Seed of Trista
Chico Alexander (with special appearance by Travis as
Welcome to the Seed of Trivia. This is the portion of
the show where viewers send in their questions, and we
go to great lengths to answer them. When we are done,
the Chairman will have new trivia to evaluate. Here is
"Chico, Chairman, hello." Hello. "I have been watching
ABC for a long time, even after they cancelled
Millionaire, and I was wondering what the deal was with
Trista Sutter. Ever since the Bachelorette, it seems
like she has been given free air time at her beck and
call. And now that she's gone on the first round of
Dancing with the Stars, it gets me asking: isn't America
tired of her yet? I think this seed shouldn't be left on
the floor alone. Thank you very much."
So today's Seed is... "The public allure of Trista
Sutter's talents is..." We'llfindout! Let's take a look
at the column.
Five years ago, Trista Rehn was a dancer with the Miami
Heat and a physical therapist. Then came the call of
"The Bachelor". A first in reality television, one
person would choose another through a steady stream of
eliminations. In the end of the first season, we were
left with Trista and Amanda Marsh.
Trista... lost. But not
for long, as she was cast as the first "Bachelorette."
There, she met firefighter Ryan Sutter. He became the
first winner of that franchise, which led to the first
wedding of the series... and so far, the only wedding.
Broadcast over three weeks as a miniseries.
Trista & Ryan became
America's sweethearts, and were invited to three other
reality properties: Ryan on "Fear Factor", and Trista on
"Dancing with the Stars" and "Battle of the Reality TV
"Battle" has not yet
aired. But Trista and Louis were one of the second-place
finishers in week 1, while they quick-stepped their way
to a fourth-place finish, 37 points to a last-place 30.
They could have survived last week... Rachel Hunter and
her partner, Jonathan, in last place... survive on the
viewer's vote, leaving Trista & Louis as the first team
eliminated. But does this mean that America has tired of
the one-time Bachelorette?
We decide to
We first head to a
self-proclaimed student of celebrity style. My sister.
We ask her the question out right, "Are you tired of
Trista Sutter yet?" Her response... "Yeah. More than you
are. If that's at all possible." We then asked the only
TV writer and critic we could find on short notice...
"You mean after being on 'The Bachelor', 'The
Bachelorette', The Miss America Pageant, "Trista &
Ryan's Wedding", "Trista & Ryan's Honeymoon", and now
"Dancing with the Stars"? How could anyone be
tired of her?"
Of course, two swallows
don't make a summer, as anyone can tell you. So we
probed deeper. The Fans of Reality TV web board.
One person writes: "I
could happily live the rest of my life without seeing
her on my TV again."
Another person writes: "Poor Trista, everyone is so
cruel to her. I dunno but I loved her as the B'ette and
on the Bach and their wedding and them on Fear Factor.
And I always thought she was very bright-- she is the
only one of 9 to choose the right guy/gal."
Once we eliminated posts
like these, those that sway opinion, we were left
with... just one post that we could use. "In Trista's
defense, playing to the audience/camera is part of a
ballroom dance competition. She was certainly coached to
do this." We can see this as most of the camera time is
focused on her and not her partner. "I do not fault her
for seeking gigs on TV. It sure beats a 9 to 5, 40+ hour
a week job! I do think she should go back to blonde and
cut some bangs though."
Still inconclusive. We
then turn to the ultimate decider. Google. We typed in
"Trista Sutter" as the search term and wait... We hit
4660 times. Discarding official pages, "free nude
pictures" and, of course, this page... And we're down to
about 1000. We then take some terms that describe her as
a person. Not necessarily as a bachelorette or as a
mother or as a dancer or as a reality TV star. And we
got such terms as "media whore"... "roadwhore"... and
our personal favorite: "Former "Bachelorette" Trista
Sutter could be on her way to becoming ABC's hottest new
talent of the moment."
And them comes this
treatise from an LA-based publicist: "Their celebrity is
not based on achievement in the arts. It's based on
(fan) acceptance. It doesn't have the same cachet. They
don't fit in." Translation, according to the USA
Today article: "For an Oscar nominee and box office
behemoth such as Smith, celebrity is an
at-times-unwanted byproduct of his career choice. For
Trista Sutter, it's the other way around: She might end
up having a showbiz future only because she's already
famous. And as celeb-watchers point out, the two aren't
Quoting Liz Smith, syndicated columnist: "Do I think
these people are real stars? No, they're just part of
this crappy C-list celebrity thing. [They] might make
news, (but) they're not stars. You have to have a little
New trivia has been born into this world... Thank you
Jar Jar Binks of Tenafly, New Jersey!
"The public allure of Trista Sutter's talents is...
We have the result of the Seed, and now the Chairman
will determine its level of bloom. Whenever you're
ready, Chairman... Pull your lever!
*Chairman pulls lever*
It's a 42 percent bloom! Why so much?
Chairman: Finally, we have an answer. In these
days, all it takes for someone to become famous is to be
on any of these dime-a-dozen dating or contest shows.
Winning isn't even important anymore, either. Forty of
those points go to the crack research team, for digging
through mountains of materials, for lo those hours,
trying to find any talent other than batting her
eyelashes and mugging for the camera. Wait...can we take
a second whack at the question?
Chico Alexander thanks Quisla and Tom for their insight,
and Travis for taking the role of Chairman. Now can you
please give it back? Thank you. E-mail him at firstname.lastname@example.org.