he's making good
time. But he becomes exhausted doing the freestyle and
bails about 20 meters from the finish. Kerri doesn't
even try it...and Doug realizes just how hard these
Meanwhile, just a few miles north, the cabbie drops the
Green Team off at Florida International University in
North Miami. One problem: no 10-meter platform at the
pool. They, too, discover task #34 and decide to try the
under-four-minute I.M. Now the problem is talking
security into letting them jump in and give it a go.
After calling the super, they are allowed 15 minutes,
enough for one person to give it a go. Charles elects
After two legs, he's well ahead of pace at 1:35...but
the breaststroke proves to be the killer; it takes two
minutes to complete. He swims his hardest
freestyle...but ends up six seconds over. Team's bummed
all around...and they're certain that no one can pull
2:40, Coral Gables, FL - the Red Team gives up on
aquatic-based tasks for the time being. They go down the
list again and stumble upon:
#12: "Subaru Reward: Make a lay-up, a free-throw and a
3-pointer in 20 seconds on an NBA court"
Well, the American Airlines Arena is only about 20
minutes away...and Greg JUST HAPPENS to know somebody
who knows Miami Heat guard Mike James (riiiiiiiiiiight!).
Kerri calls on a borrowed cell phone and shmoozes James
into meeting with them. Sure enough, an hour later,
James pulls up in a Hummer to help. Problem: the court
isn't assembled and the hoops aren't up. So much for
that. Stacey is rather ticked. So...on to Plan D:
#41: "Anchor the sportscast of any local television
The team gets a ride with another set of strangers and
headed up to Miramar.
4:40pm, Ft. Lauderdale - The Green Team is right on
their backside trying to vacate South Florida. Eric
tries to talk his friend, Roman, into driving the team 5
hours to Charles' parent's place in Daytona. Roman
9:20pm, Miramar - After a "scary" (according to Stacey)
ride with a guy named Guy, Red Team arrives at WTVJ
studios (why they'd mention an NBC channel, I'll never
know) and tries to talk their way into doing a
sportscast. But it is sweeps week...AND the night of the
NFL Draft. Kerri is so very...over-the-top and demanding
about wanting in there. After some serious begging,
security agrees to a SMALL piece at the end of the
newscast. However, the executive producer 86es the idea.
Good news: J.J. from the sports crew gives them a place
to stay in Ft. Lauderdale. BETTER news: Joe Rose, sports
anchorman and ex-Miami Dolphin, agrees to take them to
the International Swimming Hall of Fame in Ft.
Lauderdale in the morning!
OK, brief pause to explain the rules for "Run of the
House". If a person gives a team the favor of using a
house or apartment, they more or less take over the
place. Phone, internet, bed, showers,
kitchen...EVERYTHING can be utilized by the team! The
only downside? Just like all other favors, they can only
stay for 12 hours.
So J.J. takes them to his house where all four share a
futon on an upstairs room. They're tired and bummed that
they have yet to perform a single task even though they
tried four times. But they're optimistic for tomorrow.
Meanwhile, many miles north, the Green Team arrives in
Palm Coast, Florida, just north of Daytona. Their
ultimate destination is Charles' step-dad's place. They
get Run of the House but they're so exhausted from the
5-hour ride that they pretty much shower and collapse.
Day 1 ends with both teams tied at nil.
Day 2, 9:03am, Ft. Lauderdale - Nearing the tail-end of
J.J.'s "favor", the Red Team wakes up, freshens up,
straightens up, thanks J.J. for the Run of the House and
feel more optimistic about the days ahead. Rose picks
them up (since he lives close by to J.J.'s) and heads
for the Swimming Hall of Fame in downtown Ft.
Lauderdale. Their goal is to complete task #17: the
10-meter high-dive. Stu Marvin, the manager of the Hall,
seems tight with Rose and allows the team to try their
task...provided they work their way up (don't want any
lawsuits, after all).
It is at the point when they approach the diving array
when they realize that the 10-meter platform is
equivalent to about 45 feet above the surface of the
pool...so it'll be like jumping off a four-story
building! They start off the 3-meter platform and they
all take the plunge without a problem. They move up to
the 5-meter, then the 7.5-meter. When they finally get
up the nerve (and the confidence of Marvin) to climb to
the 10-meter, it's decided that Kerri would do the
cannonball. The team is quite nervous, but huddle up for
confidence, knowing they're going to get out of Florida
(due to the "one state, one task" rule).
Stacey jumps first just fine. Doug pikes next, followed
by Greg just stepping off. Then it was Kerri's turn to
cannonball...and she starts to wonder if she'll get hurt
doing this. She hesitates...right through commercial.
Finally, after much yelling, Kerri leaps, tucks, and
crashes butt-first into the pool. Everybody dives in to
congratulate her...and she shows off that her ass-cheek
is now as red as her bikini.
RED TEAM: 1, GREEN TEAM: 0
Of course, with the passing of the first task comes the
naming of the team. After throwing several names out,
they decide that the Red Team will become "Team
Exodus"...or "Team Ex" for short.
And now comes the FUN part. Team Ex gets the opportunity
to call the other team on the Producer's Cell Phone and
gloat to them. They opt to do so...and they ESPECIALLY
rub it in that they got the Subaru Baja. Now Green Team
can scratch off #17 from the list; both teams cannot do
the same task.
But just a moment there. Just because Team Ex has the
Baja doesn't mean they can make their "exodus" from
Florida just yet. They decide to try to bum some cheap
super-sized drinks off a guy at a nearby gas station for
the trip. They get the drinks, some directions towards
Atlanta and awa-a-a-ay they go!
10:20am, Palm Coast, FL - Meanwhile, the as-yet-unnamed
Green Team ponder a task from BBD1:
#42: "Get a permanent tattoo (of a sports logo) above
the waist at least 3 inches in diameter."
They decide to head north to Jacksonville to get the
tattoo. Annmarie is ticked that Eric stalled for four
hours to call friends to pick them up and take them to
Jacksonville. What Eric was trying to do is arrange a
bigger car and fuel stops. This takes all morning before
said friend, Geena, finally appears, agreeing to take
them all the way to Atlanta. The team gathers up in a
truck and heads up I-95 to Jacksonville...and tries to
figure out how to get a tattoo parlor to give them free
Fortunately, a parlor there is more than willing to give
the four free tattoos (I'm guessing in return for free
advertising...it's called "Southside Tattoo" for any of
you in the JAX area). Kristin thinks about getting her
nipples pierced while there. Eric is gerrymandered into
going first...and he's worried about how it would affect
his modeling career. He gets a Detroit Tigers logo on
his right shoulder blade (as if getting a tattoo isn't
masochistic enough). Kristin gets an Oklahoma U. logo
just above her right butt-cheek...and winces the whole
time. Annmarie gets a Texas logo on her lower back...and
cries through it. With Charles getting one on his bicep,
the task is complete!
GREEN TEAM: 1, TEAM EXODUS: 1
And Green Team becomes..."Team Cake"?! Well,...yeah.
"Cake" stands for Charles, Annemarie, Kristin and Eric.
Makes sense, right? Anyhow, Team Cake calls Team Ex to
tell them about the tattoos.
After getting off the phone, Team Ex goes to cross off
#42...only to pretty much tear the Baja apart in search
of the task list. Both Stacey and Doug were certain that
the game was over before it ever really took off...since
they felt that they'd be DQed for losing the map.
3:40pm, Brookside, FL - Team Exodus is still tearing the
Baja from limb to limb, looking for the cloth task map
they need to complete the game. Everyone starts pointing
fingers as to who had it last. Kerri blames herself,
thinking she probably left it at a gas station three
hours' driving south of there. So, despite the fact that
they would probably end up hitching a ride to Atlanta
due to the 12-hour rule for using the Baja, they drive
back to Ft. Lauderdale and re-trace their steps. They
knew it was, essentially, a six-hour penalty; three to
return to where they left off and three to return to
So, after 3 hours of backtracking, they're back to where
they once belonged and they return to the gas station
where they mooched the drinks. Sure enough, the
attendant had found the map and had kept it for them.
Kerri still blames herself...and so does everyone else.
She is a key target for "elimination". But a Plan B is
concocted. Greg has a friend, Amy, in Orlando who can
put them up for the night and, with any luck, provide
them with further transportation to Atlanta...even
though Team Cake is probably half-way there by now.
9:20pm, Orlando, FL - Team Exodus arrives at Amy's
place. They get Run of the House...though, in the 12
hours they had the Baja, they only ended up FOUR hours'
drive from where they started from.
10:54pm - Atlanta, GA - Meanwhile, 400 miles north of
where Team Exodus is roosting, Team Cake has made a
beeline for Atlanta. Specifically, they're headed for
Centennial Olympic Park, the centerpiece of the 1996
Olympic Games, to pick up a Subaru of their own for 12
hours. Centennial Olympic Park is one of the five
"landmarks" teams can arrive at to pick up a Baja. It
doesn't take long for the team to find the park and nab
the car for 12 hours. I'm guessing the 12 hours doesn't
start until morning, since Geena's friend Jeff has paid
for their stay at a hotel for the night. Charles recaps
the day, saying that it started off rough when Team Ex
called them, but got better when they got the tattoos
and evened the score. Eric says they need to keep Team
Ex on their heels.
Day 2 ends with the teams tied at one-all...but with
Team Cake a LONG way ahead.
Day 3, 10am, Atlanta, GA - Morning shines in the Peach
State's capital...and more name dropping starts the day
for Team Cake. Seems Charles can hook them up with Ray
Farmer, whom he met at Duke University and who works as
a scout for the Atlanta Falcons. Why?
#7: "Subaru Reward: Snap and hold a 35-yard field goal
for a starting NFL kicker"
Completing this task would give the team TWO Subarus to
use to head for North Carolina. So Charles calls Farmer,
who agrees to give them a tour of the training complex
and, with ANY luck, there might be some players there.
So into the Baja they go and off to training camp.
Charles warns, however, that Farmer is expecting just
HIM...and he MIGHT freak at seeing all four looking to
get a kicker to kick a FG for them.
It's a bit of a wait and Eric is getting too impatient.
He decided that Farmer said he' meet them by the front
GATE, not the front ENTRANCE. He wants to go to where
both front and back doors can be watched. The others
feel he's far too anxious to complete the task and might
try "harassing" players. Eric goes to the middle of the
roundabout in front of the building and...well, acts all
goofy. He spies a black Hummer leaving...and is almost
certain it's their kicker departing. Eric is a target
8:30am, Orlando, FL - Meanwhile, back in time in the
Sunshine State, the girls of Team Exodus complain about
the cleanliness of Amy's place, with Stacey not DARING
to rest her pretty hair of head on the pillow.
Thankfully, Doug gave his sweatshirt as a pillowcase.
Doug admits an attraction to Stacey (a "budding
relationship" is obligatory in every reality series, it
seems). Stacey admits to being a flirt...but considers
Doug more like a brother. Greg wants the hell out of
Florida. That's good, because Amy can get them the hell
out. Kerri is STILL kicking herself for leaving the map
behind and costing the team valuable time. But all is
not lost, since Greg finds a rather interesting task
that makes Kerri perk up:
#35: "Have dinner with Mark Cuban, Daniel Snyder or an
Aloof Brother on their private jet, house or hotel
NAME DROP! The Aloofs, aside from being owners of the
Sacramento Kings, are also "family friends" of Kerri!
She snags a phone from a nearby diner patron and calls
Joe Maloof. She tells him she has to meet with him...but
can't say why. For some reason, Joe says to call back in
9 minutes. Kerri has now made up for her blunder...or
Nine minutes later, she calls back. Maloof says it'll
run them about $61,000 to fly them from Atlanta to
Sacramento and back...and Kerri's heart just stopped. He
asks, "Is it smart for me to do this?" Kerri can't
Will Kerri talk Maloof into blowing 61 "large" just for
dinner? Will Eric stop panicking? Will Doug get ANYTHING
since he was on an NBC show just recently? Stay tuned!
July 15, 2003
Previously on BBD2, Team Exodus jumped off a 10-meter
platform, then penalized themselves by accident by
leaving the task map at a gas station. They are
currently in Orlando and Kerri is debating whether it
would be wise for family friend and Sacramento Kings'
co-owner Joe Aloof to blow $61,000 just to jet the team
from Atlanta to Sacramento and meet them for dinner.
Meanwhile, Team Cake had been scarred for life (they got
tattoos) and anxiously wait (Eric more than the others)
at Atlanta Falcons' training camp in the hopes of
getting a kicker to boot a field goal for them.
Day 3, 5:58pm, Orlando, FL - Kerri is so very...torn.
But, after discussing it with her fellow Team Exodus
members, she tells Joe Aloof to haul the plane out to
Atlanta...and, when they arrive in Sacramento, he'll
understand. All because it's one of the 50 tasks:
#35: "Have dinner with
Mark Cuban, Daniel Snyder or a Maloof Brother on their
private jet, house or hotel room."
Maloof agrees and the team "gets the hell out of
Florida" en route to Atlanta. Suddenly, the bottom drops
out: Greg has lost his driver's license, which he feels
might hinder his chance of getting on the plane since,
after all, airport security is so tight lately. Stacey
is not too pleased with her teammates' constant
misplacing of important items and considers this as they
get closer to "elimination".
3:00, Atlanta, GA -
While Team Exodus struggles with the lose of Greg's
I.D., Team Cake is waiting - some more patiently than
others - at Atlanta Falcons camp for Falcons' scout Ray
Farmer, a former classmate of Charles. Their goal:
#7: "Subaru Reward: Snap
and hold a 35-yard field goal for a starting NFL kicker
(maximum 4 tries) "
All but Eric are calm. Eric is already trying to work up
different plans in case Charles' contact fails to show.
And it is getting on the team's collective nerve.
Annmarie says Eric is a DEFINITE candidate for
eliminate, and Charles concurs. Fortunately, for
EVERYONE's sake, Farmer shows up. As per the 1-1-12
rule, Charles' favor to ask Farmer is to get Jay Feeley,
starting kicker for the Atlanta Falcons, to help with
the task. Farmer said it was no problem. After a few
calls, Feeley meets the team in the practice dome and
informs the team they are lucky he was called in. They
explain what Feely has to do and get to work. Charlie
will hold for the first attempt...assuming Kristin can
snap it right. Unfortunately, she flubs. However, she is
CONFIDENT she can do it on the second try and argues the
chance to try again. They begrudgingly agree. The snap
is all right, Charles' plant is solid, Feeley's kick is
up...and it's GOOD!
TEAM CAKE: 2, TEAM EXODUS: 1
Feeley himself calls Team Exodus to let them know that
#7 is off the list. After the thank yous, Team Cake hop
into the Subaru Baja they just win 12 hours' use of and
heads for Durham, North Carolina. As mentioned before,
Charles went to school at Duke University and knows
quite a few people in the area that might help them with
7:30pm, en route to Atlanta, GA - Stacey still bemoans
the fact that her team is so forgetful. Greg is worried
about getting on the plane without I.D., and Kerri
thinks the Aloofs have spent all that money for nothing.
Fortunately, security said that, since it is a PRIVATE
jet, no I.D. is required (guess it's up to the sap that
SENT the plane to trust that they're not bringing
terrorists or the such). That being resolved, Team
Exodus boards the Leer jet and takes off for Sacramento.
Doug and Stacey get cozy with each other. Doug takes a
wait-and-see attitude, whereas Stacey hopes things don't
Some hours later, they touch down at Sacramento, and the
team gets nervous that the Aloofs will want to disown
Kerri and her family for blowing all this cash on a
reality show task. But when Joe and Gavin Aloof meet the
team on the runway and get the explanation, they're all
smiles and glad to help. So they go aboard the jet and
have a decent dinner.
Joe thought that Kerri might have been abducted (which
is what Kerri thought he'd think). They end with a small
cake with the Kings' logo on it and they say to the
camera that Team Cake better take this as a warning:
Team Ex ain't dead yet! All Joe has to say at the end
is, "You'd better win!"
TEAM EXODUS: 2, TEAM CAKE: 2
11:00pm Durham, NC - Charles takes the team to his old
house and asks his old roomie for Run of the House,
which they readily agree to. While grateful for lodging,
the girls think Eric may be taking the hospitality a bit
TOO far, lying on a made bed while very sweaty and
The teams end Day 3 tied at two.
Day 4, 9:00, Durham, NC - After rest and a breakfast,
Charles takes Team Cake to Duke University. Charles
walks around like royalty, getting practically anything
he wants. While they were enjoying a light lunch, the
Producer's Cell Phone rings. It's Team Exodus from
Sacramento, informing them that they've tied the score
with #35. It's time to get serious, but Eric is again
trying to plan ahead for the next task, which makes the
girls a bit irked. But they need to work on the task
they planned on before they arrived at Duke:
#3: "Make one 3-point shot at Cameron Indoor Stadium and
the Dean Dome within one hour; Coach K or Coach Roy
Williams MUST be present to see the shot"
Once more, Charles pulls strings to get Duke basketball
player Chris Duhon to set everything up. Meanwhile, Team
Exodus, after a nice sleep (at location undisclosed),
hop back on the Leer jet and head back to Georgia. Kerri
is so very...loved now by the team, feeling she's
totally made up for losing the map. Greg hopes to
re-establish contacts in Atlanta to continue their
march. The atmosphere on the ride back is like Team
Exodus was a hip-hop troupe traveling in style between
gigs. There's music and dancing and Kerri shaking her
rump and shouting and having fun and...did I mention
3:10pm, Durham, NC - Meanwhile, back at Duke U., Team
Cake gets to Cameron Indoor Stadium...only to find that
Coach K is nowhere on the campus. Charles took it extra
hard, thinking he let the team down. What's more, when
they contact the Dean Dome at U. of North Carolina,
Coach Williams is ALSO out of town. Kristin starts to
wonder why they didn't find this out before they got
there. But Charles, although bummed, does not intend on
leaving Duke without doing a task. So, they find a Plan
#18: "With a 50-meter head start, all members must beat
an Olympic sprinter in a 100-meter dash"
NAME DROP! Charles knows the women's' track coach, and
it's 1996 Gold Medallist Kim Miller! They arrange a
mini-track meet for the next morning and Charles takes
the team to the "pad" of his friend "Deuce", who is now
an Oakland Raider. They have the place to themselves, so
they relax, shower (particularly Eric) and take a big
8:15pm, Atlanta, GA - As Team Cake chills, Team Ex's
plane touches down. A young man named Jack agrees to
take them to Alpharetta (which, if I'm not mistaken, was
one of the stops of "USA's Cannonball Run 2001") to get
Run of the House at the house of the Corrigans, friends
of Greg. The Corrigans welcomed them and let them use
the house as they wish.
Day 5, 9am - It takes some time for the team to
arise...especially to Kerri's chant of "glory, glory,
glory", which they've been subjected to every morning.
Greg's the only one complaining, though. Stacey and
Kerri also get use to some make-up...and Greg shares
tips on how to shave one's own back (EWW!). Anyhow, Doug
gets in contact with several contacts in the hope of
pulling off a rare two-task day. More details later.
11am, Durham, NC - Team Cake gets brought over to Duke
by a kicker on the football team. The team prepares to
square off against Kim Miller in a 100-meter dash.
Kristin is sure that the 50-meter lead will help them
win. Annemarie isn't too confident, certain somebody
might trip on the grass. Eric is on the fence about it.
Then they watch Miller warm up...and most of their
confidence fades. Miller's not too sure herself about
beating even one of them, but puts her money on
outrunning a girl. They get on their marks...the gun
goes off! The guys easily make further distance from
Miller...AND from the other girls. Fortunately,
Annemarie and Kristin cross the finish line with a
second to spare. Annemarie had been so scared that
Miller was going to catch her at the last second.
TEAM CAKE: 3, TEAM EXODUS: 2
But victory came with a price. Kristin wasn't hydrated
enough and felt rather ill afterwards. Eric thinks that,
if she can't take care of herself and prepare herself
for the physical tasks ahead, it will really clear up
who may have to go come "elimination".10am Atlanta, GA -
As Team Cake prepped for their successful track meet,
Team Exodus heads back into town and towards Phillips
Arena. They hope to accomplish the first of two tasks
they have set for the day:
#28: "McDonald's Reward: Make a 3-pointer inside an NBA
arena (maximum 3 attempts each)" (much like #12, except
it's only a 3-pointer, there's no time limit and there's
no Subaru to get).
As they get into the city, however, they get the bad
news from Team Cake that they've already completed a
task. This made things a bit more tense. Things didn't
get much better when the front desk turned them down
because they didn't have an appointment. Kerri is so
very...POed! As security gets aggressive with her, she
gives it right back with interest. And, when the team is
escorted out of the building, Kerri gets a cell phone
and call the Hawks' PR rep to, rather vocally, explain
her disgruntlement. That's when Doug comes up with the
idea to talk to the STADIUM's PR rep, since it's
different from the Hawks'. They talked to the head of
marketing, who set things up with Hawks Assistant
Director of Media Relations Jon Steinberg and, using
this correct approach, they got themselves access to the
court. Kerri seems to be riding a roller coaster as far
as her teammates are concerned. Though she's done good
for them, she's also been a great liability at times.
Anyway, they make their way to the Hawks' locker
room...where Kerri proceeds to inhale the jockstraps,
try out the massage table and scratch out some sort of
"game plan" on the whiteboard for Stacey. The girls then
do their best cheerleader impersonation.
Kerri is elected to go first. Her first overhead shot
catches nothing but air...though Doug comments that it
WAS on line. The second shot is underhand and is even
worse. At this point, the team has zero-point-nada
confidence in Kerri. But, undaunted, she readies herself
again. She shoots underhand...and you could hear the
"Hallelujah Chorus" go off as she, as Keith Olbermann
used to say, "put the biscuit in the basket"! Kerri
hopes this made up for her "aggressive behavior".
TEAM EXODUS: 3, TEAM CAKE: 3
3:40pm, Durham, NC - While Kristin recovers from being
ill, Team Cake relaxes around Duke's campus. It's no
surprise when they get the call from Team Ex. Once
Kristin was able to move again, they hop on board an
intra-campus bus back to the "pad" to catch a ride to
their next destination somewhere in Virginia. But the
person that had offered the ride hasn't arrived yet. So
they wait...and wait...and wait...and wonder if they'll
EVER leave Duke.
Meanwhile, Team Exodus is on their way to Huntsville,
Alabama...which is a state Doug thinks no one has
thought of on this journey. Their goal is second task of
their doubleheader which is already set up for them:
#20: "Make a 25-yard field goal inside an Arena Football
stadium (no tee; maximum 1 practice kick and 1 attempt
The team's feeling pretty good about their chances as
they roll into Huntsville and make their way to Van
Braun Stadium, home of the Tennessee Valley Vipers, a
"minor league" for the AFL. When Vipers' General Manager
Joe Shroud hears what they intend to do, they say they
can try after practice ends. Even after practice, about
a dozen of the Vipers hang around and give tips.
Finally, the team is ready to try the task. The big
factor: an AFL's goalposts are only nine feet apart (as
compared to 18 1/2 feet in the NFL).Stacey's practice
AND real kick barely get off the ground (the real kick
hurts her toe). Kerri's two kicks aren't much better.
Greg's practice is low and outside, and his real kick is
outside but JUST high enough. Now it's up to Doug, who
used to play soccer. His first kick is up...and GOOD!
Ah, but that was just practice, much to Kerri's chagrin.
Doug needs to hit two in a row, though the average AFL
kicker makes about 40% of these FGs. The kick is
up...and WIDE RIGHT! There were no shouts of "Norwood",
but no doubt Doug sure FELT like him.
4:40pm, Durham, NC - Finally, Duke basketball players
Reggie Love and Chris Duhon come down to bring them to
Maryland (they won't go to D.C. because they have tests
the next day). Charlie says his father will put them up
for the night. But, when they arrive five hours later,
no one is home. And, when Charlie's dad, Charles Porter,
Sr., DOES arrive, he has no idea they were coming and
his house isn't set to accept guests. Fortunately, the
team is so exhausted from the trip that they're ready to
more or less sleep on the hardwood floor.
Will Doug get over his "Norwood"? Will Kristin ever
fully recover? Who will be eliminated when the time
comes? Stay tuned!
July 22, 2003
Previously on BBD2, Team Exodus give the Aloof brothers
a rather expensive dinner and shoots a three-pointer,
but Doug chokes on a field-goal attempt in Huntsville,
Alabama that would put the team ahead. Meanwhile, Team
Cake got Jack Feely to kick a FG for them and beat an
Olympic sprinter (with half-a-field head start). They
had last arrived at Charlie's father's house in
Columbia, Maryland...and Pop wasn't too thrilled. The
teams are tied at three tasks apiece nearing the end
Day 5, 7:20pm,
Huntsville, AL - After the deflating failed kick, Doug
was FUMING and trying his best to kick HIMSELF. Greg, on
the other foot, knew that all was not lost. They could
still do a task in Alabama since this one failed. It was
getting late, so maybe they could do something they
failed to do in Florida:
#41: "Anchor the sportscast of any local television
Art Clarkson, owner of
the Tennessee Valley Vipers' AFL team, was tight with
the local TV station and agreed to help them with this
task. He even drove them to the station...with a stop
off at McDonald's to get the free meal for completing
#28 earlier in the day in Georgia. Along the way, Kerri
tells Doug that he was the only one of the four to have
kicked the field goal, even though it was a practice
After grabbing the meal,
they make their way to WWAY, the local ABC affiliate,
where Mark Marcus, the head sports anchor and director,
spoke with them. Marcus wasn't too keen on it being
tonight, since it was at this time when University of
Alabama football coach Mike Price was under
investigation...not a good time for a jovial visit by
some reality show contestants. The girls feel there's no
way they could get this task done, especially on such
But the rule for the
task never said the sportscast had to be LIVE. Marcus
agreed to TAPE a segment and to run it on the morning
news program the following day (figuring that their
morning news show, like most, are a bit more relaxed and
a lot less serious than the late night telecast). It was
agreed that Greg should do the segment, being a radio
producer, and everyone is relieved. Greg harped on the
fact that they needed to have a flawless telecast
here...not only because they couldn't try it again if
they goofed, but because they SAID they we going to do
two tasks this day and, by granny, they were going to DO
it to boost their morale! "Good morning. I'm Greg Matzek
for ESPN's Beg, Borrow & Deal 2," started the broadcast.
The team was floored by how well Greg handled himself,
saying the lines without a single hitch.
TEAM EXODUS: 4, TEAM
Afterwards, they got the
Run of the House at a Vipers' player's house...but
everyone's mind was now on the forthcoming
"elimination". They agree it would be hard to let one of
them go after all they've done together. Stacey can't
decide on who to take out, Kerri thinks the idea sucks,
Greg is counting on the team making the right
decision...and Doug thinks Greg is thinking he'll be
Day 6, 5:47am,
Huntsville, AL - It's an early start for the weary Team
Exodus. That's because they're up to watch the morning
news broadcast which would make their task complete.
Sure enough, Greg's mug is on the tube...and Mark Marcus
is on after the taped sportcast essentially telling ESPN
to put Greg on "SportsCenter". The team is
STOKED...though still groggy. But there's no rest for
the weary. They have a ride to Nashville, Tennessee. The
PR rep from the Tennessee Titans will hopefully get
things set-up for the team's fifth task:
#49: "Take a picture
with a Heisman trophy and the player who won it."
Their plan: get the pic
with Eddie George, 1995 Heisman winner and current
Titans' starting running back.
Hey, wait a second...there ARE two teams in this
contest, right? Well, while Team Ex was getting on TV,
Team Cake was snoozing at Charles' father's house in
Columbia, MD. Everyone (except Charles, of course) is
homesick and just plain sick of the tasks. Kristin
wanted her mommy every time they failed a task, but was
still competent enough to help Eric map out their next
move. One thing that concerned them was the "Time Zone
Rule", stating that not only can only one task be
performed in any one state but a maximum of FIVE tasks
can be performed in any one of the four contiguous U.S.
time zones. All three tasks Team Cake have done were in
the Eastern Zone. Had they thought about this before,
they would've headed west out of North Carolina instead
of north to D.C. Also, for some reason, these four
educated people thought that Mt. Rushmore, their final
destination, was in D.C.! Suddenly...*ring
ring*...Producer's Cell Phone activates. It's Team Ex,
telling them #41 is off the list. Annemarie did NOT want
to hear that, but Charles just thinks it'll push them
into high gear.
And it does. Kristin is
on the horn, feeling that they can get two tasks in
quick order since the Maryland/D.C. area has many
different sports teams and facilities to work with. Two
catch Kristin's eyes:
#9: "Beat a WNBA
All-Star in a game of one-on-one (first to 7 baskets
#25: "Collectively out-kick a starting NFL punter (3
minutes warm-up time max)"
So Kristin tries to
contact PR reps from both the NFL's Baltimore Ravens and
the WNBA's Washington Mystics to set things up. They are
already late for the Ravens' task...and it gets worse
when Eric ties up the line to, once again, try to set
things up in other states. Afterwards, Kristin gets in
touch with the Ravens while Annemarie and Eric try to
flag a ride into Baltimore. One woman tries to give them
money for a taxi, but they flat-out refuse it. Finally,
the woman agrees to bring them to the Ravens' practice
Some time later, the
team arrives. Ravens PR coordinator Marisol Renner was
happy to accept the team and to help them with their
task. Annemarie is amazed that the punter was drafted -
"Punters don't get drafted!" she says. Out comes said
draftee, Dave Zastudil. When he's told of the task, he
said the four of them might be able to do it...though
teammates Casey Rabach and Joe Salave'a say Zastudil
BETTER be able to out-kick them. Annemarie and Kristin
aren't very thrilled with their practice kicks, Kristin
actually swearing at how bad she's doing. But they get a
bit better, and Charles thinks that, if the girls can
get 25 yards each, they might have a chance. They decide
on the order: Eric, Kristin, Annemarie and Charles.
First, however, is Zastudil. He whacks one (despite a
loud distraction by his teammates) 52 yards. Then it was
Team Cake's turn. Eric got 39 yards from his punt.
Kristin is confident about their chances...and boots in
16 yards. That makes 55 total, which is just enough to
TEAM CAKE: 4, TEAM
Zastudil is a little
embarrassed, but still a good sport. He even calls Team
Ex himself to let them know that #25 is done and the
game is tied yet again. Stacey is bummed, and Greg says
it's time for them to step up and get something done as
soon as possible.
3:10pm, Huntsville, AL -
It takes Team Ex all day to get out of 'Bama and head
towards Tennessee, but they're on their way thanks to
Wes of the Vipers. Since elimination is looming very
close (the next task completed by either team will
trigger it), they reflect privately on the strengths and
weaknesses of each other:
Doug: good with people
and morale, but not a good winner by any stretch
Greg: great comic relief, but he DID lose his license
and his athletic prowess hasn't been shown yet
Kerri: also funny, but that whole "losing the map"
thingy still lays heavy, not to mention her attitude
Stacie: not as innocent as she looks, but aggressive or
pro-active in the team
While Team Ex ponder
this in silence, Team Cake ponders their OWN troop out
in the open. Kristin flat out tells Eric that he's too
focused on himself and delaying the team trying to line
up other tasks when they have tasks to get to right
then. Eric thinks Annemarie hasn't be contributing much
herself. Charles thinks Eric, despite having SOME
contacts, might be more of a threat to him than the
girls. It sounds like everyone has made up their mind
who to toss. But that's for when they do their next
task, which requires a ride (by Charlene, Charles'
friend) down to D.C. to play one-on-one with a WNBA
4:20pm, Nashville, TN -
Team Exodus arrives in Nashville to complete #49:
getting the picture with the Heisman trophy and its
winner. They discuss this with Robbie Bohren, Titans'
Director of Media Relations. Along with #49, Doug
mentions another one that they could do if they can't
get Eddie George:
#16: "Catch a 35-yard
pass from a current or former Hall of Fame quarterback."
Ut-oh. Although George
is in town currently, he's heading OUT of town that day.
After all, it IS Friday afternoon and everyone's heading
out for the weekend. In fact, there's nobody in the
locker room. However, Bohren says he'd make some phone
calls and see what he can do for them. So the team stays
in the lobby and HOPES that Bohren can get George over
there briefly. Nobody's sure who they're going to vote
off the team...and it makes the wait even worse. Bohren
comes out and says that he can drive them up to George's
house and hope he's there.
So they get to his
house...and wait...and wait...and wait more. As they
waited, the painter next door, Dan Zimmerle, drives by
and asks what's up. The team begs for a meal from him,
and he's happy to oblige in getting them some fast
food...although Greg thinks Kerri is so very...pushy
when it comes to getting "super sized" meals. Doug
mentions that it was that same aggressiveness that
nearly cost them a task earlier.
5:40pm, Nashville, TN - Team Ex has been waiting for
close to an hour in front of Eddie George's house. Dan
returns...with a mess of groceries for the team! Doug is
amazed that this simple painter stepped WAY beyond the
call for total strangers. Stacie has her faith in
humanity reaffirmed by this gesture.
Not only that, but things looked up even more: Eddie
George arrived! First greeted by Bohren and given an
explanation for the stalking party, George is happy to
help them out. Both Doug and Greg feel George's
sincerity and kindness in his voice as they walk through
his house and towards his trophy room. After the team
tests out the weight of the trophy, George asks what
they would do to win. Greg says he'd "convert" and
become an Ohio State fan (which, as a Michigan fan, I
find absolutely blasphemy). George says he won't let him
do that and poses with the team holding the trophy.
TEAM EXODUS: 5, TEAM
George calls Team Cake
(who are just arriving in Arlington, it looks
like)...claiming to be "David Byner" from University of
Hawaii and have helped Team Ex to do #49. Team Exodus
thanks George and departs.
But now...the dreaded elimination. Each team member
needs to write down a name on a piece of paper and place
it in a hat. Each member then draws out of the hat and
reads the name. Majority of votes gets the gate...with
straws being drawn in case of a tie.
Team Ex goes to a nearby
field and considers their votes quietly. Greg is eyeing
Kerri for her impatience, Doug is considering Greg for
the I.D. losing, Stacey is sure it will be her and Kerri
concurs. Doug and Greg don't want to go, Kerri is cool
with it if she's voted and Stacie just thinks the whole
thing sucks. One by one, they write down their names and
drop them in the hat in the middle.
Meanwhile, Team Cake is
already writing their votes down. Kristin admits to an
unspoken "alliance" with Annemarie, but Annemarie says
anyone's fair game. Eric says Annemarie's his target.
And Charles doesn't know what ANYONE is thinking. They
drop their votes in their own hat.
Annemarie draws a paper
saying "Eric". Kristin does likewise. And Eric...draws
one that says "Eric". By a 3-1 vote (the fourth being
Annemarie), Eric is out of Team Cake...or is it "Team
Cak" now? Anyway, Eric says good-bye to the team and the
three head off to do their own task.
Back at Team Ex, they
approach the hat and draw. Greg's says "Kerri", Kerri's
says "Stacey", Doug's says "Kerri" (or, actually,
"Carrie")...and Stacey's...says "Kerri". Kerri is so
very...off the team. Stacey is upset, but Kerri
understands, knowing her losing the map cost them time.
She admits that she "f#$%ed up" and deserves to be
ousted. All she hopes is that it's not a personal issue
that she was booted. Her last aggressive demand to the
team? "You guys just win!"
6:29pm, Arlington, VA -
There's no rest for Team Cak. They're waiting outside of
the gym at the University of Washington, D.C. for the
Mystics' practice to end. Charles has been elected to
take on the WNBA All-Star. Though Kristin is scouting
the girls, Charles is wondering what he's got himself
into! Dyani Gordon of Mystics' PR comes out to greet
them and gets briefed on their task. The All-Star she's
chosen? Chamique Holdsclaw, perhaps the greatest female
basketball player in the world! When they meet,
Holdsclaw is a little intimidated by Charles' height.
But her teammates said that she'd BETTER win.
Holdsclaw's first shot
(after some slick moves) was off the mark. Charles
showed some moves of his own and got his own shot in.
From that point on, the two traded point for point. But
then Holdsclaw kicked her game into overdrive and
schooled Charles. He never recovered as Holdsclaw beat
him 7-5. Kristin and Annemarie commended Charles for his
good effort. But the fact remained that Team Cake was
not only one PLAYER short but one TASK short of Team Ex.
And that did NOT sit with Charles too well. He says that
this was a "regroup night" for the team.
Will Charles get over
the loss? Will Team Exodus begin to pull away? Who will
Eric and Kerri's surprising replacements be? Stay tuned!
July 29, 2003
Previously on BBD2, Team Exodus got on television and
had an impromptu photo shoot with Eddie George to put
them at 5 tasks complete. Team Cake managed to out-punt
an NFL punter to get to 4 tasks, but Charlie flubbed on
beating a WNBA All-Star in a one-on-one. With Team Ex
reaching 5, the elimination was upon them. Team Exodus
chose to get rid of Kerri and Team Cake ditched Eric.
After six days on the road, the teams are haggard and
worn, wondering who will replace their eliminated
Day 6, 7:50pm,
Nashville, TN - What's left of Team Exodus is making
their way to the Opryland Hotel. They don't have a place
to sleep tonight, but they feel so much more peaceful
now that Kerri is out. Stacey feels sorry to have sent
her off, but Doug feels they HAD to do it to keep the
sanity of the group alive. Greg agrees, though, that her
fearlessness and the way she, eventually, got her way
most times, was helpful.
But, for now, to the immediate need. They head for the
main desk of the Opryland, hoping to shmooze the clerk
into letting them have a room for the night. The clerk
is unable to do so; the most she can do is give them an
"employee discount rate". All they need is someone to
fit the bill. So, the team meanders around the lobby
looking for chumps...er, generous people to pay for
their room. They come across a group of "young
professionals" and help take their picture. This sparks
a conversation, which leads to them asking one of them,
Lisa by name, to spring for the fee. Lisa, upon hearing
their plight, agrees to give them ONE room at the
employee rate. Doug is amazed how easily they got the
room without Kerri's persistent mannerisms. Greg agrees
that they don't need Kerri anymore. Stacey is looking
forward to the "new girl" coming to their team in the
next day or two.
7:20pm, Arlington, VA -
While Team Ex calls it a day, Team Cak...er, Cake is
still bumming over Charlie losing to the WNBA All-Star.
The girls believe the new player, whenever he or she
arrives, will help them immensely to get back in the
game. For now, though, Charles' friend picks them up and
drives them to just outside Baltimore, where they could
get Run of the House at the residence of Kwame,
Annemarie's friend. Everyone is exhausted and Stacey,
while surfing the internet, says that they MUST get
something done the next day to lift the team's spirits.
Day 7, 6:30am,
Nashville, TN - Team Exodus awakens at the Opryland.
Everyone is looking forward to getting a new teammate.
Greg hopes it's someone who cares more about the team's
welfare than their looks, Doug thinks it should be able
to blend in quickly. Stacey...wants someone like Kerri.
Once they get dressed, they look around the hotel...and
notice that there seems to be a convention of
middle-aged ladies wearing purple clothing and red
hats...and Greg is a bit appalled by some of these
ladies walking around in such wardrobe.
But, now, it was time to
return to work. They had already done a task in
Tennessee, so they needed to get to another state and
get another task done. One thing they looked at is:
#19: "One member must
box an entire round with a female professional boxer"
(The task on ESPN's website says Tanya Harding
qualifies...but who wants to sink THAT low, right?)
After some research,
they find there are a grand total of TWO pro female
boxers in all of Kentucky...and one of them is in
Lexington. So, now, the team begs around for a ride to
Lexington, hoping that the good mood tourists are in
while on vacation will score them a ride. Doug talks to
two such guests, Debra and Melissa, about a ride. As it
turns out, they have to drive by the city anyway en
route to West Virginia, so they'll be happy to bring
them that far.
8:30am, Silver Springs,
MD - Team Cake awakens at Kwame's house. Their first
goal of the day is to get a ride to Washington, D.C.
Specifically, their goal is the Capitol Building, where
awaits the second of five Subaru Bajas at five different
locales across the country. Annemarie's friend, Joe,
meets them at the house and gets convinced to take them
into D.C. Kristin, while proclaiming how thankful she is
since she doesn't have to carry any of Eric's stuff
anymore, reviews the plan: get the Subaru, make a
bee-line to Cleveland, hopefully get a task done there
with the Indians, then get to Chicago...where Stacey
says they NEED to be in 3 days. They get to the Capitol,
get the Subaru, and make tracks to Cleveland.
2:40pm, Lexington, KY -
Team Exodus gets dropped off at Ford's Fitness Center
with the hope of talking pro boxer Julia Day and get to
throw punches with her for a round. They had contacted
Julia earlier at the gym, where she worked, and were
told to talk to her manager, Gerald Reed, about
accepting this task. Gerald was being inconspicuous when
they spot him. Doug approaches him and tells him about
the task. The first question out of Gerald's lips is,
"What's the benefit for her?" Greg knew at that point
that Gerald was very protective about her boxer...and
wasn't about to let her risk injury for "fun" without a
damn good reason. Gerald even tells the team that Julia
didn't really want to do the task with them last he
spoke with her. The boys continue to press on, though,
saying it would be good for Julia's career (particularly
to box on ESPN), but Gerald sees through the B.S. and
walks away. The team thinks they're whole reason for
coming to Kentucky is down the tubes.
Twenty minutes later,
however, the team is talking to Gerald again, this time
a bit more genteel. They speak down-to-Earth with him,
saying it would really help their cause if they can make
this happen. After some thinking, Gerald says he'll talk
to Julia and see if she really wants to do it. Some time
later, Gerald comes back and says she's willing. The
problem is that the gym doesn't have a boxing ring.
There's one in a gym up the street, but its owner may
not be there. So Gerald says he'll call said owner up
and see what happens.
But hold the phone...Team Ex gets word that they'll be
receiving their new teammate before they head to the
ring, so the team, eager to met "her" (as they say),
heads out of the gym and wait...hoping "she" can blend
in and see what angle they're taking to win this game.
And Team Exodus' new
teammate...is ERIC, formerly from Team Cake! (oh, and
who didn't see THAT coming?)
There was Eric, exiled
from Team Cake, thinking he was heading back
home...before he was told that the race isn't over for
him and that he'd be Kerri's replacement. Dang...and
they were thinking it was going to be a girl. Doug feels
that Eric can blend in just fine, seeing as how he's not
shy. Eric is happy to be supported again. Doug knows
Eric's a better athlete than Kerri...and pities Team
Cake for the disadvantage they've been handed. (See, he
already knows who Eric's replacement is...)
So back into the gym the
new Team Exodus goes to talk with Gerald and Julia. More
good news: Gerald contacted the gym and the owner will
let them box. Furthermore, Gerald drives them all over.
Doug and Julie warm up for the fight. Julie is a LITTLE
worried, but thinks she's in for a good fight. Eric, at
first, thinks Doug can take him...but gets worried
himself as the warm-ups resume. Doug eggs him on with
corny clichés like "putting lipstick on a pig" and other
junk from the Rocky films. Finally, it's time for the
In Team Ex's corner,
fighting out of San Francisco, California, a former
college boxer, Do-o-o-o-o-oug La-a-a-a-andis! And, in
Gerald's corner, from the great state of Kentucky,
professional boxer, Juli-i-i-i-ie Da-a-a-a-a-a-a-ay!
L-l-l-l-l-let's get ready to rumbl-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-le!
Doug is shaking as Julie
gets psyched up for this one-round bout. All Doug has to
do is not get KOed in three minutes and Team Ex takes a
two-task lead. The bell sounds, and the two combatants
circled. Julie started throwing jabs to Doug's
head...and only THEN does Doug realize she'd fighting
for real. He answers with a few shots of his own, but
Julie gets him on the run. Julie tries for a knockout
jab, but Doug sees it and dodges it. Two minutes into
the round, Doug gets nailed in the ear by a blow (but
the headgear they both wear prevents his ear from
becoming a cauliflower). Julie wails on Doug from there
on...until the bell sounds to end the round and the
TEAM EXODUS: 6, TEAM
And, now, a special surprise. Having completed half of
the total maximum number of tasks, BOTH teams are
treated to a free McDonald's meal! Team Ex gets their
"halftime" meal at the local McD and works out their
next plan: find a ride and haul to Cincinnati to get
hooked up with another task. Doug's friends were able to
Day 7, 8:15, Pittsburgh,
PA - And, as you might have guessed, Team Cake's newest
team member is KERRI from Team Ex. (So...that makes it
"Team Cakk"?) She leaps out of nowhere while the others
were having their Mickey D meal...and, as far as
Annemarie is concerned, it was no longer a "Happy Meal".
She is both shocked and POed at this hyper girl's part
of their team. Charlie and Stacey try to talk to her and
get the air purified between her and Kerri.
And, now, the WORSE
news: Team Ex calls to inform them that task #19 is done
and done and that it's a two-task lead now. But Kerri
gets on the phone and tells them it's ironic that she
performed an "exodus" from her own team! The new team
get into the Subaru and head out en route to Cleveland.
Charlie is all about accepting Kerri into the
team...and, to that end, gets Kristin and Annemarie to
tell her that Kerri is so very...NOT welcomed by her.
But Kerri understands the unpleasant things said about
her. In fact, Kerri didn't particularly care being
teammates with Kristin, either. But, hey, they're there
now and they have to move on and continue with their
trek to Mt. Rushmore. No matter what they feel about
each other, they have ground to make up.
Finally, they arrive at
Cleveland. Charlie's friend allows them Run of the
House...as long as they "keep it clean". As the team
settled in for the night, Kerri hopped into the bed with
Charlie (Kristin and Annemarie were happy with the floor
in the bedroom) and showed off the MASSIVE bruise on her
ass and thigh she got from Team Ex's first task.
(Remember when she cannonballed off the 10-meter
platform?) Kristin can't believe that she'd be voted off
the team that she took that bruise for. Kerri jokes
about it, though, asking Charlie to smack her OTHER
thigh hard so she can have a matching pair. She claims
to have liked Charlie from the first day. Meanwhile,
Annemarie and Kristin stage their OWN mock PG-13 scene
under THEIR blanket. They stay up until past 2am before
finally zoning out.
Day 8, 8:20am,
Cincinnati, OH - Team Ex had, obviously, made it to "Cin
City" and was staying at...someone's house...friend of
Doug's, most likely. Eric is glad that his new team has
accepted him so readily. The rest of the team is willing
to make this work...mainly because they can't eliminate
But, anyhow, on to today's task. With the Bengals around
for mini-camp, it looks like they might be able to pull
off a football-related task:
#45: "McDonald's Reward:
Dump Gatorade(TM) on a past or present NFL coach"
Marvin Lewis is the new head coach of the Bengals...so
why NOT give him his first official Gatorade(TM) bath?
So they get driven by two more of Doug's friends first
to Paul Brown Stadium to speak with Jack Brennan, the
Bengals' PR Manager. Traditionally, the PR guys have
been VERY helpful. A security guard, Aaron, greets the
team and agrees to get Brennan. Eric, as always, is
eager to get the task over with and get on with the next
one, but there's a method to his mania. Eric wants a few
players on their side to push Brennan and the coach into
letting this task happen, but Doug explained that they
must go through PR like always. Greg is already seeing
shades of Kerri in Eric.
Out comes Brennan, who
gets the task explained to him. The problem is that
Coach Lewis is tied up in preparation and practice for
at least two hours. However, Brennan says he'll give the
message to the coach and see what happens. As Brennan
leaves, Greg assures the team that there's no way he'll
leave them hanging for two hours if the coach doesn't
want to help. Doug thinks it'll take no later than 40
minutes, since the players leave practice around that
time . So...they wait. Sure enough, close to an hour
later, the players start filing out of the stadium and
towards the practice facility...including Coach Lewis.
But they don't approach the coach, putting faith in
Brennan that he'll pull through for them. Eric has to
bite his tongue as he watches the whole team pass by,
not wanting to step on any toes.
9:23am, Cleveland, OH -
Meanwhile, in the city of Paul Brown's OTHER franchise,
Team Cakk...er, Cake awakens...to Kerri's "glory, glory,
glory" chant. But that can't deter them. They have a
task to do. Kerri stops the first car she sees and asks
the lady behind the wheel if she can take the team
towards Jacobs Field, home of the Cleveland Native Ame...er,
Indians. (Sorry...sometimes PC just comes automatically
to me.) The lady agrees, the team hops in and they're on
their way. Charlie is impressed at how Kerri's
aggressiveness is already paying dividends.
Team Cake has not one,
not two, not four, but THREE options for tasks at the
#14: "Subaru Reward:
Turn a double play with (David) Eckstein, Nomar (Garciaparra),
'A-Rod' (Alex Rodridgez) or (Miguel) Tejada."
#4: "McDonald's Reward: Get a bat from a Major League
Baseball All-Star and get a hit during batting practice
(max 10 swings)"
#50: "McDonald's Reward: Sell 100 hot dogs at an MLB
stadium, and one teammate must eat one for every 10
When they get to the
stadium, they decide to go to the executive offices,
hoping they can help get them on the field for either
batting practice. Kerri takes control (as always) and
get on the phone with Indians' PR at the office. She
explains that all they need is to hit one fastball out
of the infield and they'll be on their way. The agent on
the line says he'd call right back with an answer. And
the eventual answer is "no". Had they arrived earlier,
maybe. But they can't disrupt these athlete in the
middle of their practice.
On to Plan B. Cleveland is hosting the Texas Rangers
today, which includes A-Rod. Back on the phone goes
Kerri, this time asking for just that, adding that the
Subaru will be theirs if they can do it. But, again, the
answer is "no". He WANTS to help them, but he just can't
allow them on the field during practice. The last chance
was #50...and THIS one, the PR group seems all right
with them doing, since the timing really doesn't matter
in this case. So they head to the second floor and meet
up with Charlie Henningsen, GM of Sports Service who
runs some of the concession stands at Jacobs Field. The
team elects Charlie and his big appetite to sell and eat
the hot dogs while Kerri, Kristin and Annemarie corral
potential customers to him. So, one by one, they plead
with patrons to buy their wieners and get them to their
goal. Kerri even tries to goad one guy to buy one for
HER. When they hit 54, Charlie devours his first five,
buns and all.
By 4:20pm, Charlie sells his 100-dog allotment. Now he
just needs to consume five more. However, the FIRST five
were coming back to haunt him, particularly the third
one he put onions on. The sixth one makes him feel sick
from the first bite...and his stomach's already full.
But, somehow, he chokes down #7...then #8...then
#9...then finally gets #10 down the gullet. Needless to
say, Charlie will probably never eat hot dogs again! But
it doesn't matter; Team Cake is back in the hunt!
TEAM CAKE: 5, TEAM EXODUS: 6
4:40pm, Cincinnati, OH - Meanwhile, Team Ex finally gets
the call from Brennan. Coach Lewis doesn't feel it's
right for someone to dump Gatorade(TM) on him unless
it's after a Bengals win. This, to say the least, floors
the team. Stacey is POed that the coach would be so
selfish and that they've wasted time for nothing. What's
more, they get the call from Team Cake that they've
completed THEIR fifth task, so it's imperative to get
back that two-task lead.
But all is not lost! They find a Plan B:
#24: "Get your photo taken on a horse in the winner's
circle after a race"
There's a small racetrack not far from the practice
facility. Not exactly Churchill Downs, but a horse track
is a horse track, of course, of course. So off they go!
Eric is glad his new team has a back-up plan, something
his OLD team couldn't get the grasp of having.
5:04pm, Cleveland, OH - Meanwhile, back at the Mistake
on the Lake, Team Cake (after Charlie forced down some
Pepto, I'm sure) starts to worry about where they were
going to sleep and how they were going to get to
Chicago. They felt "homeless" for the first time in the
That's when they ran into Troy, a nightclub manager. He
asks the team what's going on and the team explain
themselves. Troy then agrees to drive them to his club,
which specialized in...ahem..."adult entertainment",
shall we say. Annemarie is more blunt, saying that it's
a "strip club" and that she is NOT happy. Kerri,
however, is so very...uninhibited! She even takes off
her pants and climbs the go-go pole on the stage.
Kristin wasn't too happy, either, but she sucks it up
because of all Charlie has accomplished for the team
from the beginning. Annemarie steps into a back room
away from the "action", angry that they would be wasting
time when they had a race to win. She's ready to just
call it quits and go home. She was the only one
complaining, though, as the others enjoyed watching the
5:22pm, Cincinnati, OH - Meanwhile, back at the Queen
City, Doug's friends get them to Riverdowns Racebook.
They immediately go to a PR guy at the track and
explained the situation. John Engelhardt, head of PR
there, said it wouldn't be a problem. Well,...actually,
there's ONE problem. See, it's the last race of the
day...and it's just starting! The horse will be in the
Winner's Circle within a few minutes! They have to get
to the Circle before the horse is taken back to the
stables and the opportunity is lost for the whole day!
So the race in on, both on and off the track!
Will Team Cake be able to deal with Kerri and catch-up?
Will Team Ex horse around successfully and deal with
Eric's inclusion? Will there be any hope for a BBD3 now
that the show's been moved to the graveyard shift? Stay
August 5, 2003
Previously on BBD2, the teams get their new
teammates...which happened to be the ones eliminated
from the opposing team. Eric is added to Team Exodus and
Kerri to Team Cake. Team Ex took a two-task lead after
Doug got the $#|+ beaten out of him by a profession
women's boxer, but Team Cake worked their way back when
Charlie sold 100 hot dogs at a Cleveland Indians
game...then had the stomach (literally) to eat 10. While
Team Cake chills at a strip club, Team Ex is racing in
Cincinnati to win a horse race against a horse race.
Day 8, 5:22pm, Cincinnati, OH - What the hell did I just
say? Team Exodus is at the Riverdowns Racebook horse
track. Their hope is to complete a task:
#24: "Get your photo taken with a horse in the Winner's
Circle after a race"
But, though John Engelhardt, head of PR there, is happy
to help, the last race of the day just started and the
team has to run towards the Winner's Circle in the hope
that they make it before the last winning horse leaves
the Circle. So they sprint to the track and make it to
the rail just as the eventual winner, Mr. Cody, runs by.
Eric starts getting a bit nervous, since Mr. Cody's
owners may not want the team to fuss with the horse. But
they make it to the Winner's Circle just as the horse is
coming in. But Mr. Cody is NOT the most calm of horses.
He looks ready to kick Greg in...somewhere vital. Still,
the four lined up, showing the map. The picture is
snapped...and Team Ex is back in a two-task lead!
TEAM EXODUS: 7, TEAM CAKE: 5
Greg is not sure how it happened, but he's glad it did.
Now it's off to Indianapolis, courtesy of their
"chauffeurs", Doug's friends.
7:30pm, Indianapolis, IN - They arrive at the house of
Gabriel, a friend of Eric's. They can only get one favor
because of the 1-1-12 rule. They decide, instead of
getting Run of the House from him as originally planned,
they'd make him their chauffeur around Indianapolis the
next day. Then they ask him where they can stay...and
Gabriel suggests the neighbors across the street. The
thing is that Gabriel and said neighbor, Tim, don't know
each other that well, which makes this a HUGE favor to
be asked. Once Eric explains the situation to Tim,
however, he permits them Run of the House. Doug's faith
in humanity is once again restored due to the kindness
of strangers during this race. As the team relaxes with
a thunderstorm creeping in, Greg is anxious to get
another task done tomorrow, but grateful for the time to
relax after so many miles on the road.
Cleveland, OH - Earlier in the day, while Team Ex was
playing horsey, Team Cake is enjoying the sights and
sounds of Troy's nightclub. Well,...THREE of them are
enjoying and/or tolerating it, anyway. Annemarie is
still quite angry. However, she didn't hold a grudge.
What kills the whole mood of the team is that Team Ex
calls, saying to scratch #24 from the list. They decide
to depart and Troy gives them a ride to Toledo. There,
they meet with Charles' friend Donnie, and she agrees to
take the team to Chicago. The trip was a soggy one (that
thunderstorm Team Ex slept through hit there as well),
but Charles remains optimistic.
They arrive at the house of Charles' best friend's
mother, Sandy, just outside of Chicago. The house is big
and beautiful, and it's all theirs for 12 hours. Sandy
is very helpful and accommodating, even going as far as
to wash their clothes. Everyone is grateful to Sandy,
but are so tired they pretty much go right to sleep.
Day eight ends with Team Ex ahead by two.
Day 9, 8:05am, Chicago, IL - Sandy treats Team Cake to a
big breakfast of pancake and bacon. Kristin thinks
Sandy's much like everyone's mom and that this night and
morning was very much like being home again. During
breakfast, they get the map out and work out a strategy
for the day. It includes:
#21: "Get a picture with one of the nets that got cut
down by any of the 4 teams that went to the Final Four
in 2003 (those being Kansas, Marquette, Syracuse and
Marquette is just a stone's throw away from Chicago up
in Wisconsin. They can do that task, then head BACK to
Chicago to complete something with the Cubs. Now the
BETTER news: Sandy's stepbrother, Bob, has given the
team his car to use for the day. So they head out the
door, into the car and off to Wisconsin.
When they get close to Milwaukee, though, they hit a
toll booth. This is a problem, since the team is not
allowed to handle money at any time. Normally, people
who don't pay tolls get tickets...and any criminal act
would disqualify them from the race. So they get up to
the toll booth and one of the girls says that their
luggage was lost at the airport, including all their
money. The operator seems sympathetic and lets them go.
Charlie is happy that the girls handled the situation,
using their "charms", as it were. Kerri agrees that
having a 3-to-1 female ratio will help them get more
done. They do a trick again at ANOTHER toll booth (what
the hell they're doing on a toll road is beyond me) and
Kerri's performance gets them by again, claiming all
their money went for gas. (You sure they changed the
name from 'Beg, Borrow and B.S.'? Looks like B.S.ing is
in full swing here.)
9:05am, Indianapolis, IN
- While Team Cake starts on the road to Marquette, Team
Exodus awaken refreshed and certain that they can get a
task done in the city, since it has many, many sports
opportunities. They consider:
#9: "Beat a WNBA All-Star in a game of one-on-one (first
to 7 baskets wins)"
#12: "Subaru Reward: Make a lay-up, a free-throw and a
3-pointer in 20 seconds on an NBA court with an NBA
player keeping time"
Between the NBA Pacers and the WNBA Fever, they should
have no trouble getting a task. So they get driven by
Gabriel to downtown Indianapolis and Conseco Fieldhouse,
home of the Pacers and Fever. They speak to the Guest
Relations desk clerk, who called the PR manager about
the tasks. While waiting, who should walk by but Isiah
Thomas, former basketball great and coach of the Pacers?
After handshakes, the team explains about task #12. But
Isiah can't seem to help, since he doesn't know if any
of the players are in town. He wishes them well, though,
as he heads off.
Out comes David Benner, PR guy for the Pacers. Doug
explains task #12...but Benner says it's not likely at
all, since the Pacers had just been beaten in the NBA
playoffs and are feeling rather angry with themselves.
So Doug tosses Plan B at Benner: task #9. The Fever is,
in fact, practicing inside and Benner says he'll talk to
the FEVER's PR guy and hopefully something can happen. A
short time later, Benner comes back with Kevin
Messenger, aforementioned PR guy. When HE gets the spin
about task #9, he says he MIGHT be able to swing
it...but the team has to wait until practice concludes
around 2pm. The team says they'll wait...and so they do.
12:42pm, Milwaukee, WI - Team Cake arrives at Marquette
University. They make their way to the athletics
building and talk to Barb Kellaher, Coordinator of
Marquette Men's Basketball about the task. Kellaher says
that the net is usually in the head coach's office...and
that no coaches are around at this time. Charles is very
pessimistic, thinking they drove all this way for
However, Kellaher agrees to call Bill Cords, the
university's Athletic Director. When he's explained of
the task, he says he'd try to find a piece of the net in
the building. Now they need a starting player to take
the picture with since the head coach is unavailable.
Kellaher calls starting forward Scott Merritt, who was
just en route AWAY from Marquette. Kellaher asks him to
make a U-turn and take the quick picture. He consents,
which sends the team into throes of joy. Even better:
Cords returns with one string from the net cut down when
Marquette made the Final Four. Merritt shows up and
shakes hands with everyone. They finagle someone passing
by to use their camera, get in position, hold up the
strand of the net and...CLICK!
TEAM CAKE: 6, TEAM EXODUS 7
Kerri is so very...hyped that it took a mere 25 minutes
to get the task done. They call Team Ex to let them know
that #21 is off limits. And Team Ex is not too
happy...especially Greg who lives within walking
distance of Marquette. "Damn it, those are MY peeps," he
says. "They're supposed to take care of ME, not them!"
Stacey notes that Team Cake always seems to call at the
worst possible moment for Team Ex. So, after a
begged-for small meal, the Team waits around so more,
hoping Messenger will come back and let them try out the
one-on-one. Close to 3pm, Messenger arrives...and says
it's probably not going to happen since the Fever is
still in intense practice. Stacey suggests that he just
bring them to the players so that they can explain it to
them up-front. Messenger leaves to try and work this out
while the team is feeling bummed. Stacey feels like the
odd man...er, woman out amid the team, and Greg
Finally, Messenger waves Team Exodus to the elevators to
bring them to where the Fever finished practicing. They
talk to some of the Fever team members and head coach
Nell Fortner and explain the task. Natalie Williams
agrees to go one-on-one with Greg in the task that
Charles failed recently. The game is tight all the way,
with Williams and Greg trading points. Greg is very
aggressive on defense since Williams is tired from
practice. Soon, however, it's 6-6. Greg misses a
shot...then strips the ball from Williams...then misses
another...then gets shoved by Williams back towards the
net, allowing her to score the deciding point. Team Ex
The team is POed big time. Doug contracts Tourettes
Syndrome and swears about wasting a day in Indiana. Now
they have to go into the Meet & Compete up only by one.
Oh, yeah...remember when Kristin said they HAD to be in
Chicago by Day 10? Well, there's a reason to that. On
Day 10, both teams are to meet IN Chicago for a
head-to-head challenge called Meet & Compete. More on
Everyone is upset...particularly Stacey, who feels he's
on a team of guys who like to hear themselves talk. The
team decides to get out of Indiana and make their way to
Chicago with Gabriel's help. They may not get a task
done before Day 10, but they need to regroup.
3:10pm, en route to Chicago, IL - While Team Ex was
getting slam dunked, Team Cake makes its way to Lake
Forest, Illinois, where the Chicago Bears train. Their
#16: "Catch a 35-yard pass from a current or former Hall
of Fame or All-Pro quarterback (3 tries max, all members
must catch and must wear a helmet)"
So they get to the camp and get a cell phone from a
security guard to call Bears PR man Scott Hagel. Once
the task is explained, Hagel explains that nobody's
around town today. However, he agrees to meet with them
and see about setting something up. He wanted to see
about getting Jim McMahon (Bears QB in '85) or Chris
Chandler (current Bears' QB), since they're the only two
in-state. The team says they'll call tomorrow morning to
see what happens.
But the team is not about to sit and wait. The day is
still relatively young, so they head for Wrigley Field
in downtown Chicago. If Da Bears can't help, perhaps the
Cubbies could. Specifically, they hope to accomplish:
#46: "Lead 'Take Me Out To The Ballgame' at a Cubs home
The Cubs are hosting the Brewers today. But the Cubs' PR
will NOT be hosting Team Cake at all. In several phone
calls before they arrived at the stadium, the firm
refused to meet with them, saying over the phone that it
isn't going to happen. The team decides to go to the
stadium anyway and see about talking to them
face-to-face. As they stand around, Kristin and Kerri
talk rather vocally about how things are falling apart
on them. They so much want to tie the score before the
Meet & Compete tomorrow. Kerri is mad that they don't
have a back-up plan. And Annemarie...she sits quietly,
enduring the tirade, thinking it couldn't possibly get
And where's Charles, you ask? Making things worse! He
parked Bob's car at a 7-Eleven nearby the ballpark
briefly (apparently under a sign warning about dire
consequences for parking there). Two minutes later,
after telling the team where he was, he returns...to
find the back left tire has been "booted", meaning it
has a lock on it and cannot move. This upsets the team
to no end, since it'll take $100 or so to un-boot the
tire before it gets towed.
Ah, but it's darkest before dawn. Across the street from
the 7-Eleven is a bar called "Hi-Tops". Charles thinks
this would be a good place to beg for the money. The
manager is more than happy to help them out. In fact, he
goes several extra miles, allowing them to eat, drink
and relax at the bar while things are worked out. The
team parties hardy at the bar, and a page allows them to
her place to take Run of the House before the Meet &
Compete. So get a free taxi ride to her place and are
feeling very confident about the head-to-head. Charles
says it firmly: "We...will...not...lose!"
10:54, Chicago, IL - While Team Cake is in a festive
mood, Team Exodus is not so festive as THEY arrive in
Chi-Town. Eric's buddy Clay is asked if they can stay at
his apartment for the night. But it's actually Clay's
GIRLFRIEND's apartment, and they needed to get up early.
Besides she wasn't feeling well. Eric calls said
girlfriend to confirm this. Team Ex is S.O.L. and out on
the street. Doug is angry that they've accomplished
nothing today...and that now they're this close to
sleeping on the sidewalk for the night.
Finally, Doug calls a friend of his in Deerfield, close
to the Chicago's training facility. Eric feels the Meet
& Compete will be a physical challenge and they need to
rest up to beat Team Cake. Doug's friends says it's OK
to stay with him...as long as he's up there real soon.
Doug calls his brother's girlfriend to arrange a ride to
Deerfield. They get to the house, the boys very
optimistic...while Stacey feels that Team Cake has the
chance to catch up and take the game from them.
Nine days have passed and Exodus leads Cake 7-6.
Day 10, 8:09am, Chicago, IL - Team Cake arises and
readies themselves for the Meet & Compete. The girls get
showers and make-up. Kristin feels Kerri is a LITTLE
nervous about meeting her old teammates. Kerri is only
concerned that Team Ex has a 3-1 guy ratio and, if the
competition is physical, her team is screwed.
Team Exodus awakens around the same time. Greg notes
that Stacey feels a bit "smothered" by Doug during this
race. He's been insisting she sleep next to or closest
to him. Stacey says they seemed similar at the start but
that feeling has already waned. Both Eric and Greg feel
this has got to end, for the sake of the team if nothing
Both teams arrive at the Chicago Bulls training facility
just outside Chicago. Host Summer Sanders greets the
teams and introduces them to Jay Williams, guard on the
Bulls. They explain that this is not an official
task...but it DOES offer a double reward: the use of a
Subaru Baja for 12 hours AND a free meal at McDonalds!
The sport is basketball and the event is the best
1) Free-throw shooting contest (first team to 10 baskets
2) A mass game of P.I.G. (which is like H.O.R.S.E.) with
Williams likewise playing along
3) Blind Man's Bluff (playing basketball blindfolded (if
First came the free- throw contest. Greg and Charles,
the two that failed to defeat WNBA players, decide to
avenge themselves. The other team members surround the
key at either side of the court to pass the balls to
their shooters. At the signal, they started shooting.
Summer counts for Team Ex while Jay counts for Team
Cake. It's close all the way, but Greg makes the final
crucial shot to win 10-9 and take a one-nil lead in
events. Charles is angry as anything and hopes they can
even the score at P.I.G.
For those who never played H.O.R.S.E. or P.I.G., one
player does a basketball shot. If the ball goes in, the
other player(s) have to make the same shot or earn a
letter (starting with H or P, depending on the game). If
the ball does NOT go in and the other player (or one of
the other players) MAKES the shot, the first player gets
a letter. If a player gets to HORSE or PIG, s/he is out.
Last one standing wins.
All eight players AND Jay Williams played. Kristin,
Kerri and Doug were the earliest to be eliminated.
Stacey gets excited to make Charles get a "P". Eric and
Annemarie bail as well leaving, in order of shooting,
Williams, Greg, Stacey and Charles. Stacey exploits a
weak point in the court and knocks Charles out. She goes
on to beat Greg and even Williams. She wins the P.I.G.
contest and seals the victory for Team Ex! Summer
immediately brought them to their Baja, where they
tossed their stuf in and made tracks to return to the
Team Cake, on the other hand, is left stranded and
angry. They want to get back to Wrigley Field, but they
don't have a ride. But Jay Williams is a friend of
Charles from their Duke days (not to mention he loves
BBD and wants to be a bigger part of it), so he offers
them his limo to get to the north side of Chicago. So
they head for the home of the Cubs and hope for better
luck than last time.
12:22pm, outside Chicago, IL - Meanwhile, Team Ex has a
plan...the SAME plan Team Cake had yesterday. They take
their Subaru and head up to Lake Forest in order to
complete task #16: catching the 35-yard pass from a
Hall-of-Famer or All-Pro QB. Scott Hagel looks amazed to
find ANOTHER group of four at the Bears' doorstep asking
him for help with a task. Again, he says that nobody's
around to help. But THIS time, he gives them a cell
phone to call Chris Chandler, All-Pro QB for the Bears.
Stacey explains the task to Chandler, and the QB says
he'll be there in about an hour. So, rather that
lollygag around, the team heads to the nearest
McDonald's to enjoy their free meal for winning the Meet
An hour later, they return to the facility and meet up
with Chandler (and his two daughter) at the Walter
Payton Center to complete the task. First thing,
however, is to make sure everyone can CATCH a 35-yard
pass, even if it's not from Chandler. Stacey had the
toughest time at first...but then she ran off a string
of completions that made them confident enough to start
the task. Stacey was designated first...and she thinks
it's so they don't have the weakest person last to
disappoint the team. So Stacey dons the helmet, goes
into the end zone and waits for Chandler to toss it from
the 35-yard line. The first pass goes over Stacey's head
and through her outstretched arms. The second is more on
target, but she can't hold on to it and even falls back
on her...pride. She has one more shot or the task is
failed. Doug thinks a tactical error was made in letting
Stacey go first. Chandler tosses...and Stacey
"shoestring catch"es it...but it slips out of her hands.
Doug thinks it's a touchdown...but, after further
review, the ESPN officials watching declared it an
incomplete pass...and the task is failed.
Ah, well. The team seems to like Chicago enough and are
more comfy with their lead that they ask Chandler to
come back tomorrow so they can try again (guess there's
no rule stating you can't try a task more than once).
Chandler is happy to return at 10am tomorrow and
help...and even says she'll give Stacey a helmet with a
different face mask so she can see better. The team
thanks Chandler and departs, bloodied but unbowed.
Will Team Exodus get the task done? Will Team Cake beat
them to it? Can Kerri and Kristin share a team without
driving each other CRAZY?! Stay tuned!
August 12, 2003
Previously on BBD2, Team Exodus managed to get a picture
with a horse but nothing more, losing a game against a
women's basketball player and failing to catch a 35-yard
pass from Chicago Bears' QB Chris Chandler. However,
they have an appointment for the next day to try again.
They DID win the Meet & Compete challenge in Chicago
against Team Cake, who is LIKEWISE having troubles. Team
Cake's troubles were in finding tasks to DO, not just
attempting them...although they DID get a picture with
Marquette's Final Four net to keep it a one-task game.
As Team Ex departs the Bears' training camp, Team Cake
is heading back to Wrigley Field to try and get
Day 10, 4:20pm, Lake Forest, IL - Team Exodus departs
the Walter Payton Center, a little put off that they
could follow through on a task:
#16: "Catch a 35-yard pass from a current or former Hall
of Fame or All-Pro quarterback (3 tries max, all members
must catch and must wear a helmet)"
However, Chris Chandler sets a time with them tomorrow
to try it again. They still had some time left to use
the Subaru Baja they won 12 hours' use of for winning
the Meet & Compete earlier in the day, so the plan is to
head up to Milwaukee (Greg's hometown), find a place to
stay, get a car from Greg's friend and come back
tomorrow morning to try again.
4:40pm, Chicago, IL - Meanwhile, the defeated Team Cake
has taken a limo (provided by Chicago Bulls' star Jay
Williams) back to Wrigley Field, where they hope to try
a baseball-related task. But the PR guys are just as
tightwad as yesterday. Despite all the ranting and
raving by Kerri and Kristin, the chances of them getting
onto the field or into a broadcast booth or ANYWHERE in
Wrigley Field without buying a ticket were slim and
none...and "slim" just hopped on the "El". Charles
mentions that the girls were ready to strip to get
inside the stadium (Chuck, didn't you have ENOUGH of
strippers a few days ago?). Their last ditch effort was
to hang by the players' entrance to beg the players to
let them in. Kerri says she needs her "t*ttie shirt" to
convince the players. She rolls up her own shirt and
even asks Annemarie to borrow some socks to...accentuate
Finally, they leave. Kristin is angry that Wrigley is
"like Fort Knox" to them: there was no way they could
get in. Tired, hungry and exhausted, the team schleps
over the local tavern, the Cubby Bear, to beg for a
meal. The owner seems to understand and puts them up
with some food and drink. While waiting for the grub,
the team discuss other tasks to do. One resurfaced from
#34: "Swim a 200-meter Individual Medley (50 meters each
of butterfly, backstroke, breaststroke and freestyle) in
an Olympic-sized pool (50 meters long) in under four
Remember when Charles couldn't hack the breaststroke?
Well, they consider trying again. The nearest place they
can think of to do it is Northwestern University (NCAA
championship pools qualify, as long as it's 50 meters in
length), but they need to get there. One of the servers
manages to talk the boss into letting him leave early so
that he can help with that.
The server drives them the relatively short distance to
Northwestern, where the team goes to the Aquatics Center
and explain to the front desk about their task. The man
at the desk says he can't approve of them diving into
the pool, but he goes to search for swimming coaches to
GET the approval. Not very long afterwards, he returns
with the bad news: neither men's nor women's head
coaches are there and the one coach that IS at the pool
can't let them in.
So, upon failing that, they check back with Scott Hagel,
PR guy for the Bears (you'd think he'd be getting angry
at being bothered by these eight people time and again).
Hagel lets Team Cake in on a little surprise: Team
Exodus left a few hours before after FAILING the task
and that Chandler would be there. Hagel then acts
democratically: he says whosoever gets to the facility
first tomorrow gets first crack at completing the task.
Charles insists that they get there even if they have to
wake at the crack of dawn. So the server drives them
back to Chicago to stay with "friends of a friend of a
friend of a friend" of Charles', Josh and Darren. They
get Run of the House over their apartment, but all they
do is eat a little and catch some sleep. It's going to
be a LONG day tomorrow.
8:4pm, Milwaukee, WI - While Team Cake collapses, Team
Ex arrives in the Beer Capital of the U.S., and Greg
shows them around the town. First order is to get to
Mike's place, Mike being a friend of Greg's. Once they
get there, next up is a drink, paid for by another
friend of Greg's. According to him, they HAVE to drink
some beer because "if you leave this state without
having a beer, they send you a ticket in the mail."
So they knock on Mike's door, and Kerri, in her usual
tact, says to him, "I was wondering if I could sleep
with you tonight?" Mike, after a good laugh, invites
them in and give them Run of the House. There's also a
connection here. Remember Amy from Orlando, the one the
team spent the night they losing the map with? Well,
Mike is Amy's brother! Nepotism's a wonderful thing,
ain't it? Anyway, after dropping off their bags, the
team, Mike and a few other friends of Greg's head out
for a couple of drinks. During the night, Stacey goes
WILD, hopping up onto the bar (at Doug's insistence) and
dancing all around, shaking what her momma gave her.
Eric even shows off the Detroit Tigers tattoo he got
with Team Cake to finish their first task over a week
After a while, they head back to Mike's and sleep it
off. Day 10 ends without change; it's still 7-to-6, Team
Ex in the lead.
Day 11, 6:03am, Chicago, IL - After seeing yet another
shot of sunrise on Lake Michigan (most likely the same
one from the last episode), we see that Team Cake pretty
much wakes up at the crack of dawn as promised (Charles
said he'd be going home otherwise). They get a car from
another friend of Charles' and head up to Lake Forest to
get to the Bears' training camp before Team Ex arrives.
Fortunately, they are well ahead of their rivals (and
Charles can cancel his flight plans).
7:43am, Milwaukee, WI - Confident they have plenty of
time, Team Ex sleeps in a little longer (allowing the
beer to get through their system). After some breakfast,
another of Greg's multiple friends in the area allows
him use of his car for the day. So they drive back down
to Lake Forest to try the last task again. At this
point, I'm thoroughly convinced that there's only ONE
road between Milwaukee and Chicago and it's that damned
toll road that Team Cake had problems with in the last
episode. That's because Team Ex is also on this
road...and must likewise B.S. the toll collectors to let
them pass since they have no cash. Fortunately, they get
through without any hitches.
Back at Lake Forest, Charles is happy to be in the
Walter Payton Center, since "Sweetness" was one of his
idols. Chandler is a little surprised to see four
totally different people show up, but a deal's a deal,
so he lets the team practice first. It's at this point,
around 10am or so, that Team Ex arrives...and Doug's
Tourettes Syndrome returns when they find out it's
"first come first serve". But most of the pressure is on
Stacey, since her failure yesterday caused this to
So Team Cake practices with Charles tossing and the
girls catching...or TRYING to catch. Their success rate
is less than admirable. Even Chandler has his doubts.
Annemarie is having the worst time of them all. After a
while, they decide to give it a shot. It is decided that
Charles should go, followed by Kristin and Annemarie.
Charles catches his first pass without a problem.
Chandler then says he'll go to a softer throw for the
girls. Kristin, with the helmet pretty much over her
eyes, catches the very first pass...and there was much
rejoicing (Yea-yea). Then it's Annemarie's turn (she
didn't go last because they didn't want her to feel
insignificant). The first pass slips through her
fingers, but Chandler feels it's because the helmet's
way too loose. After getting some padding, she tries
again...and she CATCHES it! And there was MUCH rejoicing
(YEA-YEA!) They think they're getting the hell out of
Illinois...but they almost forgot about Kerri. No
worries, though, since Kerri is so very...successful!
Now CHARLES gets the Tourettes Syndrome, but in joy as
they tie the game up!
TEAM CAKE: 7, TEAM EXODUS: 7
And now, for the "worst waste of ESPN's money" moment.
Annemarie CALLS Team Ex on the Producer's Cell Phone to
let them know that task #16 is off limits. Team Ex is
RIGHT OUTSIDE THE BUILDING! Is it too much to WALK out
the door and tell them face-to-face?!?!? Cell phone
minutes cost MONEY, y'know!
10:49am - Anyway, Team Ex is upset that THEIR task was
pretty much taken away from them. Stacey feels the worst
of it, embarrassed that three girls did what she
couldn't. However, the team has a Plan B in case they
failed the task. So they head back to downtown Chicago
for an ice-related task:
#5: "Score a goal from center ice of an NHL rink; only
one chance each; no goalie (MUST wear skates)"
Now, it doesn't say it has to be the game rink, so they
make their way to the Blackhawks' training facility, the
Edge Ice Arena (geez, even PRACTICE rinks are being
commercialized!), confident they can pull this off. But,
uh,...let's just say that Tammy Kirkolis, the rink's
manager, must've went to the same school of diplomacy as
those at Wrigley Field. First she says there are people
already on the ice, then she wonders who will be
responsible if someone slips and falls. There's no open
ice until about 10:30pm, so the team decides to wait.
After watching some younger hockey players practice, the
word comes down that Kirkolis has finally relented
(though she tried her damnedest to discourage them) and
will allow them on the ice.
Stacey is the most concerned about this, still agonizing
over missing the pass yesterday. She's not all that
confident in her abilities anymore, wondering why she
has to be the only girl on a team of athletic guys. To
set her mind at ease, she's elected to go first. She
sets her skates, aims the stick and shoves the
puck...but it goes wide left of the open goal. She
tosses her stick down in anger at herself. Eric is next,
gets the puck dead center and slaps it. The team thinks
it's in but, in the words of Rick Eisen, it HITS DA
POST! Greg attempts next...and he's never played hockey
in his life. He lines up, winds up, he shoots...and he
SCORES! (*bullhorn goes off*) Greg, assisted by Eric and
Stacey, scores the go-ahead task for Team Exodus!
TEAM EXODUS: 8, TEAM CAKE: 7
12:22pm, Lake Forest, IL - While Team Ex gets the "puck"
out of Chicago, Team Cake needs a way to get out of the
state (guess the friend's car can't leave the state). So
a security guard gives them a ride to the train station
where they beg a visiting Brit to give them tickets to
Chicago. While they dine on free cheese samplers at a
nearby wine shop, they get the call from Team Ex about
task #5 being iced. They're bummed, but they feel they
can catch up once they get to St. Louis, their
After arriving in downtown Chi-Town, the team head for
Union Station and talk to the Amtrak dealer there. The
cost for four tickets to St. Louis? $119. No way the can
get ONE person to give that much scratch. So, while
Charles stays at the counter, the girls run around the
station begging for a few dollars here and there from
different people. Since the team can't touch any money,
those donating have to go to the counter and drop the
money off in front of Charles (who tries to talk the
counter girls into getting them free rides in a "chicken
car" or something like that). They have only an hour to
get all they need...and they do it with plenty of time
to spare. The plan is simple: get to St. Louis, meet
with contacts to get lodging and transportation for Day
12 (there's a Subaru at a landmark in St. Louis waiting
for the first team to arrive there to take for 12
hours), do a task in St. Louis, drive I-70 to Kansas
City, do ANOTHER task...and get to 9 tasks done
HOPEFULLY before Team Ex does.
Kristin calls the train ride the best part of the trip.
They are fed, they have bathrooms, coffee, soda, no
stress, no need to beg for gas money...and the view
isn't too shabby either. Even the passengers were
friendly. One "frat boy", as Kerri calls him, offers his
cell phone for Kerri to call her uncle and set up
lodging for the team. All in all, it's a very relaxing
couple of hours.
4:20pm, en route to Milwaukee, WI - Once again, Team Ex
is on that same toll road, happy to have got the lead
back. Their goal now is to get back to Milwaukee and do
ANOTHER task. However, the same trick doesn't work to
get them through the toll booth. The operator just can't
believe that four people (five if you count the
cameraman) are in a car without a penny to their name.
He lets them go...but warns them that if they don't get
off at the next exit and stop at the State Troopers
office, they WILL be ticketed. But time is of the
essence to the team, so they defy the order and drive
straight to Milwaukee. Their destination: the Milwaukee
Bucks training facility. Their goal:
#11: "Make 8 out of 10 free throws on a NBA court; one
attempt each per player (NBA player MUST be there to act
They talk to Dan Smychek, Associate PR Director for the
Bucks. Greg explains the task...and Smychek says they're
in luck, since rookie Dan Gadzuric is downstairs on the
practice court. They head down there, explain the task
to Gadzuric, and get ready to try to get to 9. They get
five practice shots each...but none of them do very well
with them. Finally, it's time to put up or shut up.
Stacey is, once again, elected to go first. After not
catching a pass and not scoring a hockey goal, Stacey
was VERY unconfident with her basketball skills. But she
makes her first shot. The next two, however, are
bricks...meaning Stacey needs to be perfect for the last
seven shots. Calmly, she gets the next one in...and the
next...and the next. The confidence builds in her. Soon,
she's 7 for 9, meaning the last shot would decide it.
She shoots...SHE SCORES! She admits that her mother
taught her most of what she knows about basketball.
TEAM EXODUS: 9, TEAM CAKE: 7
Next stop is Greg's parents' house. They've had no
contact with Greg for the past 10 days, so it was a bit
of a shock for them to hear from him and ask them for a
favor. Still, Russ and Barbara Matzek welcome the team
in as if they were extended family. The favor Greg wants
isn't for Run of the House, though. It's for the use of
Russ' car to drive across Wisconsin and towards
Minneapolis. It takes most of the remains of the day to
make it to Milwaukee, but they arrive at the residence
of yet ANOTHER friend of Greg's from college, a man
called "House". Well, House has houseguests for the
night, though they have to leave early in the morning.
9:20pm, St. Louis, MO - Meanwhile, as Team Ex drives to
the Twin Cities, Team Cake arrives in St. Louis. They
NEED to get to Chesterfield, about 40 miles away.
Another "frat boy" named Jeff offers them a ride to
Chesterfield. They arrive at the home of Kerri's Uncle
Larry, her mother's brother. Charles is impressed at how
"down home" Larry is...and how much MORE "down home"
Kerri becomes since arriving there. In fact, Kerri is so
very...artistic, showing everyone how she plays piano.
This is a softer side of the hyper Kerri...and Annemarie
and Kristin, who initially didn't want her on their
team, are happy to see this side of her. As the team
readies to sleep, Charles insists that he WILL swim the
four-minute Individual Medley before getting to Mt.
Day 11 ends with Team Ex in a two-task lead. Day 12,
9:23am, Minneapolis, MN - Guess they didn't have to
leave THAT early...either that or they overslept. Either
way, Team Exodus rises and shines, raring to go. The
plan is simple. They have just one task to go before
they can head to the finish line at Mt. Rushmore. So
they need to 1) complete a task and 2) get
transportation to South Dakota, about 10 hours' drive
away. Fortunately, there is SOMETHING they can do in
Minneapolis that can cover BOTH. It's something they
COULDN'T do in Miami eleven days prior:
#12: "Subaru Reward: Make a lay-up, a free-throw and a
3-pointer in 20 seconds on an NBA court (Current NBA
player must be there to act as timekeeper)"
First things first, though. House's girlfriend Joleene
gives them a ride to the Target Center in downtown
Minneapolis to make this happen with the Timberwolves.
Doug explains that if they complete this task, they're
pretty much guaranteed a victory. They get their 10th
task done, they get the Baja for 12 hours, they drive
for 10, they get to the finish line, they win the game!
So into downtown and past the Metrodome they go. They
arrive at the Target Center, home of the NBA's
Timberwolves and the WNBA's Lynx. They talk to Kent Wipf,
Director of Communications for the T-Wolves and explain
to them how #12 equals 10 for those 4. Wipf isn't sure.
Much like the Pacers, the Wolves had recently been
bounced from the NBA Playoffs, so the chances of them
being in the mood to play timekeeper were fairly slim.
Still, Wipf says he'll see what can be done...so, once
again, Team Ex waits. A little past noon, he says he
found somebody to help them and leads them to the floor
of the building.
The floor is set up in
Minnesota Lynx colors and logos. The team meet T-Wolves'
Center Loren Woods. Woods is glad to help. Uh,...one
problem, though: the task specifically says it has to be
an NBA court, not a WNBA court (the 3-point arc is
closer on a WNBA court, in case you were wondering).
Since the Target Center had the WNBA court down, they
suggest to Woods to head for their practice facility
with an NBA 3-point line to do the task. As they walk
over there, they talk about how tall Woods is (7'1",
just like Yao Ming and Wilt Chamberlain).
So they make it to the
practice court (all decked in Wolves logos and colors)
and get ready to do the task that will conceivably win
them the game and all those championship sports tickets.
They warm up their 3-point shots are were doing great,
including Doug (much to Stacey's surprise). Even Stacey
heaves a "trey". First one up for the task is Doug...but
he misses his first...LAY-UP! He gets it in, then bricks
his first free throw. He nails the second, but he only
has three seconds to get the 3-pointer. He shoots...and
bricks. Stacey is next, and all have confidence in her,
including herself. She aces the lay-up, but three tries
at the free-throw line were unsuccessful. Next is Eric.
Lay-up is good...but HE bricks three free throws as
well. Greg is their last hope. Lay-up...good. First free
throw...good. 15 seconds to make a "trey". First
attempt...no good. He chases down the ball and tries it
from the side of the arc. He shoots...and everything is
moving like slow motion...oh, wait, it is...it's called
editing. The ball sails towards the hoop...and BANGS off
the rim! *BZZZZZZ!* Time's up...task is failed...no road
trips to South Dakota tonight.
Although bummed that they couldn't pull it off, the team
remains optimistic. After all, they're up by two tasks
and, though they don't know it yet, they are FAR closer
to Mt. Rushmore than Team Cake. The only thing is that
they can't try the task again today and, even worse,
they don't have transportation. Not only are they short
of the goal, but they're stranded in Minneapolis.
Will Team Exodus get their last task done before Team
Cake can catch up? Will Team Cake be ABLE to catch up in
distance even if they catch up in tasks? Will next week
bring a close to reality shows on ESPN? Stay tuned!
August 19, 2003
Previously on BBD2, Team Cake snuck in and each caught a
35-yard pass from Chris Chandler...the task Team Exodus
had set up for that day. But Team Ex got even the best
way possible: by shooting a hockey goal from the center
line and by Stacey shooting 8 out of 10 free throws to
give the team a two-task lead. They were a three-point
shot in Minneapolis from having the game all wrapped
up...but they couldn't convert. While they're stranded,
Team Cake, having crashed in Kerri's uncle's house
outside St. Louis , is about to get moving on their OWN
Day 12, 7:43am, St. Louis, MO - As Team Exodus snoozes
before their eventual loss in Minneapolis, Team Cake
rises and shines at "Uncle Larry"'s place. They use the
last of their 12-hour Run of the House by calling up
everyone and their mother's auntie's cousin to try and
set up a task for them. They know they're now down 9-7,
but they're confident that they can pull off the "I-70
task double-header" as planned. Unfortunately, nobody
they call is very cooperative...EXCEPT for the St. Louis
Rams. What the team has in mind is a task Team Ex
couldn't pull off in Cincinnati :
#45: "McDonald's Reward: Dump Gatorade(TM) on a past or
present NFL coach"
With a tentative appointment set up for them, the next
order of business is transportation. They have no ride
and it's raining. But they know where a ride is waiting
for them. A Subaru Baja is waiting to be used for 12
hours by the first team to get to the Gateway Arch, the
large steel monument that signifies St. Louis as the
"Gateway to the West". So, after begging a taxi ride by
a lady in a nearby church, Team Cake makes it to the
Subaru, toss their bags in and haul over to the Rams'
practice facility. They have no idea if their
appointment will even happen; they just show up and hope
for the best.
Fortunately, Head of Rams' Media Relations Duane Lewis
says he can help. They actually have TWO choices as to
whom to dump Gatorade(TM) on: current head coach Mike
Martz and offensive line coach Jim Hanifan...who just so
happened to had been the head coach for the St.
Louis-then-Phoenix-now-Arizona Cardinals. It's Hanifan
that shows up first. Upon hearing the task, he says
that, since the team "seem like really fun kids", he'll
do it. Lewis is a bit shocked at that.
So out the five of them go with a large cooler-bucket of
Gatorade(TM) to an outdoor practice field. Hanifan says
he's still not sure WHY he's doing this...but he's ready
to do it. The team heft up the bucket and the coach is
doused from shoulder to shin in orange liquid. Kerri is
so very...excited and jumping for joy...but Hanifan just
wants out of his wet clothes and into a cold shower.
Kristin even feels sorry they did it...but the fact is
they did it!
TEAM CAKE: 8, TEAM EXODUS: 9
The team calls Team Ex to inform them that #45 is doused
and that the lead is down to one. After a quick meal at
McD's, they hop on I-70 and head for Kansas City . This
is a little trickier, since the K.C. Royals technically
play their games in Missouri and, due to the "one state,
one task" rule, they need to convince a Royal to drive
with them into Kansas to complete their ninth task. At
least, that's the plan, anyway.
12:22pm, Minneapolis, MN - After blowing their own task,
Team Ex did NOT want to hear that Team Cake is slowly
creeping up on them. Doug knows how bummed Greg must
feel having missed that last 3-pointer (Doug missed a
field goal before), but says they can't let this bring
them down. Everyone agrees they need to find a task to
do in the Twin Cities, even if it DOESN'T give them a
Subaru. One of the more unusual tasks catches their eye:
#40: "McDonald's Reward: Play any Governor in a game of
Twister(TM) in his/her office and win" (Ask me what
Twister(TM) has to do with sports...I dunno...)
There are a lot of problems with this task. For one,
they don't even have a game. For two, it's not exactly
that easy to set up. Stacey, despite not liking the
idea, thinks it's the best option they have left. Greg,
however, tries to convince the rest of the team to,
instead, try something with the Minnesota Twins. Stacey
thinks the best they can do is go to the Governor's
office and set up a time to do a task in case the Twins
thing falls through. So they beg a ride from Wayne
McFarland, a musician, to St. Paul and, after hogging to
the ESPN cameras, agrees. He even makes a sort of "Beg,
Borrow & Deal" reggae song off the top of his head which
everyone applauds...except Greg who hides his face.
They get to the government building (asking McFarland to
wait for them) and head to the office of the Honorable
Tim Pawlenty, Governor of Minnesota ever since Jesse
Ventura left office last year. His press secretary,
Leslie Kupchella, isn't sure he CAN play since he has
bad knees. Best he can do is be the "spinner" (y'know,
spin the dial and say "Right foot on red" or whatever),
but the task says the Governor must play. The team
continued to push for this to happen (I'm sure Kerri
would be proud of them), but Kupchella keeps saying that
he most likely can't.
2:40pm - Finally, after a long wait and a lot of talking
among the PR guys, Kupchella comes out and green-lights
the game...but there's still ONE little problem: they
don't have a game with them. They decide they can MAKE
one if they have to. So, with the help of a security
guard who is an "expert" at the game, they put together
a makeshift Twister(TM) board out of 24 sheets of paper
colored in each of the four colors. The Governor's Aide
is close-by, talking to second-grade students on a field
trip, and the team explains what they're doing (though
not that it's part of the show). Eric is stunned; he's
certain that no one would EVER agree to do this...but
here they were, ready to play and, hopefully, wrap
In comes His Honor, shaking hands (like politicians do
on reflex, I'm sure) and gets explained again what was
explained to him earlier by his PR firm. Sure enough,
he's willing to help them. The rule of the task is that
one team member is the "spinner" while the others play
the Governor. If the Governor falls before all three of
the others do, the task is complete.
To spare the readers of the monotony that I'm sure some
of them found in my World Poker Tour Championship recap,
I won't go into a spin-by-spin account. Suffice it to
say that the first time a hand was "spun", the Governor
planted it...and instantly slipped. Just like that, the
game was over, the team had won...and they were just a
drive to Mt. Rushmore away from victory!
TEAM EXODUS: 10! TEAM CAKE: 8
OK...so Team Ex doesn't have to do any more tasks. But
one final problem remains: how the heck to get to South
Dakota ? The final task got them dinner at McDonald's,
but not the Subaru they really needed. So now comes the
hardest begging task of all: getting someone to drive
them to the foot of Mt. Rushmore so they can earn their
championship tickets. McFarland is out of the question.
They head to a nearby bar and ask the employees for a
ride, even if it's just part of the way. They didn't
bite, but they DID offer some appetizers to bide them
over until they find a McDonald's (assuming they
remember that they got the reward).
4:20pm , en route to
Kansas City , MO - Team Cake is heading towards what
they hope is their ninth task. The plan is to talk a
Royals' pitcher to cross the state line into Kansas and
then help them with...
#32: "Dressed in full catcher's gear, warm up an MLB
All-Star or Cy Young-winning pitcher; catch a pitch of
at least 85 MPH" (The Cy Young award is the award for
the best pitcher of the year in each league, awarded
after the World Series)
If they can't find such a pitcher, they need to find a
baseball field in Kansas and try something they couldn't
do in Cleveland :
#4: "McDonald's Reward: Get a bat from a Major League
Baseball All-Star and get a hit during batting practice
(max 10 swings)"
Either way, it's going to be very tricky, since they've
had zero contact with the Royals beforehand. Kristin
doesn't sound very optimistic, saying that they are in
the wrong part of the country right now. But,
wait...it gets worse. As they drive away, they hear a
tornado watch on the radio. That turns into a
warning...then into a touching down. The team has to
stop and pull over until the tornado dissipates. They
decide that, since they can't get through this foul
weather, the best thing to do is to stop at a truck stop
in Sweet Springs (about 60 miles from K.C.) and wait out
the storm. They might lose the use of the Subaru, but at
least they'll be safe.
4:40pm, Minneapolis, MN - While Team Cake prevent
themselves from taking a one-way trip to Oz (and I don't
mean Australia), Team Exodus is still in sunny Minnesota
wondering how they were going to travel the 600 miles to
Rapid City, SD and the finish line of this cross-country
game. They decide that getting to Sioux Falls , SD would
be fine for the night and they can get the rest of the
way on Day 13. Greg calls his Uncle Bob to see if he can
take him on the 6-hour trip. Sure enough, Uncle Bob
meets them in front of the Target Center and, after a
little brown-nosing by Greg, gets them the ride they
need. The ride is "flawless", as Greg says, and they
arrive just as the rains come. They do NOT wish to sleep
outside tonight, so the team goes to a nearby Days Inn
and Stacey is let loose on Corey Hart, the motel's night
manager (and, no, NOT the same one who sang "Sunglasses
At Night" and "Never Surrender"). Hart falls to Stacey's
charms (and the team's pitiful looks) and puts the team
and Uncle Bob up for the night, free of charge.
9:42pm , Sweet Springs , MO - At a nearby motel, Team
Cake gets word that the tornadoes might just tear
through the city. The local sheriff takes the team to a
safe house in a church. There, although they have no way
out, they have a great time with Kerri playing music and
Charles singing to the crowd. They may lose the game,
but they're having fun.
Day 13, 8:20am, Sioux Falls, SD - With Team Cake forced
to wait out the storm while stuck at eight tasks done
and Team Ex a mere 350 miles away from victory, it's
pretty much all over but the driving. The team enjoys a
continental breakfast, including waffles and coffee.
Everyone is in a great mood as they leave. But there's
still the one daunting task of begging for a ride to Mt.
Rushmore . For once, none of the team members have any
contacts to call upon, so they truly have to beg for a
cross-state ride. One guy at a gas station says he's
heading back towards Minneapolis , which just wouldn't
do at all. And with the team looking rather unkempt, no
one wanted anything to do with them. Greg even tries to
talk to a huge metal buffalo outside a restaurant into
taking them to Rapid City . To be stopped dead in their
tracks so close to victory...it was hard for Team Ex to
9:23am, Sweet Springs , MO - Meanwhile, Team Cake
awakens to the devastation that the tornadoes have
produced. Small towns have been leveled. But they are
still alive. And what's more, since they haven't
anything from Team Ex, they are still in the hunt. Due
to the bad weather, they still had time left to use
their Subaru...so they hope they could get to K.C, and
get the task done before they became stranded.
They manage to get to Kaufmann Stadium in K.C. Now it's
a matter of convincing a pitcher to come with them into
Kansas and pitch balls at them in full catcher's
regalia. They manage to run into Mike Sweeney, the
Royals' star first baseman, and ask him for help.
Charles even shows off the Royals' tattoo he got way
back on Day 2 and this gets Sweeney to be even more
willing to help. He tells them that they can talk to the
pitchers during batting practice around 1pm and that
they can enter by talking to Aaron Babcock, Royals'
Director of Media Relations. And Babcock drops the anvil
on them. The Royals have NO current All-Star pitchers
and NO pitchers who have won the Cy Young. They have a
RETIRED pitcher who was in the All-Star Game long ago,
but it's not likely he'll accept. He goes to check on
But, wait! Isn't that Mike Hargrove, Manager for the
Baltimore Orioles, the Royals' opponent today, at the
front entrance? Hargrove asks what's going on and the
team pitches the pitcher task to him. Certainly the
ORIOLES have at least ONE All-Star pitcher or Cy Young
winner on their squad. Then they tell Hargrove that they
can't do it at the stadium and must go across the state
line to do this task...and that almost shuts the door.
Still, after a little explanation and a lot of pleading
on the girls' parts, Hargrove says to hang tight and
he'll see what can be done.
A short time later, out comes Babcock, saying he can
help. The pitcher he's drummed up is Jeff Montgomery,
the all-time saves leader for the Royals. Best of all,
he LIVES across the state line in Kansas . Therefore,
all they need is to borrow some catcher's equipment for
Charlie to wear and they'll be all set. Oh, wait...the
Subaru time is up. So Kerri and Annemarie go to find
them a ride to Montgomery 's house. They run into
Dustin, a Royals fan. When they explain that all he
needs to do is drive them about 20 minutes away, wait a
short while, then drive them back, Dustin agrees.
Charles is very confident now. He has the equipment,
they have the ride and they're VERY close to completing
task number nine for them...unaware that their foes are
close to the finish line.
They get to Montgomery 's house and the All-Star is
explained the task. Montgomery is happy to help them.
They put down a home plate, get a catcher's mitt from
him and warm him up. Kerri is given a speed gun to
measure the speed of Montgomery 's pitches and gets
behind the bushes behind Charles. If Charles can hold on
to a ball going 85 miles per hour or faster, the task is
over. But the first few pitches barely break 70MPH.
Slowly, he works his way into the 80s. Charles is
excellent, catching every pitch thrown. Finally, the
righty pitches...Charles catches...and Kerri reads "86"!
TEAM CAKE: 9, TEAM EXODUS: 10
Now the better news: Dustin decides to forgo the Royals
game and take them all the way to Mt. Rushmore if he can
(the 1-1-12 rule is still in effect so Dustin can only
drive them for 12 total hours). Dustin doesn't
mind...when else is he going to have the chance to
escort three "hot chicks" around? But the team STILL has
one more task to do before they get there. The only
states between them are Nebraska and Iowa , so finding
something to do MIGHT prove difficult.
2:15pm, Sioux Falls, SD - All morning Team Ex has tried
to get a ride to Mt. Rushmore...and all morning they've
been rejected. Greg says that, since this isn't "big
city land", they need to be more passive and easy-going
in their attempts to get a ride. Oh, yeah, and Team Cake
just called to say they've finished #32 and are now one
task and 700 miles from taking the game out of their
hands like they took the 35-yard-pass task out of their
hands two days ago. They need a ride...and they need it
So they head back to Cody' Tavern (the restaurant with
the buffalo outside)...and they run into Jenny, a
waitress there. She says, "My brother is SERIOUSLY
thinking about taking you all the way." They go inside
to take to said brother, Dennis. They put on "serious
desperate" faces. And Dennis agrees. So they pile into
Dennis' truck and head off on I-90. Greg isn't jumping
for joy just yet. They don't know where Team Cake is
and, for all they know, they could be getting their
tenth and final task done as they were yakking with
Jenny and Dennis. Until they crossed the finish line
before Team Cake, the team is still hoping to make it.
Meanwhile, although Dustin is a God-send to Team
Cake...his truck isn't. It only gets about 12 miles to
the gallon and Dustin, like the team, has no money on
him for gas. So they have to beg the people for money
for gas and snacks. Once again, since the team can't
touch money, Dustin has to gather the money. A minor
league baseball team comes by and, seeing the three
girls, immediately come to their aid. They give them
more than enough to get back on the road. Charles did
nothing the whole time except watch "his girls" work.
They better think about what they can do; they have 290
miles between them and Mt. Rushmore at this point.
And DOWN the stretch they come! Team Ex is STILL
unsettled by where Team Cake may be. They even look out
the windows all the time to make sure that the guys in
the truck beside them arent the opposing team. Doug's
main concern is what time the park closes, but Dennis
gets them there with plenty of daylight to spare. They
start getting excited, having traveled (as Doug
estimated) 2,178 miles without a penny to their name.
They finally arrive at the monument. They take their
time walking up...though Stacey REALLY wants to run,
just in case Charles, Kristin, Kerri and Annemarie come
sprinting from behind them. As they make their way to
the final reward, they each reflect on what they've
To Doug, dealing with unknown was the hardest part. They
needed to be flexible and just get tasks done wherever
Eric learned lessons on the trip, especially when Team
Cake booted him out.
Stacey greatly remembers the jet ride to Sacramento and,
even more, getting a task done all by herself.
And Greg summed it up: "The sense of accomplishment is
completely rewarding, completely humbling...and just
Meanwhile, somewhere in South Dakota , Team Cake is
given the bad news. Kristin finds it hard to say
good-bye to three people she's been with every waking
and sleeping moment for two weeks. Annemarie feels proud
to have survived this trip. Kerri is so very...happy for
the friendships she's made throughout the trip. And
Charles says the game proved who your friends are (and
it's safe to say that Charles had the BULK of them).
All right, enough of this mush! Team Exodus - Doug,
Greg, Stacey & Eric - make it to the foot of Mt.
Rushmore . They dove off a 10-meter platform in FL, had
dinner with the Maloofs in CA, made a 3-pointer in GA,
anchored a sportscast in AL, took a picture with the
Heisman in TN, boxed a woman in KY, took a photo with a
winning horse in OH, won the Meet & Compete in Chicago,
shot a half-ice goal in IL, hit 8 out of 10 free throws
in WI and beat a sitting Governor in a game of
Twister(TM) in MN. They did it all in 13 days since
being deposited in South Beach, Miami, FL and have
traveled the over 2,000 miles to the foot of the Black
Hills...all to win two tickets to any four sports
championships they want.
Summer Sanders is there to greet them...and to
officially declare them the winners of Beg, Borrow &
And, with that...the series ends...not with a bang but a
very tiny whimper.
Will either team ever forget this race? Will ESPN ever
make a third edition? Will "Playmakers" do with dramatic
series what failed with game shows and reality series:
hold an audience for ESPN outside of "SportsCenter"?
Don't bother staying tuned, 'cause I'm OUTTA here!