It's Tuesday, April 19. Thirty-five million sets of eyes are on one focal point... Ryan's hair. And after that, we have seven singers waiting for your vote to keep them alive as we move closer to crowning the next American Idol.

This week... it's all about the 70s dance music. So dictates the theme. Now here's what I don't get. Why not just call it disco? Hell, we even have a disco ball!

Are we in for the most energetic week ever? Well, let's get it on! First up, Constantine Maroulis. He covers "Nights on Broadway" by the Bee Gees. He says he thinks about glam and finger-pointing when it comes to the 70s.

What they say: Randy liked the song choice, but called the overall package a Las Vegas performance. "It was alright, but it wasn't like, oh my God!" Paula begs to differ. No, literally, she does. "You have a habit of picking the right songs, mix it with theatrics. You've got stage presence. You're going to be selling lots of records." Simon calls on Constantine's roll, but likens the performance to a waiter in a Spanish/Vegas nightclub playing performer.

What we say: I don't know what Randy and Simon are talking about. That was a genuine Constantine performance right there with a good song choice. But I would lose the lounge lizard duds. That's career suicide. And a nice tit-for-tat with the band. You know, when you play on the band like that, it makes you sound better. When you just play off the band... well, you take your chances.

Good start to the show, but we roll on to Carrie Underwood, who thought, after hearing the theme, "Oh man, I'm in trouble. A) I don't know that much about 70s dance music and b) we really don't have that many nightclubs in Checotah, Oklahoma." Get into trouble with "Macarthur Park" by Donna Summer.

What they say: Randy officially welcomes Carrie into the Dawg Pound, saying that she's one of the best singers in the competition. Paula calls Carrie on a note that shook the heavens. Simon likes the song, but has issue with this week's look: "Barbie meets the Stepford Wives."

What we say: You may not have noticed it, but Carrie flubbed a lyric again ("Macarthur's Park"), and her hairstylist needs to be fired. I defer the rest of the time on this contestant to my sister, Quisla.

What Q says: Everything about that performance was horrible.

Not to be confused with the Gloria Estefan version of "Everlasting Love", but we get the Carl Carlton best version (Gloria's a close second) courtesy of Scott Savol, who says that "the 70s ain't his thang."

What they say: Randy is impressed by his song choice. "It was hot." Paula "gives Scotty his props." Simon ... after a brain lapse, finally figures out why Scott is still here. "You are ordinary guy doing quite well. At the same time, ordinary guys can get up at the karaoke bar and sort-of entertain an audience."

What we say: It's uniquely Scott. It's weak to start, strong to finish, and somewhere in the happy medium... in the happy medium. But give Scott props for having fun on stage. But the whole song is marred by miscues on pitch. But that's the only problem. Too bad it's a big and consistent one. Oh yeah, and he talks too much.

Proving that any Joe Schmuck worth his dime in Hollywood can get tickets, Alex Trebek in the audience... looking rather dapper. The answer: "This singer will be this year's American Idol." Who? "I only give the answer." Yeah. We'll find out the question in a month. Right now, another thing big in the 70s (aside from Alex's fro/manperm) was "Don't Take Away the Music". Then, the Tavares. Now, Anthony Fedorov. He took Latin dance for a few years, which does explain the new geeky white boy hotness the girls think he has.

What they say: Randy says, "Everyone says 'Oh man, this might be the week Anthony falls down.' He didn't do it this week!" Paula calls the song choice "soothing." Simon places it amongst the best weeks with a backhanded compliment: "It was pleasant, safe, and a little insipid."

What we say: Still a shade off of perfection pitchwise, but... best... Anthony performance... ever. He needed something like that to keep him in the contest. If he turns out stuff like this, then MAYBE he could be a contender.

MAYBE.

Odds are, oh, one in 750. Reminder: benefit single from the Idols is in store now... BUY! Vonzell Solomon is every woman. Certainly MY woman :). She goes for Chaka Khan in "I'm Every Woman."

What they say: Randy says Vonzell chose a song with a high degree of difficulty, but worked it out. Paula says she rocked. Simon agrees with Randy. "Your personality can carry a song like that."

What we say: What Whitney Houston broke, Vonzell fixed. The tone was right where it needed to be, and she commanded the stage. Although the background singers need to remember that... they're background singers. I'm trying to hear my girl here!

Next on the disco parade is Anwar Robinson, choosing "September". "The fashion was off the hook." I'll tell you right now. I LOVE Earth Wind & Fire. THAT better be off the hook.

What they say: Randy calls it good, pitchy to start, strong to finish. Paula calls it awesome. Simon doesn't think it was THAT good, not a winning performance.

What we say: Back to classic Anwar. Not a good thing. He only half-sings the song, holding back on the most important parts (that would be, oh, beginning, middle, and end), and... and I CAN'T stress this enough. If you are going to sing Earth Wind & Fire, you HAVE to pull off the falsetto. Anything less is a D, as Quentin Tarantino said.

And your band did it? Hopefully you weren't singing. Well, we've reached last call with Bo Bice, who chose "Vehicle" by the Ides of March. He never got the dance thing. And he's not much of a dancer, but he likes to get everyone up to dance.

What they say: Randy says "Bo Bice is definitely back." He can hear that being recorded. Paula: "Competition is back on." She got chills. Simon calls it authentically good.

What we say: I agree with Simon 100 percent. That was authentic Bo and I loved every minute of it.

Competition is definitely on. There wasn't a single-worst performance in the night, and Ryan makes sure everyone knows it... but for purposes of comparison...

Disco Inferno: Vonzell, Constantine, Bo
Disco Sucks: Carrie, Anthony, Anwar
Scott Savol: Scott

This charting was hard. Sure, they were all good, but still, one person has to go home. Sorry, folks. That's just the rules. If you want to win, you have to survive the public vote. One person will not. Randy thinks Simon's going home. Paula doesn't play politics. Simon says, based on a miserable performance... Ryan should go home. We'll see if Simon's right in 24.

I doubt he is, though.

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