Too Many Cooks in the
The Race went from Austria through
Liechtenstein and on to Switzerl...aw, do you even CARE about these
recaps anymore?!? WE GOT HIM!!! WE GOT OSAMA BIN LADEN!!!
How can I possibly compete with that?!? What does riding
motorized bikes across the length of Liechtenstein, chowing down on a
pot-load of cheese fondue and hauling luggage around a Swiss resort town
have compared to killing the most wanted man in the world?!?!?!?
*sigh* OK, OK...I'll try to rise above it. So Zev & Justin (Team Puzzle
Pieces) won for the fourth time and Jet & Cord (Team Cowboy Bebop)
couldn't "cowboy up" past a U-TURN and were sent packing. Five teams
remain to get back on fairly-safer American soil and win a million...who
will get metaphorically shot through the eye next?!?
PIT STOP #9
0654 LOCAL TIME
In the shadow of the Matterhorn in the
pre-dawn hours, Zev & Justin start of Leg 10 of the Race as such:
YOUR HEADED INTO
Make your way to the Air Rescue
Helicopter Port in Zelmatt. There you will sign up for chartered
copter flights to an UNKNOWN LOCATION which leave at five-minute
intervals (first come, first serve). Before boarding, you will
receive your next clue.
You have $1 for this Leg of the
"Oh, that's comforting,"
says Zev about the "unknown" part of the clue. They run off to the
Port...which is surprisingly close by. They find the flights start
around 9:15am, weather permitting...so they sign up for that flight and
await daybreak. The other teams' departure times (all local):
Kisha & Jen (Team Cardinal Sisters): 0702
Kent & Vyxsin (Team Dating Goths): 0800
Gary & Mallory (Team KY/Dad): 0818
"Flight Time" & "Big Easy" (aka Herb & Nate, Team Trotter): 0843
Gary & Mallory manage to get
a cab before Kent & Vyxsin and pass them en route.
It was snowing rather badly
before dawn but, come 0915 local time, things had cleared up and the
first copter has its rotors going. Before Zev & Justin enter, though,
they're given their next clue::
SEARCH or RESCUE?
SEARCH: You will travel to a
glacier and, using an avalanche beacon, find and dig up a training
dummy. Once the dummy is out of the snow, the trainer will hand you
your next clue.
RESCUE: You must rescue a live
person from an ice crevasse. One team member will rappel into the
crevasse and clip a line onto the stranded person. The other will
then use a pulley system to lift their partner out and then you both
will help the person out. Once he's out, the "victim" will hand you
your next clue.
Choose which task you want to do
BEFORE you enter the helicopter and tell the pilot which one you've
chosen. Once the task is completed, your copter will take you to
your next location.
After a little thought (and
a misconception that the Matterhorn was named for the Disneyland ride
and not the other way around), Team Puzzle Pieces decide that SEARCH
would be faster. They enjoy the ride out among the Alps. Five minutes
later, Team Cardnial Sisters choose RESCUE and take off. Five minutes
after THAT, Team KY/Dad chooses SEARCH and head out. Team Dating Goths
go with RESCUE and, twenty minutes behind the leaders, Team Trotters
decide the same.
Zev & Justin land on the
glacier and start to look for the training dummy. It's a LITTLE
difficult using the beacon finder but they get the hang of it quickly.
When they find the place where they believe the dummy is, they stop
moving and start digging. When Gary & Mallory arrive, they're quick to
find their beacon as well and THEY start digging. Kisha & Jen arrive at
the crevasse and, since Kisha's afraid of heights, Jen decides to rappel
and "save a soul". While down in the ice, Kent & Vyxsin (cold as can be)
arrive and, as Jen clips her victim, Kent gets lowered by Vyxsin to his.
And Team Trotters joined them soon enough with "Flight Time" Herb being
lowered. Vyxsin keeps lowering Kent...even after he screams to her to
STOP. But he still clips his victim and gets hauled up.
SEARCH: Down and down and
down the two teams dig, Zev even mistaking Justin's foot for the dummy's
foot. Gary thinks he sees a head...
RESCUE: Jen's heavier than
she looks, accroding to Kisha as she ratchets her back up. Right behind
her is Kent. And Herb clips his victim and gets lifted by Nate.
SEARCH: Both teams find
their dummies, but Team KY/Dad's is more out than Team Puzzle Pieces,
who tries to dig laterally. Gary yanks the dummy out...but his legs are
still in the ice. (They are TERIBLE rescuers, breaking off a man's legs
RESCUE: Together, Team
Cardinal Sisters crank up their victim and, once on frozen agua firma,
he gives the clue to them. Leaving the DETOUR in first, they open this
HEAD DOWN THE
The helicopter will take you to a
nearby ski resort. Once you land, find the train station to take you
back down to Zelmatt. Then head for Le Petit Cervin somewhere in
Zelmatt where you will find your next clue.
Had Jen known the clue was
with the victim, she would've just taken the clue and left him DOWN
there! As it is, the sisters head back to the copter and take off. Kent
seems to be doing all the work lifting the victim out, but they get him
out and leave the DETOUR in second. Herb is almost out of the crevasse
at this point.
As Zev & Justin run out of
steam in getting their dummy out, Gary tries to muscle the dummy's legs
out of the snow and ice...but Gary, the oldest Racer left, is fading in
the thin mountain air.
Team Trotters are out of the
ice ditch and work together to easily haul the victim out. He hands the
b-ballers a clue and they split in third, leaving the SEARCHers behind.
Team Puzzle Pieces argue
about Zev not pulling his weight despite the fact that Justin is hogging
the hole they're in. Meanwhile, Team KY/Dad are BOTH in their hole and,
with one mighty dual pull, yank the legs of the bisected dummy out of
the snow. Well, the "victim" may not be alive after getting its legs
pulled off...but that's not part of the task. Gary & Mallory grab both
parts and head back to the chopper. They get the clue from the trainer
and depart in fourth, meaning the four-Leg winners have just gone from
first to WORST.
Kisha & Jen arrive at the
ski resort...and Kent & Vyxsin are right behind them. Both teams arrive
at the station...only to learn that the next train to Zelmatt is at
11:08. There's still some time to make this an Equalizer. And here comes
Gary & Mallory to make it a three-way tie again (SEARCH must be closer
to the resort than RESCUE)...and Herb & Nate make it four-way.
So...where's Zev & Justin? Still digging...though not arguing too much
anymore. The train arrives and the four teams board.
Both best friends are almost
out of steam, their dummy still half buried and they are unable to
figure out what to do now. They dig laterally again...and, like the
previous team, come out with HALF the dummy (the LOWER half this time).
They laugh at first, but they move faster because they only have 25
minutes until the next train.
Speaking of which, the first
train to Zelmatt arrives and the eight American Racers file out, looking
LE PETIT CERVIN
Oh, there it is...it's a
hotel (and it's French for "the Small Matterhorn"). The Goths find it
first and find a...:
WHO'S WANTS TO MAKE
A NEW FRIEND?
With over 200 million metric tons
of chocolate exported from Switzerland every year, how can we NOT
have a chocolate-based ROADBLOCK? One team member will enter the
hotel, go to the kitchen and use chocolate to help make a
Travelocity(TM) "Roaming Gnome"! But you must use exacting Swiss
methods, INCLUDING using snow as a cooling agent. The head
chocolatier will approve your creation and, if approved, will trade
your creation for a REAL "Roaming Gnome" with your clue on the
bottom. You MUST carry the Gnome for the rest of the Leg and to the
Vyxsin, Herb, Mallory and
Jen decide to do the deed. They all don chef coats and take a Gnome
mold, using different colored chocolate to paint the front of the mold
to look like the front of the Gnome in the corner of the kitchen.
Meanwhile, their teammates look on...and chomp on some chocolate samples
laid before them.
Meanwhile, on the huge sheet
of ice, Zev & justin FINALLY get the top half of the dummy out. Once
again, it's not necessary that the dummy be in one piece; just out of
the ice will do. So they, as Ah-nald would say, GIT TO ZE CHOPPA! and
head for the resort in last. They wait for the train, hoping against
hope that someone switched DETOURs.
Back at the hotel, Vyxsin is
being MUCH more careful than usual, wanting to get it right. The others
work on one part and then freeze it in a small freezer (which Kent keeps
calling an oven)...but Vyxsin wants the whole front half done first
before freezing and working on the back half. Mallory had enough of
Kent's constant talking. But things get MORE stressful as Zev comes in
as Team Puzzle Pieces' ROADBLOCKer (basically because Zev's only done 3
to Justin's 5 and the "six-'BLOCK-per-teammate" limit is still in
place). And more stress means even MORE talk from Kent for Vyxsin to
"kick it up a notch", as it were.
But, at one point, Herb went
to put one half in the freezer...and says that someone ELSE had his
OTHER half. So Jen and "Flight Time" sorted out the others, but they
still couldn't find out whose is whose. Vyxsin, who remembers wher she
put HERS, asks Herb to stop carrying her mold around and put it back in
the freezer...but he wants some ANSWERS because he is NOT going through
this again! He finally decides to work on a different mold...and "Big
Easy" is CERTAIN that Vyxsin is working on Herb's one. Kent thinks
that's a heavy accusation...but Nate is adamant. Herb just wants to move
on since it seemed inadvertant, but the other teams think a penalty
should be assessed. (Vyxsin is seen crying after the Leg is over for
being accused like that.)
The mood lightens after a
while, though, as the teams continue creating their cocoa-covered
concoctions. It's Herb that finishes both parts first, though. the head
chocolatier then fills the mold with some chocolate and has him swirl
the sweet stuff around to cover the entire outer coating. Now comes the
cool-down...as in "stick the mold in snow outside for at least a
half-hour" cool-down. As he covers the mold with snow, the other teams
fill up THEIR molds and get THEM out in the snow.
(Time passes...and Kent
thinks "Big Easy" is a "Big Bully"...)
The molds come out of the
snow...except for Zev's which is just going INTO the snow. Herb thinks
his is ready, and everybody else follows suit...save for Zev who stays
outside. Carefully, the teams remove the chocolate Gnomes from the molds
and paint over the parts where the brown chocolate seeped through the
halves and any splotches left on the outside. And the first one with a
delicious and good-looking chocolate Gnome is...
VYXSIN! She and Kent get the
first actual Roamin' Gnome and this clue:
MAKE YOUR WAY TO
THE NEXT PIT STOP!
Travel on foot to a 300-year-old
Swiss cabin (called Mittagsstadel& Mürini) marked on the included
map, the PIT STOP of this Leg of the Race.
WARNING! The last team to
check-in MAY BE ELIMINATED!
The first thing they say as
they run out of the hotel is "We need a taxi." (What part of "Travel on
foot" did they miss?) As they look for one, Herb finishes HIS Gnome and
he and Nate depart in second. Jen and Mallory are close behind as their
creations are deemed worthy for exchange. And, when Mallory sees Team
Dating Goths getting into an electric taxi, she KNOWS the
"pink-and-black attack" is going to get attacked with at LEAST a
half-hour penalty. The other teams stop taxis...but only to get
directions, not to ride to there.
Oh...and Zev is still
waiting...and Justin thinks it's all over as they don't know about the
"taxi" issue. But Zev touches up his Gnome and he and Justin leave in
last...but will they be checked-in last at...
MITTAGSSTADEL & MÜRINI SWISS CABIN
Oddly enough, it's "Flight
Time" & "Big Easy" who arrive in front of Phil and the local (and his
Saint Bernard) at the cabin first...and are thusly Team #1! Their reward
this time is a 5-night stay at the Cook Islands in the Pacific near New
Zealand. Way to go "worst-to-first", guys! And the next ones up are
Kisha & Jen, Team #2 once again.
Vyxsin did NOT look too
confident on the ride up, passing so many teams who were hoofing it
instead. Kent didn't care at the time. Well, when they arrived, Kent
learned that he SHOULD have cared. Though the third team to arrive, the
Rules of the Race have been broken; the team travelled by taxi when the
clue CLEARLY said "on foot". That's a 30-minute penalty before being
checked-in...so they shot THEMSELVES in the eye, it seems. This allows
Gary & Mallory to pass them and be the actual Team #3 (just as Mallory
Now the question is...can
Zev & Justin find their way on foot to the cabin before the half-hour is
up? Well, Zev slips in the icy road once...then they go to a "condo"
called "Mürini" but it's not where they belong. Vxysin is worried that
they'll be going home...but Kent wants her to stop with the negativity.
Team Puzzle Pieces get help from one of the condo residents to the
cabin...and Team Dating Goths continue to bicker as to whose fault it
is...and the clock ticks down...
With minutes to go, Zev &
Justin hit the mat. Phil gives the bad news that they're last to
arrive...and then gives the GOOD news that, due to the penalty, they are
Team #4 and STILL in the Race! The sigh of relief, were it any louder,
would've brought the entire Matterhorn mountainside down. It wasn't
their best day...but they're still alive in the Race...so all-in-all, it
ain't a bad day.
Fifth in AR12...fifth in
AR18. Kent & Vyxsin are summoned to the mat and are told they are
eliminated. Not the way they wanted to go out...but they put all the
bickering aside and snuggle with each other afterwards.
AFTER LEG 10:
1) "Flight Time" & "Big
Easy" (+4) - Hawai'i, Cook Islands
2) Kisha & Jen (EVEN)
3) Gary & Mallory (+1) - Express Pass (USED), Snapple(TM) prize
4) Zev & Justin (-3) - Cancun, Costa Rica, Ford Focus, Curacao
ELIMINATED) Kent & Vyxsin (-2)
To see this episode in its
entirety, or to apply to be a contestant on "The Amazing Race", visit
the official website at