This summer, Canada chooses the next pop star to follow in the shoes of Ryan Malcolm, but before the search comes to a hallowing end, it comes to a hallowing beginning with... another Ryan, as Ryan Vickers takes the mic for a shot at stardom.

Ryan Vickers
recapper (pictured, giving his best aria)

I fancied some fame. After seeing countless versions of Idol on television, I figured it was my turn to give it a go.

About a week ago, I figured that I had nothing to lose by going down this weekend to try out for "Canadian Idol". During this last week, I wavered, thinking I would go, I would not, what am I doing, etc., that type of stuff. Even last night I wasn't even sure.

The Pre-Audition...

I had had intentions to go to the audition site last night at 9 pm to get in line, anticipating it was going to be very very long. However after I awoke from a short nap at 6 pm, I decided it wasn't in my best interest.

I did, however, get up at the horrid hour of 5 am, was out of the door at 5:30, and walked the half hour to the downtown hotel where the auditions were taking place.

It turned out my hedging of bets was correct. At 6:30, a producer came out and gave us the basic, and promptly at 8 am, as was previously told on their web site, registration started. I later found out that they were slightly lower than last year, around 275 people. Which was good for me; it meant that myself and everyone present would get seen before noon. This is compared to a large audition site where sometimes you have to wait for days.

The Audition...

Back to 8 am then. Everyone that was present (including the brave souls that had camped out in the ballroom where the auditions were being held) lined up and we were "assigned a number based on the order in which we joined" (apologies to Homer Simpson). In actual fact we were mixed up so that we wouldn't be with the people we had just gotten to know.

And I do believe that was part of the fun. Hanging out, talking with very friendly people - Newfoundlanders pride themselves on this aspect of
their lives. I was lucky enough to meet quite a few people, including some who had made the trip from the other side of the island on a free bus shuttle. Everyone was very relaxed, even if they were stressing themselves out by singing their audition pieces.

It was pointed out to us by some staffers that the first step in the whole process would be done in groups of five. If you were selected to go through, you'd get a pink ticket, and an hour later, you'd be auditioning
for another producer, in hopes of a green ticket. These people would then come back the next day to audition for the celebrity judges. So a very quick, efficient process.

At around 11:30, my number was called, and I waited in the front of the room, with about four other groups of five. Twenty minutes later we were in the prep room, chatting with Jon Dore, the show's "correspondent" (sort of like Dunkleman, but you'll notice that Jon still has a job.).

The Short Form Result Show...

Shortly before 12, our group was ushered into see a producer in a very small room. Song choices ranged from "Beautiful" to "Follow Me" (by Uncle Kracker). I chose a tried and tested song, "Lean on Me". I got to sing one verse and one chorus. Right after I finished, the producer stated that "I'd like to thank everyone but today I'm only going to keep 1767". A short trip
down memory lane revealed that was not my number, and my Canadian Idol audition experience was over.

In retrospect, I would have sang "Chimpan-A to Chimpan-Z" from the Simpson's "Planet of the Apes" episode, but hey, what are you going to do.

So should I put "Canadian Idol Reject" on my resumé then?

We'll see if my mug gets on TV when the show starts this summer.

POSTLUDE: It didn't. Maybe that was best.

On the web: Canadian Idol - CTV.ca