(C-Note: some of the acts that you are
about to read involve real danger in front of a live audience. They were
designed, practiced, and supervised by professionals, taking the
contestants' safety into full account. They are extremely dangerous and
should NEVER be attempted anywhere, by anyone, at any time.)
Last night, some of the best talent Florida had to offer came out...
including one repeater. but we're not done yet. Auditions continue in ...
We're back in the Loop with ... Howie's mom Evy. Hi, Evy.
First up for round 2 is a soulless ginger by the name of Tom Bonham (65,
retired computer specialist), a puppeteer. He says that puppetry involves being
imaginative. Right now, we're going to imagine him with a teddy bear on his
shoulder. Now we're imagining him with stick puppets of the judges... and the
real McCoys are about to give him what for. Actually, Howie's soaking it up.
HOW? He calls it atrocious, but he loves it. But if he goes to Vegas, he'll "do
something that'll make all three of you proud". And as usual, it falls to Sharon
to be the voice of reason... Sorry.
Unfortunately, that's not the end of it. We have a drummer, a person who...
likes to recycle aluminum, a trick roper, and a giant chicken. Monty Hall
unavailable for comment. By the way, with the way he pushes the buzzer,
Howard would like to "ass" you to stop.
Isaac Bryan Brown (6, student) is going to sing and dance, hoping that maybe
his sisters will like him afterwards. Good luck with that, little homey. He
sings "I Want You Back" just like MJ in the day. Not too shabby for a little
kid. The judges love him, and the Fourth Judge love him. He's going to Vegas.
Spencer Horsman claims to be the world's youngest escape artist at 26. It is
dangerous. There's a high risk. And there is a chance that young Spencer may be
killed. Don't panic. And we can't stress this enough. Don't try... don't die. He
will have 90 seconds to free himself from a straitjacket WHILE a fuse connected
to a trap surrounds him. After that time... Snap goes the trap. And possibly
Spencer. My guess is that he escapes, because NBC would not air a snuff film on
this show. JUST. MADE IT. Perhaps the most dangerous act on AGT history. And we
may yet see more, because he's going to Vegas.
Joining him: Clark Academy (Irish step dancers), Svet (hip hop violin), and a
slew of other unmentionables, including Jake Wesley Rogers (guitarist). If you
want a shot to join THEM, go to Youtube.com/AGT. Submissions ust be in by
Next... Ozzy. Actually, it's Lin Doak (Colonial Heights, VA), who's known
worldwide as... "Little Ozzy". He's just here for Sharon, which, if you think
about it, makes a little sense. Little Ozzy sings "Mama, I'm Coming Home", the
song that Ozzy wrote for Sharon. True story. He's a little rough around the
edges as a singer, but as a little performer, the guys think he's come up short.
The Fourth Judge is not slighted on small talk, but what does Sharon think? She
misses Ozzy right now, but... he receives a tiny consolation in a big hug from
Sharon. I got a million of 'em.
The Cut Throat Freak Show (sideshow) steps on broken beer bottles... on feet
AND hands. Meanwhile, we have a chair being lifted by eyelids. You watched it.
You can't unwatch it. Finally, Eric Odditorium swallows swords while the others
retrieve them... with his EYELIDS! That was... freaky. So is Vegas. They'll be
right at home.
How do you follow that? How about with Ron Christopher Porter Jr. (18,
student from DC), who's hoping to VO his way to LV. He could be the next Don
LaFontaine. ... No, he couldn't. But at least he got his voice out there, even
though Howard got his in as well... and that's #2 that he makes cry. He gets a
no, so he will not be coming to a theatre or drive-in near you.
Ron at least gets to introduce the closer for the night... Curtis Cuttsbey (a
recycle-truck driver), who'll be giving us "Give It To Me" by Rick James, b---h.
And not since "Blue Velvet" from season 1 have we had the judges X an act so
And that's all the talent (or absence thereof)
for this week. See you next week!
To see tonight's episode in its entirety,
or to apply to be a contestant on the next season, go to