May 29, 2003 -
Just a quick recap of the rules - the audience votes on
who wins - it's the new new new Gong Show. We start off
with 4 cloggers called All That - and it's Riverdance
all over again. They make the 30 seconds - and the
roaches would not stand a chance. Bobby Yang is an
electric violinist - and he's next. He's very very nice
- and he has no problem getting through the 30 seconds
with his 'Sweet Home Alabama' rendition. Charlene
Anderson is a singer - and she belts her way through
'You better Love me'.
Now for the first loser of the evening - Adam Jay is on
his head playing 2 flutes through his nose. That doesn't
sit well with the audience and he is headed out of the
competition. Gary Midnight has a few magic tricks - and
he flies through the 30 seconds. Ricardo Sosa does some
ring gymnastics and some contortionism and he passes.
Phil Snyder does Simpson imitations - and he gets
through the 30 seconds as well.
Tony WIlson dances sings 'Get On Up' - and he gets
through it. Charles DelValle does a goofy Wild Thing
version with the Addams family thing on his head. He
becomes the second audience casualty.
Sarah Shacherle does some dancing and she makes it
through. T-Mac and Company do some bad rapping and they
get knocked out.
That was only the first segment. Here is segment #2 -
Victor and Lily do some nice balance performing. Ray
Maestes does some dancing, and while it's not Star
Search quality, it's good enough. Mike Bliss juggles
while on a unicycle 0 but he drops his juggle stuff and
he gets dropped out.
Marc Hunt does some nice bike tricks. Bill Davidson
tries to Hackysack his way in - but he gets kicked to
the curb. Danny Denchin does the can can with a pencil
to his mouth, and he is the second straight loser. John
Bowden tries to pick the crowd up with dual electric
guitar playing, and that seems to do the trick. Orlando
Moore and Johnny star is a ventriloquist act - and that
gets through. Will Michael Potts' breakdancing and robot
moves get him in? No. Lisa Cobb is an upside down human
puppet - and she makes it. So do the 'Swinging Sisters'
an accapella group.
But all of the acts are done - and we are down to the
three favorites. Finalist #1 is Tony WIlson, who sings
again and does some more dancing. Finalist #2 is All
That - and they do some more clogging. The last finalist
is Ray Maestes, and the Star Search wanna be breakdances
up a storm.
So three finalists, three dancers. Maybe Star Search
does have something going on. Maybe we should be seeing
a revvial of Dance Fever next. The dancing fool who wins
the $25,000 is Ray Maestes!! I guess breakdancing is
back in vogue. Over $325,000 worth so far given out to
dancing champions. We'll see if that trend continues
June 5, 2003 -
So, who is going to be the lucky loser this week? Let's
find out, shall we?!
The show kicks off with Shooting Stars, a group of
phys-ed coaches performing Gymnastic moves and they
wowed the crowd enough to make it.
Next up, is a Tina Turner impressionist, Connie
Marshall, who sings Proud Mary. 'Rolling, Rolling on a
river'; As she rolls right along through her 30 seconds
Next up is a huge belly dancer named Seleka and
amazingly with all her rolls of skin she made it
through. My eyes are scared!!
Next is Kenny Marquez, a service Manager, who performs
his version of rock & roll and quickly gets eliminated
with his horrendous electrical guitar.
Next up is Matt Wilhelm, student, who is also a BMX
Trickster and he shows us some of his moves on the bike
and wows the crowd enough for some cheers.
Tony Vera, Fire-Chair Balancer, is up next and he
performs some magic with Fire and holds up a girl in a
chair with his mouth. That performance gets him to move
Edward Jackson came up next and performs some tap
dancing with fire on his toes, at first it seemed ok but
I don't see how he made it.
King Kukulele is up next singing and performing on a
small guitar (Ukulele) and quickly gets booed as he was
making absolutely no sense.
Peter Davison is up and he juggles two sticks and a ball
as he uses the drums back and forth. He moves on, as the
crowd seemed to like it.
Steven Kellogg, illusionist, was wearing a cooking hat
and apron with a fake mustache, need I say more? He got
Next up is a Group called Big Cats as they performed
some hip hop with some dancing. The crowd liked them and
they were ok to me.
Next up is duo named Handsome Little Devils as they
perform some juggling with fire on pogo sticks! This was
kind of cool to watch and I wanted to see one of them
catch fire but maybe next time as they moved along.
Next is Christiane Callil, a Samba Dancer. She dances in
a cool looking outfit and makes it to through.
Next is Lance Laska, a magician. He tries to impress the
crowd with some floating of a cigar with no hands then
makes it explode. This didn't look cool at first but he
Joe Monti is up and he's a Comedian who tries to dance
his way through with some funny body movements in a
oversized coat as he moves on.
Next is the Garza Brothers who perform some Hand presses
and I give them a lot of credit as it takes some
strength for 3 grandfathers to hold each other up like a
I on top of a C, it was pretty cool.
Next is Daniel Volk, a paddle-Baller and it doesn't take
him long to get booed off.
Next is Greg Varlotta, a musican who was awful enough to
Next is New York Street Boys as they drum and Dance
around in construction helmets which they also used as
drums, funny enough they make it through.
Next is Atomic Girl, a bubble blower, who sure enough
blows bubble through her body suit - she got booed
faster than the bubbles can pop.
Next is House Jacks who sing 'Signed, Sealed, Delivered'
and do a pretty good job as they make it.
As the crowd made their votes to who moved on, Finalist
#1, New York Street Boys comes on and performs some more
drumming and dancing as fire explodes out of their
drums, pretty cool.
Finalist #2, Handsome Little Devils who perform again on
Pogo sticks with fire juggling and move it a lot faster
to whoa the crowd.
Finalist #3, Matt Wilhelm, BMX trickster who does some
more awesome moves on his BMX bike and he also wows the
crowd with some bike spins and rotations.
So, now you have a trickster, a fire juggler and three
guys drumming with fire sticks. Do you smell smoke? I
think it's from the bike tires spinning around as Matt
Wilhelm, BMX trickster pulls it out for $25,000. As the
show ends he performs some more bike moves and even
shows off some more awesome tricks while standing on his
bike. Let's see next week if we have some more tricks or
some fire? We shall see, until then - CYA!!!
June 12, 2003 -
Three of these acts are
going to get a minute's worth of screen time. But for
only one, it'll pay off big time. On with the show!
First out the gate is Darryl Cleveland, a fire
balancer/juggler. Note to future 30-seconders, fire is
always a sure key for the full ride. He makes it. Next
is rapper Random Axis. His rhymes are mesmerizing, as
lyrical fire lasts the full 30. Ivan Velez comes from
Puerto Rico. He breakdances and topspins his way past
We go from one thing spinning to three, as Chad Lowe
showcases his talent, spinning luggage and a microwave.
For a little more flair, he juggles the luggage. He
lasts the full ride.
The first casualty of the night is Elizabeth Cosens, who
is literally barking up the wrong tree. Audience enacts
the eliminator to send the dog impersonator running with
her tail between her legs.
It's up to James Brewster Thompson and his three
ladyfriends to jump-rope their way back to the
audience's good graces. I could never jump rope with
three women on me. One, maybe, but not three. He lasts
SFX specialist Lou Klein is the "Funky Funker". He
looked good dancing. But then he turned around, and all
of a sudden, the Funky Funker is just funky. And not in
the good way, as he's eliminated.
Drop Zone are steppers from the Bronx. Bronx represented
fully, as they stomp their way past the thirty.
Say aloha to Kaneaku, a pair of Tahitian ukulele
performers. Now say aloha again. Rule 1: If you don't
know what the hell your partner's doing, don't go off on
a tangent. The audience goes off, and tells Kaneaku to
go jump in a volcano.
New-woppers ('cause it's latter-day doo-wop and... yeah)
the Alley Cats send up a smooth rendition of "Get
Ready". Their tight harmonies--and their bowling
shirts--get them through the half-minute.
Fire and Ice, eight country/western dances, line dance
and boot scoot their way through the full 30. Getting
hot enough for ya?
Duo Design are two balancers from Las Vegas. They have
no problem balancing on each other's head. And they have
no problem lasting the full 30.
Continuing on the theme of two is double neck guitar
player Dominic Gaudios. Kinda sounds like something
you'd hear off of "Trigun", but it gets him through the
Dario Alberico is a cab driver from Miami doing... well,
I don't know what he's doing, but he'd better stop. The
audience wisely stops him before he breaks his neck
spinning... whatever that is. It doesn't get any better.
Meet teeth musician Anthony Denucce, who offers up a
rendition of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game". And it's
one, two, three strikes, he's out (and ironically,
that's exactly what part of the song he was on!)
James Bizarro Robinson offers up prestidigitation (an
SAT word for magic), lighting himself on fire, and
lighting... himself... on fire. You can sense a theme
there, can't you? He lasts the full ride.
Dalton and Luisse are rolla-bolla balancers. One misstep
and it's Boo-ville for these guys, but they, and their
rolla-bolla-balls, last the entire time.
Human beatbox Chris Marquand has some bass up in his
system, as he gets his sub-woofer through the 30.
Korean drum dancer Hea-Jin Yoon makes her drums dance
and bends over backwards to get the audience's approval.
And she does.
Physical illusionist Jason McPherson gets himself
trapped in a box. He better get out, because he has to
take his bow for lasting the full 30.
Finally, there's Duane Kidd, a back-flipping
free-thrower. First one, missed. Second one, airball.
Third, choking. Fourth one finally goes in. Can he make
another one before his 30 seconds are up? Nope.
One-for-five, just like Shaq.
After all that, it's time to vote. Who lit up the stage
and who just burned? Finalist #1 is Ivan Velez. He does
some flipping this time, topped off with more spinning.
If you've ever seen "Beat Street", this guy is pretty
Finalist #2: Dominic Gaudios with more doubleneck
stylings. Very impressive use of both necks at the same
time. For a guy who's lazy, he just might take the
money. But not if the other two finalists having
anything to say about it.
Finalist #3: Alley Cats. Alley, Bowling shirts. Oh, I
get it now. They sing "Rama-Lama-Ding-Dong" for their
closing number. Once again, tight harmonies. And you
have to dig the bass-man on that last tail.
So will it be a dancer, a guitarist, or an a cappella
group? The 25 G's and playout rights go to... Ivan
Velez! What better way to celebrate? Flipping and
top-spinning. Who'll have to get dizzy next week for
$25,000 and a little bit of fame? Tune in next week. Me,
I'm going to sing doo-wop and spin on my head. Later,
June 19, 2003 -
"30 Seconds To Fame" is always fun to watch and for
$25,000 who wouldn't watch? Anyway, enough babbling -
let's get started.
First up, The Metchkarovs, who perform gymnastic moves
off of a bar, including some cool looking flips.
Next up, Bob Foehilinger, who juggles fire sticks and
pretty fast I must say as he moves along.
Next is Buddy Lee, who does some ridiculous jump roping
and some body off the ground jump roping as he woo'ed
Next is Gregory Popovich, a ladder juggler, and he
performed what else juggling off of one sided ladder as
he also moves along.
Nicole Starling is up next singing "It's Raining Men",
and amazingly as much as I hate that song she made it
So 5 in a row make it, but I want to boo someone off
Next up is Diane & Primo Desiderio as they try to
perform skateboard moves and they quickly get booed as
they should because they SUCKED.
Next is Little Spinners, a plate spinning midget trio,
who performed plate spinning - LOL Enough said as they
Next is Jared Grimes as he tapped danced his way through
some cool moves.
Next is Steven Hughes and he was dressed in some
ridiculous outfit and tried to impress the crowd with
dancing and he had some wicked haircut as he got booed
Next is the Imperial Knights, two guys who performed
medieval sword fighting. It looked like they wouldn't
make it at first but after some cool hits and swings
they made it to woo the crowd.
Next is Kevin Shelley who is a fitness instructor who
smashes about 30 boards on his head one by one, enough
for the crowd to boo him off but he edges the 30 second
clock just in time.
Next is Christopher with puppets all dressed up like the
Village people and he performed YMCA and he woo'ed the
crowd with a famous song.
Next is Kyle Brender as he performed some glow sticks
twirling and he twirled pretty fast as he received mix
reactions to survive.
Next up is a twisted dance troupe and they danced with
some hand fans and they enough cool moves to make it.
Next is Bill Sparacino
as he tried to impress the crowd with boring magic as he
got booed off.
Next is The Akishins as they performed some cool jump
rope with 3 people standing on each other as two people
standing on each other on each end swung the rope, got
to admit its original.
Next is Eddy Asher, a Yodeling Musician, who did some,
what else, Yodeling with a guitar. He made it through as
the crowd loved it.
Next is Toxic Audio as they danced, voice beat box, and
sang, 'Turn the Beat Around' as they seemed to be the
best so far.
Next is Nick Pawlow, and he had his puppet dressed as a
cave man and said look watch me this is how you get
girls. After that he danced "What is Love" from a
popular skit from SNL. The crowd loved it and some guys
had to stand up to cheer it on. This was funny.
Next is Adam Ace, a comedian, who tried to impress the
crowd with his humor by sticking plungers all over his
body and danced himself down to boxers with smiley faces
as he made it to elimination with 2 seconds left.
Next is Manjos Family as they performed some cool
looking clothes changing of a lady in the middle and she
must have changed like 3 times as they some how made it.
Now, its time for the top 3 finalists; and so far its up
in the air. Let's see who made it:
1st finalist is Christopher with puppets as he performed
'In the Navy' by Village People.
2nd finalist is Buddy Lee as he performed once again,
body jump roping but this time Blindfolded and even some
butt jump roping.
The 3rd finalists are the Manjos Family as they
performed some more Clothes changing magic and how lame
is it that they made it through here.
So now that we have the final 3, who will win? So far I
think it should be Body jump roper but what do I know?
The winner of $25000 goes to:
Christopher with Puppets as he closed the show with
Village People's 'YMCA'
Well there you have it, a man made puppets and danced
like a fool and he's $25,000 richer, where do I sign?
LOL Anyway, let's see who wins next week on 30 Seconds
to FAME!!! CYA!
June 26, 2003 -
We are back on the rotating schedule - and it's my turn
to watch the wacky kids. What will the ruffians do this
time around? We'll be finding out right...about...
Now - starting with Claudia Elizabeth - who's a foot
archer (you have got to be kidding me). Sure enough, she
shoots arrows with her feet and gets in easily. Kristin
Rudness is next as she hula hoops with fire - that good
enough for her to get in a hot performance. Tap sounds
underground are over with the audience, and they pass
Red Panda is a bowl-flipping unicyclists. She flips 4
bowls and flips her way in. Pasha Rianstev does some
sort of bizarre dual doll dancing thingie and Panza is
the first one to be eliminated. Morgan Short does his
best Bill Clinton sax impersonation and he gets invited
to the Oval Office. Banks Humphries plays with a big
plastic blow-up doll - but I've seen it too many times,
and so has the audience - his bubble bursts.
Jamie Gumm sings that she's heard it through the
grapevine - and the crowd wants to hear more. Medea
Sirkus does some synchronized dancing that the audience
seems to be in synch with. Richard Gonzi does some
upside down piano playing that seems to key the crowd
Second act, same as the first - The Step Club step on to
it and step into the next round. Charles King does an
Elvis Impersonation on stilts that gets him out of
heartbreak hotel. Jet Green does one of Chico's favorite
things - spinning - and he barely makes it out of being
eliminated. Jay Byers swallows some swords - and he
makes the cut. as do Indra and Solongo, 2 bendable
Jay Forth, who does clapping noises with his mouth, gets
the big hand-off out of the competition. Joseph Saba
makes special effects with his mouth - but the crowd
likes that. They also think that D5 is D-vine enough to
move on. Dario Vasquez does some acrobatice with a ball,
but it's not enough and he gets bounced out. We get more
dancing with G-Force, and none of the dancers get
We are done with the preliminaries - and the audience
picks out the 3 finalists. Finalist #1 is Indra and
Solongo, and they do some more body bending to please
the crowd. Finalist #2 is Claudia Elizabeth, who jumps
upside down and bounces a basketball for an encore.
Finalist #3 is Jamie Gumm, who sings 'Dancing in the
We have ladies night in this episode of 30 seconds, and
the winner of the 25G is Indra and Solongo!!!! They do
some more bending for us as we bend out.