The Conference Room Hiring (or as I like to call it, "I
am so glad that this (^_^)ty show is finally finished!")
Its nighttime in Manhattan.
The opening of the show is edited to seem overtly
sexual. Martha rasps, Are you ready? Charles says,
Im ready and Im excited. Alexis, actually looking
more attractive than her typical I havent told my mom
Im a dyke yet, addresses her mother,
and are you
ready? Martha responds, I am very ready. Charles
says, Well, lets go and do it. [Obviously they fail
to understand their target demographic: people who have
failed to change their season pass on TiVo and recappers
who have been shamed into doing recaps for yet another
sucky chick-oriented reality show
] They go into the
parking garage and get into Marthas big black car that
so tastefully matches her horses and the color scheme of
In the back of the car, Martha says that its been great
to have the time to think about Bethenny and Dawna.
Charles says that it all boils down to who Martha thinks
would fit into her organization. Alexis says, One is
more creative and the other is more businesslike. The
question is which candidate is the best one. Martha
says, This is going to be very exciting for everyone.
[Not for me, Martha!]
They arrive on the set of Marthas morning show to the
theme of the Eurythmics Sweet Dreams. The audience is
on its feet and the old castoff, rejected former
candidates can be seen in the audience grasping for
minutes number 14 and 15 of their fifteen minutes of
fame. Martha welcomes everyone to the set. She says that
they started out with 16 candidates, and now they are
down to their final two candidates: Bethenny [who used
to sleep with Charles son] and Dawna. Martha says that
she gave them each tough events to coordinate. Bethenny
was asked to manage a circus benefit, while Dawna was
asked to run a Liz Claiborne fashion show.
A Liz Claiborne executive, Linda Greenblatt, talks to
Amanda and doesnt seem happy with anything that Amanda
has to say about the upcoming fashion show. Dawna says
that Linda Greenblatt seems like the toughest executive
they have met through the interview process. Dawna says
that her job is to make Linda happy, but she is not sure
she can do this. [Hey, its good practice for working
for Martha.] Amanda irritates Linda by calling the
company Liz Clay-burn, rather than Liz Claiborne. Dawna
says that there was so much work to do that she had to
trust Amada to handle the fashions and accessories.
At the Circus, Bethenny talks to the circus folks and
offers them pizza. The head circus guy, Jim, isnt
totally confident that the event is going to happen
without a hitch, but he seems less disgusted by the
Dawna and Amanda talk on the phone and Amanda tells
Dawna not to worry about the fashion show, she will
handle things. Dawna and Howie decide to finish the gift
bags, then go to Liz Claiborne to finish helping with
Psychotic Jim [not to be confused with Circus Jim] and
Carrie trash Bethenny in the loft for being so
unorganized. They talk about the fact that the VIPs are
not being taken care of, nor have tasks been delegated
to them. Carrie snarkily comments to Jim, At some pint,
we will have to assume leadership or watch her fail.
Bethenny says that she understands that her team doesnt
get what she is doing, but she is hoping that they
will just trust her.
Late at night, Dawna and her team are working on the
accessorizing for the fashion show. Dawna really wants
to get the accessorizing finished so that the program
can be completed.
Back to the live show where Martha comments that both
Bethenny and Dawn are off to a rocky start. She also
says that she will make her decision live. [Well,
not-so-live for me here on the West Coast, but we can
Dawna and her team work on last minute details of the
fashion show. Amanda goes over the fashion show with
Linda, who catches a few mistakes on the program, namely
the fact that a skirt was called a shirt, and a
cape-sweater should be called a capelet. Linda gives
Amanda, who is now worried about the program, the news
that she is going to trust her to get things done
properly, then leaves.
At the Circus task Bethenny is decorating her VIP room.
She says, I have to maximize my mind and my creativity
to utilize the resources I had been given. I had to use
the product from the sponsors and I had to think outside
the box. She gives her team directions: Just take
stuff and make it look great. [Wow, how profound!]
Amanda calls Dawna and tells her about the changes that
Linda made to the program. Dawna asks her to email the
changes, but Amanda doesnt think that she will have
time, so they go over the changes via cell phone. Sarah
says that the great thing about Dawna is the fact no
matter how stressful the situation, she always remains
calm. Dawna worries that the programs will not be
printed in time for the fashion show.
At the Circus event, people marvel at the beautiful
program. People are lined up for the event and Bethenny
orders the house to be opened. Martha arrives and
Bethenny escorts her through the event. Bethenny shows
her all of the silent auction items. As Martha chows
down on Pringles, Bethenny tells her that a trip to
trapeze school is up for auction. Martha says that she
wants to buy it for Alexis.
At the fashion show, Dawna has Howie work on gift bags.
She is careful to thank him as she orders him around.
Howie is totally on-task until a model, wearing a
provocatively short skirt, walks by. Sarah shows up with
the programs and realizes that they suck. Dawna explains
that they really wanted to do something special but they
didnt have time. Linda from Liz Claiborne is disturbed
by the fact that the company logo isnt on the program,
nor is the title centered.
Martha watches as the circus folk do their things. Ryan
comments that the circus event went off without a hitch
and he is impressed. Charles compliments Bethenny on the
good job that she did. Bethenny says goodbye to her
team, who later grouse that she gave a lukewarm
handshake as she drove off into the sunset.
Just before the event opens, Dawna went to the front of
Liz Claiborne to greet Martha. Martha tells Dawna that
her dentist got married in the same venue last year. The
show starts and goes off without problems. Dawna is a
bit teary-eyed as the executives come up to her and
compliment her, even the previously bitchy Linda. Dawna
thanks her team, there are group hugs and everyone tells
Dawna that she deserves to win.
The applicants pack their belongings in the loft.
Bethenny says that she went through the process to prove
that she is as strong and as special as she thought
she was. Bethenny also says that out of the sixteen
applicants, she is the only person who truly understands
Marthas brand. Dawna, who thinks that she is more
experienced than Bethenny, says that she wants this more
than anything else she can remember. Both Dawna and
Bethenny are confident that Martha will be giving them
In the conference room, Martha says that she was very
impressed with the Circus Program. She says that the Liz
Claiborne people were not as impressed. Dawna tells
Martha that the Liz Claiborne people kept making changes
with the clothing and the order of the models, so it was
impossible to produce a really nice program for the
fashion show. [Yeah, that and the fact that Amanda was a
total fuck-up on this task.]
Now its time for the contestants to trash each other.
Dawna talks about how Bethenny rubs people the wrong way
and that most of the other people in the loft didnt
enjoy working with Bethenny. Bethenny says that there is
nothing special about Dawna. Bethenny says that she is
looking for a life, not just a stepping stone. Dawna
says that the job wouldnt just be a stepping stone for
her, that its about media and publishing. Bethenny says
that Dawna really doesnt care about Martha. Martha says
that she is going to make up her mind and thanks Dawna
and Bethenny for their efforts.
Martha welcomes Bethennys team (Jim, Carrie and Ryan),
along with Dawnas team (Sarah, Howie and Amanda).
Martha next welcomes Bethenny and Dawna. Martha asks
Charles what he thinks about Bethenny. Charles said that
Bethenny has shown passion, creativity, and has grown a
lot, but has a problem playing and working well with
others. Martha asks Alexis about Dawna. Alexis tells
Martha that if she really wants to know what she thinks
she will have to tune into Alexis radio show on Sirius.
Everyone laughs, but then Alexis says that Dawna is
dispassionate, but would be a better fit for Marthas
Martha starts asking questions of the final teams. She
asks Amanda what qualities Dawna lacks as a leader.
Amanda says that Dawna is one of the strongest leaders
she has ever met, so she cant think of any qualities
Dawna lacks. Martha asks Jim if Bethenny chose her team
well. Jim says that Bethenny showed great management
skill in picking her team, and since the event went off
without problems, she is obviously good at picking out
talent [meaning himself, of course]. Martha comments
about the fact that the Liz Claiborne executives werent
happy, and asks Sarah for her opinion. Sarah says that
she doesnt think that they were mad at how the event
went off; they were upset about the timelines and how
little time there was to get things done. Martha asks
Bethenny why she didnt praise her team after they did
so well at the Circus task. Bethenny says that she did
say thank you, but that her team was disgruntled and
didnt want to be there. She says that she had to have a
more passive management style. Martha wonders if
Bethenny has the business skills to work at her company,
but Bethenny says that she has the skill to make things
happen. Martha comments that Dawna is a detail person
and a people person, but the client remarked that she
didnt have an overall vision for the fashion show.
Dawna comments that her event went off without a hitch,
and even her harshest critic Linda said that she
couldnt believe that Dawna pulled off the event. Dawna
says that she felt comfortable with the executives at
Martha Stewart and would be a good fit. Bethenny says
that she would fit in at Martha Stewart because she
understands Martha, her vision and is inspired by her.
Martha says, Bethenny, you are spunky, you are a
showoff, you feel that you have to make a physical
impression, which is not necessary at Martha Stewart.
Martha continues, Dawna you are clearly a talented
manager and we could always use somebody with your
business acumen at Martha Stewart Omnimedia and I would
like to offer you the job as my apprentice.
The audience applauds and hugs are traded. Martha tells
Dawna that she will be working for Marthas magazine
Body + Soul and then tells the audience that if they
would really like to help Dawna they will subscribe to
the magazine. Dawna will be the Development Director of
the magazine and will be in charge of finding
advertisers for the magazine. Martha gives champagne to
everyone except Dawna, who is given A BRAND NEW CAR!
Yes, Dawna leaves in a Buick Lucerne. A voiceover says
that souvenirs from the show are available at
marthastewartauctions.com. [I checked out the auctions
and there are bargains to be had
some T-shirts are
listed for $0.99 because there have been no bidders.]
Dawna goes out to her new car and drives off into the
streets of New York, likely never to be heard from
(C-Note: and thank God for